Member: Jenny M.
Location: Washington
Remote Name: 63.191.224.164
Date: 08 Feb 2004
Time: 11:15 AM -0500
Hi my name is Jenny and I am an alcoholic. This is one that I don't quite understand. Though I have many shortcomings I am hoping that I work on them daily through these shortcomings by taking a daily inventory. I know that my drinking behavior and the reasons that used to make me drink no longer do. Alcoholism is a very irrational disease, and once I take that drink I am setting myself up for trouble and misfortune. I just want to be the best person I can be and be true to myself and others.
Member: Kim M.
Location: FL
Remote Name: 66.245.22.177
Date: 08 Feb 2004
Time: 12:21 PM -0500
Steps 6 & 7 overlap each other on addressing our character defects. Step 6 focuses on willingness, where step 7 centers on humility. Humility is NOT an invitation to low self-esteem or a negative self-image. It is the freedom to receive and appreciate our HP's greatness. My spiritual hunger could not be achieved by materialistic accomplishments. And in surrendering my own limitations I accepted the guidance from my HP. I first recognized the severity of my character defects. I did not minimize the pain that they inflicted. Secondly, I knew that I could not relieve these defects on my own. And lastly that I humbled myself before my HP, I knew that his power would transform my life. I believe that my HP would not carry me this far to drop me on my butt and desert me. Only I could do that. Humbly pray the 7th Step prayer and make a commitment to your HP.
Member: Adam H.
Location: New York, NY
Remote Name: 64.232.156.194
Date: 08 Feb 2004
Time: 03:47 PM -0500
Adam, alcoholic. You want to know a really great definition for humility? "Being completely willing to cooperate with no ifs, ands or buts." I take very seriously what it says in the 12 & 12 that God does not render us white as snow and keep us that way without our cooperation. What that means in terms of Step 7 for me is that it's not very humble of me to expect God to do all the work to change me. He can only take away what I am willing to give up, so I feel it's very important after I ask God to remove my defects of character to start doing the opposite of those defects of character. Since dishonesty, rage, and manipulation were some of my worst character defects, the best way I can communicate to God that I am willing to give up those defects those defects is to live one day at a time telling the truth in all my affairs, restraiing tongue and pen when agitated, and trying to Let Go and Let God when I feel the urge to fix, manage and control. Beyond those things, humility, for me, is also about remembering that the removal of defects of character will take place on God's schedule, not mine. To me, that means I may have to be content with gradual improvement and I may have to allow for the possibility that I may make a lot of mistakes along the way...but it also means to remember that God does have me, good and bad. Thanks for letting me share.
Member: Mav/Mark
Location: Albany, NY
Remote Name: 171.75.160.116
Date: 08 Feb 2004
Time: 09:44 PM -0500
You know something funny? The first time I ever said the 7th step prayer was on my original journey through the steps. My sponsor at the time simply had me kneel down with him in a quiet little corner of a room a room off the local AA clubhouse where I was attending like 3 meetings a day at the time. I was sober like maybe a month and I didn't relly think it a big deal at the time as I loved prayers I loved to say new prayers anyway. Well, the funny thing is that about a month or two later I incorporated that prayer, along with the 3rd step prayer, and the St. Francis(11th) prayer into my daily routine as well. They were for about a year and a half very important to me every morning. The St. Francis prayer I'd been saying my whole life, so that wasn't as "new" to me, but then something funny happened; I had the realization that the prayer was meaningless unless it was not only in my hert and mind, but my actions as well. Anyone can lkneel down with anyone else and say some simple words, but it's got to be in my heart or it means nothing. I haven't said the prayer in the exact semantic wording ever since, yet I know God knows it's in my heart far more than it ever was when I actually performed the semantic display daily. I strive to be a better man in every possible fashion and in order to do so it is essential that I continue to see where I fall short of the glory of God. Rest assured, even after a fairly long time without drinking I still have plenty of room for improvement in order to become the Saint I am called to be. Yep, you heard me, a Saint. They were far from perfect as well and I pray now that I never stop trying to attain being as good a man as I could have been. If I buy the ideal that "we are not saints," without even knowing about the lives of the saints and how imperfect they were too, I will never remove my shortcomings as I will use it as an EXCUSE, nothing more. "WE are not saints" is right as I can't speak for others in AA, but I AM personally striving to be and step 7 is but a minor, yet absolutely essential element of that calling....Pray for me....
Member: King's Dragon
Location: Karmic Retribution
Remote Name: 64.12.96.137
Date: 09 Feb 2004
Time: 06:58 PM -0500
The Him God of the Bible, said "Let US (not me or I) make man in our image and likeness that does mean that man's qualities are also like God's right? I mean the fact that God put Lucifer and his band of losers to hell for all eternity without even the compassion and understanding of entities lower than HIm, and the sense of forgiving and helping the guy of its issues, is a great indication that man is really the image of God. Think!
Member: Kim E.
Location: Indiana
Remote Name: 204.180.62.6
Date: 10 Feb 2004
Time: 06:59 AM -0500
Hi my name is Kim, alcoholic. As I read the postings before me I wanted to see the 7th step prayer. What an awesome thing the Internet is, as I typed "7th step prayer" into a search engine, it immediately appeared before my eyes. (Of course I'd like to say my Big Book is by my side at all times for easy reference, but I am not a saint yet either). Anyway, here it is: 7th Step Prayer My Creator I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to You and my fellows. Grant me strength as I go from here to do your bidding. Amen -Page 76 Alcoholics Anonymous I've been sober for 14 years and have become aware recently that I still have a great fear of people. Especially on the job I am afraid to speak up for myself. As a result I become resentful, angry, and withdrawn. I think my angry feelings are my (un-humble) attempts to remove my shortcomings. And in this light my shortcomings are everyone else's behaviors but mine. I need to turn it back around and truly take the 7th step by asking God to remove my fear of people. That's all I can do. I can't ask God to change anyone else but me. Thanks for being here and letting me share.
Member: Nate W.
Location: Spokane, WA
Remote Name: 24.18.115.53
Date: 10 Feb 2004
Time: 10:52 AM -0500
Hi Kim, Nate an alcoholic, it always seems like why do I have to change, but in all honesty I know it will be good, as well for the others they have seen the change and it seems that they have started adapting to my changes, for the better. Thanks
Member: richard m
Location: sarasota
Remote Name: 204.193.117.81
Date: 10 Feb 2004
Time: 11:01 AM -0500
thank you...my name is richard m..........i am an alcoholic.my sobriety date is december 28,1985..........ONE DAY AT A TIME .........WE DO KNOW A NEW FREEDOM AND HAPPINESS AS SOON AS WE ADMIT THAT WE ARE POWERLESS OVER ALCOHOL AND THAT OUR LIVES ARE UN MANAGEBLE......... then come the beginning of recovery on a daily basis and sometimes ..hourly ...or momentarily..... i have been enjoying my "freedom from alcohol " on a daily basis.......many others have died or lost more ............simply because they didn't get the message......i am eternally gratefull to "GOD" FOR ALLOWING ME TO HAVE THE GRACE TO CONTINUE" i LOVE GOD UNCONDITIONALLY AND EACH PERSON TTHAT HE PLACES IN MY PATH..........AMEN
Member: Mike J.
Location: Pennsylvania
Remote Name: 152.163.252.100
Date: 10 Feb 2004
Time: 11:27 AM -0500
KD from KR: Thinking only produced in me,given some of the facts, the ability to understand what is known. There are even for the most learned of men phenomena beyond our current comprehension.I was pleasently suprised how the big book's chapter to the agnostic was able to speak so simply about matters that I had found so complicated for most of my adult life.Everyone of us is compelled to find our way but it was only through surrender to the unknown for me that I was able to gain peace and experience a power greater than my own will. In AA love and respect, Mike
Member: Craig L (Dogmanor@yahoo.com)
Location: Aloha, Oregon
Remote Name: 65.102.43.100
Date: 10 Feb 2004
Time: 03:38 PM -0500
ăHumbly askedä, LOL, that was a tough one for this drunk. I was profoundly insane. Maybe Iâm a little less insane today, maybe not, but I am happier. LOL. For me it was insane to keep drinking even though I wanted to stop and my life was becoming more and more miserable. I didnât believe in anything except that I wanted to be dead, and the sooner the better. I was bull headedly determined nothing was going to make a difference. Alcohol took away every thing, including my will to fight. When I went to God the first time, I didnât even really believe there was a God, but I was terrified of getting drunk again. I did what my sponsor asked me to do and after my 5th step, I sat alone for an hour thinking about what I had said out loud and then I asked the God of my understanding to remove these defects. Nothing profound happened, but over the next few days I found, I was a nicer person, I was at Peace for the first time ever. Today God is a fact of my life. I donât understand why it worked but it did and still does.
Member: Peggy E
Location: Salem, Oregon
Remote Name: 67.164.52.213
Date: 10 Feb 2004
Time: 08:58 PM -0500
"My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding. Amen" Big Book - page 76 I can't do this myself = there is a God, but I'm not it. I'm Peggy. I'm an alcoholic.
Member: Tom A.
Location: Carlisle, AR
Remote Name: 66.112.36.183
Date: 10 Feb 2004
Time: 09:25 PM -0500
Good Evening from Carlisle, Arkansas. Tom A.here, a grateful sober alcoholic by the grace of a wonderful Higher Power and this fellowship we call A.A. In the Discussion Meeting I mention that the principles of Honesty - Openmidedness an Willingness help me to deal with the Steps, Tradition, and Concepts and these are the tools I use. I cannot tell you the first time I surrendered to this Step, but I can assure you that it is an important tool for daily sobriety. About 15 years ago, I became involved with doing a prayer journal and it is in the form of a daily letter to the God of my understanding and that is where I deal with my shortcomings another word for my sins. All I can say is that it has worked one day at a time. Glad to back with the Stay Cyber folks and I am pleased with how the site is managed. Love and prayers from an alky who cares. God Bless - Tom A. cte50203@centurytel.net
Member: Rarely
Location: rontherocket@hotmail.com
Remote Name: 207.161.34.116
Date: 11 Feb 2004
Time: 01:12 AM -0500
Rarely and Im an alcoholic, When I arrived at this step I had just finished asking myself... is this all there is to life, eat work and sleep. I still diden't have no purpose in life and I sure diden't know who I was. My defects where now causeing me a lot of pain now that I knew what they were. and try as I might, and even though I had made lots of progress in the program I found that I still fell short. I would get a little taste of serenity, but it was still out of reach. I looked up the word shortcoming and the meaning that I found was " A deficiency in quality " and that is what I had. A deficiency in the quality of my sobriety. And the deficiency was not knowing what Gods will was for me. I really never knew who I was and what my purpose was here. Sponsor asked me " who are you if your asleep and have no name and what would your purpose be..I started to reply Im an alcoholic and he said no no you don't know a man by what he suffers from. He asked me what would be your purpose here on earth if there was no money or competitevness. that was easy to figure out... every A.A. group has that their primary purpose is not money and no one is any better than the next member. So who am I and whats my purpose here. It found on page 76 of the 12x12 or the last page of step seven. It goes something like this " this is the step where we move out of ourselves towards others and towards God using humility as our guide. and the way I understand humility..... the basic ingredient of all humility is a desire to seek and do Gods will (pg.72 12x12) Life in A.A. is exciting for me. I am beyond my wildess expectations. I really do love and care for my fellow man. and the most amazing thing that I never knew was possible is the fact that at 68 years old Im madly in love with my wife. Love and Hugs
Member: AZbill
Location: azbill1172@cox.net
Remote Name: 68.226.19.154
Date: 11 Feb 2004
Time: 01:58 PM -0500
HI Bill here, alcoholic from Arizona. Since there is no rank or position in AA, then the "other" meaning of humbly must apply. "Having or showing a consciousness of one's defects or shortcomings." Most of us know that Bill Wilson liked to use different words to mean the same thing. He used "defects" in Step 6 and "shortcomings" in Seven. Now, does he mean shortcomings and defects to be the same? Or... is he referring to shortcomings meaning those things we conveniently or accidently over looked up to now? :) If not worked out of the big book, the true purpose of six and seven may often be overlooked. In Six we want them all removed. In Seven He will only remove those that stand in the way of our usefulness to Him and our fellows. More simply put, up to now I have been working on my defects as I perceived them. From Seven on I will be working on them as God perceives them, Big spiritual change here. Thanks. I love you. Bill
Member: Sheri
Location: wyoming
Remote Name: 204.227.205.36
Date: 11 Feb 2004
Time: 06:14 PM -0500
Sheri Here Alki just wanted to say how awseome it is to hear some of the promisis I can't wait to get there. Thanks for all the sharing Sher
Member: mike
Location: mount forest ,ont.canada
Remote Name: 65.93.140.25
Date: 11 Feb 2004
Time: 06:31 PM -0500
Hi my name is Mike and I am an greatful recovering alcoholic. This is one I do stand. Though I have many shortcomings why do new ones come up when you think you got over them all but I guess it is life to have new ones or life would be perfect which it's not I am hoping that I work on them daily through these shortcomings by taking a daily inventory and to turn them over
Member: SC Tech
Location: x
Remote Name: 66.223.56.135
Date: 15 Feb 2004
Time: 07:11 PM -0500
test
Member: SC Tech
Location: x
Remote Name: 66.223.56.135
Date: 15 Feb 2004
Time: 07:11 PM -0500
test 2
Member: Mike J.
Location: Pennsylvania
Remote Name: 129.120.160.6
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 07:38 AM -0500
test2
Member: Glen H
Location: Tx
Remote Name: 129.120.160.6
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 07:42 AM -0500
test again
Member: Tim G.
Location: PA
Remote Name: 24.238.76.33
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 09:13 AM -0500
jkljkljkl
Member: Tim G.
Location: PA
Remote Name: 65.120.69.44
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 10:18 AM -0500
qqqqqqq
Member: Joe P
Location: Chicago
Remote Name: 65.59.9.207
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 11:06 AM -0500
My name is Joe, and I am an alcoholic. Ask for a little help, get a little help. Ask for a lot of help, get a lot of help.
Member: Tim G.
Location: PA
Remote Name: 65.120.69.44
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 11:17 AM -0500
zzzzzzzxxxx
Member: Ashley O.
Location: Seattle
Remote Name: 64.134.240.240
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 01:04 PM -0500
My name is Ashley and I am an alcoholic. It is so crazy that this is the steo of the week, since I am currently working on it - trudging through it. A few months ago I was in a speaker meeting and the women speaking shared how she worked the steps. When she talked about step 6 and 7, she shared a way to work it that I had never heard of and I was very interested in trying it. She said that for step 6 you write a letter to each of your character defects and you thank them for all the things that they have done for you (since that is why we continue to practice them - they are doing something for us). Then for step seven you write a letter to your HP and you ask him/her to remove the shortcoming and you write an action that you are going to take to remove the shortcoming. When working this I also included writing the definitions and the antonyms for each defect so that it was more clear as to what action I would take not to practice the defect. I have been holding on to my defects way to long out of fear and only thorugh pain do I become willing to write the letters and ask for my HP's help. I just don't want to be so controlled by my committee in my head anymore - it causes all my pain and suffering. Thanks for letting me share! Ashley O.
Member: Angie d.o.s. 11/16/02
Location: Costa Mesa California
Remote Name: 4.21.203.3
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 06:24 PM -0500
Angie Alcoholic ... someone posted about being willing to give up our shortcomings .... if we are asking him to remove them we need to be willing to give them up.... i have been sober 15 months today ... and the longer i am sober the more glaring my character defects are to me .... for awhile i kinda just sat in limbo ... and made little effort to continue to grow spiritually other then my nightly prayers ... but i am afraid of staying or becomming complacent .... i have very big fears of that ... i want to contonue to grow ... and to do this i know i must work on these defects .... how do we go about being willing to have them removed or is praying all we can do .... is that enough ...
Member: steve P
Location: upstate NY
Remote Name: 129.44.235.204
Date: 16 Feb 2004
Time: 09:08 PM -0500
Hi Steve Alcoholic. Humbly is something I've come to learn in the Rooms of AA. When I drank, I was rarely Humble. To look to a higher power a certain respect of some sort I feel enters upon us. For as it says remove the shortcomings.
Member: Cecil H.
Location: Prestonsburg, KY
Remote Name: 206.28.60.178
Date: 17 Feb 2004
Time: 02:48 AM -0500
Hi everyone, I'm Cecil a grateful recovering alcoholic. For me, all the steps up to Step 5 are pretty simple (although definitely not easy). However..., on steps 6 & 7 my complicated alcoholic thinking tends to take over and I tend to shortcut and look towards/dread 8 & 9 overlooking 6 & 7. Steps 6 & 7 are really about change without which this alcoholic can't stay sober. I don't believe these steps are as much about me changing me, as mainly me doing the footwork and allowing God or HP to lead me to better things. I DON'T have the power to fix me or, I wouldn't be here. I have a tendancy to repeat the mistakes of the past even though I don't drink today. Alot of the footwork for me is simply making the same mistakes as I did drinking, BUT by being sober I can make changes, ask for help, seek spiritual guidance, and discard what obviously doesn't work based on my painful previous experience. By doing the next right thing, the next sober thing, and constantly asking HP to direct my thinking to what He would have me do - I can break the cycle of denial, fear, anger, and frustration which limits my usefulness to HP and my fellows. One of the gifts of humility is the freedom to be me (be it ever so painful), AND the opportunity/neccessity to become the person God wants me to become. As the Big Books says, I have to enlarge my spiritual condition in order to stay sober. Other, than after a 4th & 5th step; I didn't consciously work on these two steps. Looking back however, I can see that I been chasing after the object of these steps (change and growth) as long as I have been sober, mostly overlooking the necessary key ingredient (humility). When I get sick and tired of being sick and tired of whatever character defect is kicking my ass at the moment, then I become willing to discard my insane thinking and become willing to rely on the loving hand of my HP. I then allow Him to help me to break the vicious cycle of repeating the mistakes of the past caused by my character defects. I then become teachable and grow in His image however haltingly. Thanks.