Member: John K.
Location: Manchester NH
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 00:44:26


With this step I have come toa better understanding of myself and the world around me .Realizing that I must change what my character make up is about and trying to progress in my soberity. Asking God to constantly forgive my actions solves nothing,but if in my prayer or meditation I realize that I'm asking forgiveness for the same things over & over again then nothing changes

Member: Geri W.
Location: Virginia
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 07:16:34


Geri here, a very grateful alcoholic. After a little over 7 years of starting each day with a prayer that I stay in God's will throughout the day, I can tell you that it works! Still venture to the privacy of the restroom to have a short chat with God to help me get through a conversation or a situation. Don't leave home without Him. And don't forget to say "thank you " when you realize He's saved your underserving self - one more time. So I try to stay out of the way and let Him run the show - I just do the next right things. God bless you all as He has me.

Member: Glo J.
Location: Florida
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 08:05:44


Hi,Im Glo,alcoholic.I believe God got me sober, but I have to do a lot of footwork to maintain it.Sometimes I really have to push myself to work Step 11.My life is so much better when I do but i'm still a stubborn,procrastinating alkie who sometimes still must learn by mistakes.But,by the grace of God and good people like you,Iv'e stayed sober for 7 yrs.and my life is much, much better,especially when I'm in constant contact with God.

Thanks&God Bless Ya!

Member: Rivner
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 08:40:19


Howdy Neighbors! I'm an alcoholic; name's Rivner.

I used ta complicate the Hell outta meditatin. I had it in my head that I needed ta twist up my bowed up legs n hum up some peaceful sound. The only sound comin outta me was: "Sh*t, this hurts!"

I read somewhere in the literature that, at least for starters, all I really had ta do was round up some regular time n peacefully "consider my day". I could make my plans, but I had to submit them to HP for His editing; His will, not mine.

I am not, n never will be a monk. I try n keep my life real simple: build a house, shovel the manure, feed the chickens, eat the eggs, water the garden, eat the veggies, etc. I find that there's room for a lot of conversation with HP while doin that. The act of "haulin water n choppin wood" is, for me, the road to enlightenment. The very nature of these tasks begs for meditation. It helps me greatly ta have a lot of dirt under my finger nails. It "hooks me up" pretty well.

Quite frankly, when ever I have occasion to get into activities which require me to think, plan, organize n apply what some folks might call "my wisdom", my ego starts thinkin it's pretty healthy n I wind up all cork-screwed into the ground. Then it's time ta feed the chickens n reflect on how that simple act gets me closer to HP. I don't expect ta make a whole lotta sense of it; it jus' seems ta fit real well n sets up the time ahead a little more peaceful.

I do get feelin pretty humbled though, takin all these spiritual lessons from a friggin chicken!

God Speed Ya'long,


Member: Tom D.
Location: Tilton, NH
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 10:13:39


My practice of this step has changed quite a bit in the past few months. During this time I have been forced to take a look at myself, what I have done and how I have behaved in a way I have never done before. So much of what i have heard in AA that I never really had to use before has become crucial for me. I have learned that my "meditation" works best when in two parts: first, sitting quietly and trying to listen and second, a consideration of my actions in the past twenty-four hours and filtering that through my conscience. My prayers have become very, very simple again (pain has a way of doing that). I have been asking for relief from drinking, any addictions and character defects, asking for the ability to be honest with myself and others, and thanking my HP for helping me with this in the past 24.

Expectations are the thing that kill me in life in general, and in Step 11. If I try to do the next right think, doing the best I can to keep my HP in my mind throughout the day, things are usually much better than I think they will be. During this recent and present painful time for me, I have been happier than I have been in years because of my willingness to keep it simple. God saves my ass when I let him/her/it. I cannot and do not ever save my butt when thinking for myself.

God bless you all and keep coming. I intend to!

Member: Shirley M.
Location: Brisbane CA
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 10:58:50


Hi everybody, Shirley, alcoholic

I'm very glad this is the topic because I have been trying to get refocused. I have ten years of sobriety and it seems like the last few years I have returned to living in my head. I pray but I don't really feel cconnected. I'm new to this meeting and I want to say that I think it and you are wonderful.

Thank you Shirley

Member: jack c wanderers three
Location: Friendship Wi
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 13:49:51


Hello everybody. I'm jack c and an alcoholic. I love the program, the steps,traditions, the serenity prayer and every member in AA.---Here is what I like the most, at least for me.STEP 11. I heard and read the expression many times until it finally sunk into my thick bone head. ---"BE STILL AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD' I had to learn how to be still, and how to know. It took a lot of effort to learn to be still. It is not easy to do, with all the noise interference, the radio, tv, appliances, etc.. I shut everything off, even the reading light, lean back, breathe deep, relax, and try to rid my mind of all toughts. When I am sucesful, and now thqat is more often than not,a, 'STILL SMALL VOICE SPEAKS TO ME' and I'm surprised at what I hear. Nothing so great could come out of my feeble brain. Try it, you'll like it. I'm so glad that I read step 11. I'm so glad that God and AA gave me step !!, and I'm so glad, after many nagging suggestions, that I tried it, and recieved very much help practicing it. I now know that if we don't let GOD in, HE will not kick down our door. of indiffference and indulgence. We must invite God into our lives, the best way we know how!! Thanks for listening. A fellow soul mate, happy and contented, and Love ya !!!!!

Member: richard m.   
Location: sqarasota,florida
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 14:48:24


hello my name is richard.i am an alcoholic.......two really good things have come out of that step for me. 1. the knowledge of my problem, i needed to live without drinking alcohol. 2. god's removal of my desire to drink......

Member: mary t
Location: washington
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 15:00:40


Hi there, my name is Mary and I,m an alcoholic. Step 11 is my humbiling step because my ego still likes to tell me i,m some sort of spirtual giant just because HP blessed me with AA. Heck, if I cant be honest with myself and this puter I certinly cant be honest with HP. I do pray everyday and I try to medatate. Some days I feel very connected but most often not. When I do connect to that small voice within I get great advice, if only I would act on it.I do know that follow my gut and get into his action I see his miracles unfold and I,m amazed. You would think I,d follow his advise more but my self will comes in and fear of the unknown stops me dead in my tracks. I guess thats where faith comes in.

Member: Kathleen m
Location: MD
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 20:28:14


Jack C : thank you for sharing."Be still & knkow I am God" is his gentle reminder to me.All day I've been fighting an inner illness & could not pray..the 11th step even after 8 yrs of recovery, can illude me because of fear, anxiety all related to periods of depression.. If I c I pray with my daily readings & calender*(Mother Teresa). but true meditation..

I try to write in my journal &listen to him through my pen to paper. thankyou

Member: Erv W
Location: Adams WI
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 20:37:49


Good evening my name is Erv and I'm an alcoholic,

Thanks Jack C., I have been praying while I have been on the run. I can count on one hand the times I sat still and listened for that tiny voice. Maybe that voice wouldn't agree with my will ?

I know that Gods will for me is better than anything I can think up. However, being a human being I still have those faults, and need to hear from my fellow man what I should be doing. Not only hear but do !!

I do pray for knowledge of God's will for me and the power to carry it out. But it's in my actions that I will be judged. I have heard that the tiniest deed is much more than the greatest intention. When I was drinking I always had those great intentions. Today I have the power from God to act on them. Your friend in sobriety Erv W.

Member: MAGGIE  K.
Location: VERNON B.C.
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 21:04:27



Member: carol (rivnet)
Location: Santa Fe
Date: 17 Jan 1999
Time: 21:10:08


hi i'm carol (rivnet) alc. Jack said - even after 8 yrs step 11 still eludes. my experience is that i never "have it" it is only one day at a time. i have in the past had a very intimate relationship with my HP - that wonderful time came out of extreme pain - I thought i was fall ing apart - my sponsor told me that perhaps i was falling together and just didn't know what that felt like. so i had this wonderful contact with my HP - he was my best friend and constant companion and we even told each other jokes and laughed and played and cried - all i had was me and him and i knew that i could never ask for more. well then complacency and the arrogance of years in the program set in. Now i am struggling to get back to my HP - I know he is still there and always has been and always will be. I am the one into self abandonment and laziness. I sure as hell do not want to go back to the intense pain that originally got me to that spiritual place. I now have to seek that place from deep within myself and just like any relationship - i have to be committed to its attainment and norishment. This step is truly a one day at a time step - I have nothing over the guy newly into AA with a few 24 hours and a burning desire - all i have is today to open this tightly guarded self up to the love and guidance if God - and then I am responsible for the maintenance of it. My life and quality of life depends on it - thanks for the subject and for the shares.

Member: Pam D
Location: Off the freeway in Southern California
Date: 18 Jan 1999
Time: 04:37:01


When I first "tried" this step, I kept complaining that my brain was so screwed up, I couldn't remember to do it. So, my wise old friends in the program (all 6 mo older than me) told me to pick an activity that I did everyday, and then attach an image of "#11" and "connecting to HP" to that activity in my head. Then, I could remember. So, I started praying and meditating in the bathroom! With all the coffee I was drinking, I spent a lot of time with GOD! My sanity has been restored and many promises have come true in my life. But, I still find myself praying and meditating in the shower. It's really nice to have that moment alone with HP (especially with a very active 2 year old in the house all the time!). And, what I've learned through the years is that my HP has moved from being an - out there, over yonder, in heaven, someday - kind of thing to being an -inner feeling of calm and serenity, o.k. here's your hug, love you no matter what - kind of experience, feeling, sense. I still am not really articulate when it comes to my spiritual experience, because so much of it is beyond my college educated ability to put into words. But at least I've been lucky enough to move away from that punishing, beat me up, guilty, old guy on a throne GOD (in deep bass voice over) to a sense of a Spirit of infinite good and love and connection to all things - even the duffus who cut me off on the freewaY! And that, I think is real progress!

Member: Pam
Date: 18 Jan 1999
Time: 04:40:52


(Whisper) Note to Maggie - Typing in ALL CAPS is the equivalent of shouting in cyberspace conversations. Just thought I'd let you know.

Member: Jessie M.
Location: New York, NY
Date: 18 Jan 1999
Time: 17:38:23


I'm Jessie & I'm an alcoholic. This is my first time here. I've enjoyed (gotten a lot out of) reading everyone's comments. This Step & Step 3 are closely related for me. I need to practice turning my will over daily. Not in the sense of handing it over, but flipping it like a pancake, so I can even out the cooking. The side it's been cooking on all my life is burnt to a crisp! So I turn it over & I find balance when I do.

Meditation is something that comes in cycles for me. Maybe I'm just not there yet, but I need to put it down for a while--I can really use it to beat myself up. Like I'm not doing it right, or the way I wish I could, so why try? I do know it's going to be a huge, vital part of my life, just like I knew AA would be in the beginning. I'll get there. Meanwhile, I'll keep praying for God's will to be done in my life, and the grace to accept it. Thanks for being here.

Member: Kathy F
Location: Carlisle,Ia
Date: 18 Jan 1999
Time: 18:58:12


Hi my name is Kathy and I am an alcoholic and a drug addict.

I had a hard time with the part of step 11 that says "praying for the knowledge of his will for you and the power to carry that out"

When I was using I only prayed to ask for help. I grew up in a very disfunctional house hold and I kept asking God to take away the pain and anger - He didn't.

When I sobered up I prayed for the desire to drink to be taken away - but it didn't. Someone told me to read step 11 and then ask God what He wants. I had never thought of that. Once I did my life seemed to get a little better. Rather then saying "God take this away!!!" I'd say "What do you want me to do with it?"

Now, my life is more at peace because I'm not trying to get things my way - rather, I'm taking what is given to me and making it work in my life.

Thanks, Kathy F

Member: Lulu
Location: Midwest
Date: 18 Jan 1999
Time: 19:59:56


What a blessing to have a program to work and this great meeting to read and learn from!! This is my first posting...Step 11..another one I need to work is nice to know that I do not have to conform to any strict religous rules(as I was so dysfunctionally brought up) but that I can seek my own relationship with God and meditate on my time...He has kept me sober for 3 years now...... Thanks for sharing!!

Member: Jodene Alcoholic
Location: OKC
Date: 19 Jan 1999
Time: 15:31:10


Member: Dave L
Location: MI
Date: 19 Jan 1999
Time: 16:27:49


HI! Iam dave & a alchoholic. I try to practice step 11 with dailey meditation through out the day. If I am feeling bad I try and contact my God to find out the problem. When I feel good I try to stay in contact with my God to repeat the feeling

Member: Tom A.
Location: Carlisle, AR
Date: 19 Jan 1999
Time: 16:30:47


My name is Tom A. and I am an alcoholic, who is sober today by the grace of God and the teaching and fellowship we have come to know as Alcoholic's Anonymous. Step 11, has been a vital part of my program since the beginning. I beleive today that prayer is my talking to God and meditation is my listening to God. It also suggests that this is a conscious contact and it deals with knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry it out. For me the most important part of that Step is the italicized portion "as we understood him." Also I have another definition for meditation that has helped me it is simply: "meditation is man's/woman's love affair with God." I thank all who shared in Staying Cybers 12&12 meeting this week. I love you all!

God Bless - Tom A.

Member: Leo R
Location: Hamilton, ON
Date: 19 Jan 1999
Time: 21:24:59


Hi. I'm Leo, a recovered alcoholic. (81/8/28).

Step 11 can be very daunting. The key phrase for me is " as we (I) understood (uderstand) Him.

Coming into the program I had a very firm belief in a Higher Power. This belief has not changed. Early in the program I was confronted with the many thoughts and concepts of others. I would listen to them and would think I was going to fail because my concept did not fit with theirs. It was only after some period of time that I realized that my relationship to my HP was my own.

Once I took ownership of that thought, I was able to have some measure of success in "spiritual progression".

To anyone new or struggling, keep faith and search for your truth.

Member: Sue G.
Location: Washington
Date: 19 Jan 1999
Time: 23:42:51


Hi: I'm Sue, alcoholic. Make a conscious contact with God. Well I remember trying to make contact with God daily, but it was most often in a near unconscious state as I begged to stop drinking and vowed through tears and puke to never do this again. I remember the first time I heard someone in a meeting say they turned things over to God, but had a problem because of taking it back. What a concept and I could see how that applied to me. The contact was on a "how I want it basis". When I was able to make it throug the day I felt God was helping, but when I took it back at night I felt he had abandoned me again. Praying for his will for me and for strength to do it has manifested his will for me in sobriety, the strength to not drink. True willingness to let it happen on his terms is a process progressively learned for me and I have much to learn that is for sure, but even a shred of willingness has resulted in a daily reprieve from alcohol. I have to remember that first step in order to know that I am powerless over this matter and therefore it has to be dealt with on a spiritual level, not on my human level. Unlearning things I believed regarding God that I had learned because of religion was a big thing for me. These things actually hindered a spiritual relationship with God. Religious and spiritual are not necessarily synonymous. Probably the most spiritual I ever was is when I was a child skipping along just thanking God for everything, the trees, the rain, anything at all no matter how small and believing without a doubt that God heard it and cared. That is where I am trying to go today, just trying to keep it really simple and real basic. Vaja con Dios and I love ya all, Sue

Member: Bonnie C - 5/30/80
Location: Seattle
Date: 20 Jan 1999
Time: 02:36:11


Hi extended family, bonnie/alcoholic here (((ROOM-HUG))) Step 11- my first prayer, sitting on the couch, beer in one hand, remote in the other, guy says say this prayer if youre hurting, i did, then I said if you're really there take me and make me a productive human being or let me die. One week later I entered my first AA meeting. I have to be honest, I pray more when my life is falling apart. I get more faith when I see the results of the changes. 12 days after i got sober, my mom died, God sent me the only alcoholic chaplin on the base to tell me, without being told i was alcoholic. I left my kids home husb, everything I thought made me who I am. God showed me that I had my priorities all screwed up and my family could actually do better without me for awhile, (kinda started *right sizing* me. i thought they would die without me but we all got stronger for the time we were apart. my life has taken many twists and turns, some not so pleasant, even another marriage and divorce in sobriety, had all my things stolen at 13yrs sober. now how could that be a good thing? that was truly God working in my life, knowing what was good for me, making me feel so threatened in the neighborhood that i was in and making me look else where. I had to move to a diff state, for God can see my big picture, I cant. He has a divine wonderful plan for my life, one that exceeds anything that I could ever want for me. I didnt know what wonderful was until I started accepting the shi- that hit the fan as an opportunity to change in God's way. God has never given me a *gut wrenching* pain without there being a miracle attached to it, from my first day of sobriety. The pain that I have had has only been opportunities to grow and change. Not that I like it when I'm going thru it but today I know that there is direction on the other end of a problem. like I was only going to spend 6months up here, everytime I went to leave I had to have a head or engine put in my car. the last time he broke it was the day that I said ok God, I wont leave now why do You want me to stay. that nite a friend took me home from an AA function cause my car was in the shop and he kissed me, that was over a yr ago, we are still dating and will probably get married, if it be Gods will. had the car been running, this self sufficient alky wouldn't have gotten that kiss. plus I would have never been introduced to the web, since this was my daughters idea a couple yrs ago & met all of you. God can see my big picture so when stuff happenes today, I kinda get excited and look for the miracle. prayer and meditation leads to faith, trust, love and a friendship with God who loves me enuf to let me hurt and grow. thank God for AA and thank AA for my God. Dear God please bless all who venture here, love and hugs, bon ==

Member: John K
Location: Santa Clara, CA
Date: 20 Jan 1999
Time: 03:16:54


Hi, my name is John and I'm an alcoholic. Thanks to everyone for all the great perspectives on step 11. There is a f2f 11th step meeting in Palo Alto, CA on Wednesday nights that has a nice approach to the discussion/experience of this step.

The meeting begins with a five-minute silent meditation, candlelit and truly silent. Then a gentle bell rings and everyone picks up the copy of the Prayer of Saint Francis that sits on the table in front of them or next to them on the bench. We all read the prayer in unison, enjoying the true unity of the moment.

Then the guest speaker talks about their spiritual path and spiritual experiences or awakening in the program. Discussion from the group follows, always focused on things spiritual (could be going back to school or changing the oil; it's all about the conscious contact}.

This format is very attractive to someone like me, who has a million-mile-a-minute mind and can't sit still to save my life. Once again, we can do together what we cannot do alone.

This group is called the 11th Step Group, but the meeting is referred to as the "meditation meeting" or, less reverently, the "levitation group."

In any case, it's one of my favorite formats, and a nice way to ease into meditation the AA way.

Again, I appreciate all the thoughtful comments and I'm glad to have found this group. I'm a little concerned that the photo page is in violation of our public anonymity tradition, but I trust that its location is pretty well confidential. Whoever is in charge of that site, would you consider a password-protected entry page, based on a password that could be emailed to interested members?

That's enough out of me. Thanks.

John K, Santa Clara

Member: WIP
Location: Pennsylvania
Date: 20 Jan 1999
Time: 06:51:30


I like the idea that “ conscious contact” is the same as listening to your conscious….

I am going through a period of extreme change, at 18 years of sobriety. I have never been so confused. This meeting has helped me to remember to quiet down and listen to my conscious.

When really beaten up, I will go to my knees and pray for direction. Inevitably , the phone will ring or someone will show up. I do not believe that these are mere coincidences.

My self centered behavior is usually fear driven. Not being of great balance, I change everything all at once. I need so much to “ be still and know that I am there” referring of course to God as I understand him.

“Farther, how can I best serve the…” is probably a good starting point for me. How can I turn all of this turmoil into a blessing that will help others?

My spiritual sponsor has helped me a great deal. Having been through similar times, he usually just grins and says that Gods Plan for me is already all in place and that I just need to Let Go and enjoy the ride.

I often think of a very large herd of cattle being led down a chute. I need to go with the flow instead, I’ll be the cow that wants to turn around and go back up the line, getting clobbered along the way. I truly just need to Let Go and Let God. And listen for the “little voice” along the way. I have been led to a life far greater than anything I could have imagined by not drinking and working the Traditions and Steps in this life. Why, do I, continue to trust my will?

EGO… Ease God Out. I need to think of the needs of others before my own. When I place this “ Conscious Contact” Ahead of everything, away we go!

Emmett Fox calls it “The Golden Key”.. Definition is: Stop thinking about your difficulty and think about God instead! The result will always be and has always been Harmony and Happiness.

I love AA. I love this world wide meeting. May God bless everyone that finds this spot in Cyber Space!

Member: Kent H.
Location: lovingitsoberinTN
Date: 20 Jan 1999
Time: 14:11:33


Thank you, everyone, for reminding me of the importance of actively working this step every day. Peace and Love to you all.

Member: Maggie K.
Location: Vernon B.C.
Date: 20 Jan 1999
Time: 21:09:12


Hi everyone Maggie here AA. Thanking God for another sober day. Thanks Pam for the whisper...showed my infancy again by yelling LOL . My son informed me about the capped letters too. Not much to say .Happy 24 to all. Love in service Maggie

Member: Janice M
Location: TN
Date: 20 Jan 1999
Time: 21:42:36


You got my favorite step! Sought through prayer and meditation to improve my consious contact with God as I understand him praying only for his will for me and the power to carry it out. To me this is the growth of my spirituality when I crawled into these rooms I had no God I thought I was an athiest or at least agnostic I used a tree as my HP very slowely the tree became a face and a god of my understanding. To reach the 11th step I have to have worked the other 10 to the best of my ability. I got here but still had the problem of knowing how to meditate, I had learned how to pray and I have to pray out loud as my alcoholic mind will be a mile down the road making grocery lists and I will just be saying things out of routine. The meditating part for me today is deep breathing and asking my God to come into my life for today this is also done out loud so my mind doesn't run away with me. I breath in Gods will and exhail my will. This works for me. I know when I am in Gods will, my day goes well and I can always start it over if it doesn't. MY WILL is SELF WILL and absolutly nothing goes the way I want it. Hitting my knees asking for Gods help for his will in my life is the only way I can go. If I do not do this I will drink again. What a miracle for this alcoholic to have such a wonderful God in her life. This serenity and peace that I get from doing his will is what I looked for in the bottom of every bottle this is how I wanted the booze to make me feel but it did the opposite. For me to drink today is not Gods will for me, he enjoys seeing me Happy Joyfull and Free and If all I have to do is ask for his help I will keep on asking every 24.

Member: Jack B.
Location: Lewes, DE
Date: 20 Jan 1999
Time: 22:59:17


Hi! I'm Jack and I'm an alcoholic. My home group is an 11th Step Meeting and this group has been most helpfull to me. My experience has been that to achieve any involvement is a study of the 11th Step requires a committment and dedication to this study that is indeed formitable. Let me add that I have found that the rewards of becoming involved in 11th Step Study are beyond description and well worth the effort you expend. Again, my experience has been that there is nothing to fear from trying to improve ones concious contact with God as we understand Him. As long as I can keep an "Open Mind" about this adventure and listen with respect to others who share in this search I know I shall be rewarded. I heartily recomend trying this step. It's wonderful! Love to all, Jack B.

Member: Terri O
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Date: 21 Jan 1999
Time: 10:42:50


Hi my name is Terri and I am an alcoholic.

Step 11 is one of my favorites too - in theory. In practice, I have not been sober very long (8 months), and it is very hard for me to concentrate still, also I get confused easily.

But I am trying to to do this every day as prescribed - on knees in morning and before bed, reading same daily mediation book as my sponsor, reading pages 84-88 each day, trying to see where I went wrong yesterday, asking for help today.

Well I attribute my 8 miraculous months of sobriety to this daily practice of "on knees". I am looking forward to improved conscious contact, I believe what sober AA members tell me will happen because the evidence is before my eyes.

I am very grateful to all of you for your comments here, helped me very much (some of them I copied into an 11th step guide I am making for myself).


Member: julie p
Location: madison wi
Date: 22 Jan 1999
Time: 09:14:52


the eleventh step is where i learn how to live. by practising on a daily basis, both meditation and prayer, i am released into a new realm of thought. not that i always appreciate the higher level of thought. but it is getting better. one thing i realize is that i have always tried to put the cart before the horse when it comes to the steps. i need to remember to put first things first. for a long time i tried to have concious contact with God, although i had not made a decision to surrender to Him. today i need to keep a constant tab on where i am in relation to God. if i am not right with with god----i am not right with any thing. so, prayer and meditation are the keys to a continous relationship with God. i,m not always in a place of surrender, but i keep coming back! peace

Member: Rick         J.
Location: Waterloo,Ontario, Can.
Date: 22 Jan 1999
Time: 10:21:13


Hi y'all my name is Rick J. an alcoholic in Canada. I really take comfort in the fact that no matter how far, or how long I walk in the oppisite direction of GOD, all I have to do is STOP turn around and GOD is right there with me. All I have to do is be willing to make a start. This is a GREAT COMFORT for me. Thanks for listening Rick J.

Member: Corinne B.
Location: Camino, CA
Date: 22 Jan 1999
Time: 21:06:14


Hello Room! I'm Corinne & I'm an Alcoholic here, there & everywhere!

Just wanted to pop in and say I'm trying to keep up in here with reading and can only post a little on this step, based on past sobriety, not too much on what I've got going on right now with only 19 days, you know?

I had a real hard time with this step because the word meditation had me blocked. I used to live with a TMer back in 1974-5 and had such a resentment about his 20 minutes of "Ohms" in the morning! Hmmm.. Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure I did a 4th step on that, but won't hurt to look at that again when the time comes! I also have an overly-active racing mind thing that is hard to turn off without a meditation tape, which I was introduced to about a year or so ago; unfortunately I was not sober at the time, & never gained full use or benefit from them, but I still have them & someday the time will come when I'll try those again.

I've prayed at times just to be willing to be WILLING to be willing, and that sure does help. I also used to ask God to remove my negative thoughts towards others and replace them with anything else, and that works. I first started to believe in the power of prayer when I had insomnia during my first few months of brand new AA sobriety. I asked God to remove my sleeplessness because I sure wouldn't be of any use to any one if I hadn't had any sleep! Next thing I knew, I was waking up in the morning feeling refreshed! Must have worked! I've still used that prayer over the years, sober & unsober! I think that having had such a simple connection to God through the years even After I left the program is exactly what eventually led me back in. Whatever did it, it had something to do with prayer, because a whole lot of folks have been praying for me for a long time these past 6.5 yrs! Thanks to them, God, and AA, I'm back & I plan on staying sober - ODAAT! Corinne B.

Member: Caryn
Location: PA
Date: 23 Jan 1999
Time: 09:03:13


Hi everyone! A lot of great stuff has been said on this topic. Thank you Shirley with 10 years for your honesty. After 10 years, I am finally willing to practice meditation on a regular basis. I struggled and refused and said "I can't because my mind is always racing". My sponsor would constantly remind me that that's what our minds do - they create thoughts. I am learning that meditation is just bringing the awareness back to the here and now. The mind drifts, I bring it back. It drifts, I bring it back. I spent a lot of time living in my head, running on my power (trying to convince myself that if it was God's will I would meditate!!! - my sponsor never bought that one for a minute!!!!!) I love this step and I finally feel connected to God, to my soul, to other people (today - who knows how I'll feel tomorrow!) "Be still and know that I am God" is my favorite reminder that a power greater than myself is here. All I have to do is pay attention.

Member: The Group
Location: Bismarck, ND
Date: 23 Jan 1999
Time: 11:13:36


Hi everyone. We are 12 people in treatment, some of us going to our first meeting. One of us even thought HP was Highway Patrol. We've got a lot to learn. A comment from one member is "What do I do now for fun ? " To be in a meeting with someone from Australia wakes us up to a realization we're sure not alone. We'll check back next week. Wish us the best. Thanks for being there.

Member: fancnanc
Location: WA
Date: 23 Jan 1999
Time: 11:42:59


hi everyone! For me step 11 is the quiet step that gets me in touch with my quiet side. Acceptance to me is accepting what is happening is exactly what is suppose to happen in the big plan and when I get out of self and let go and let god miracles do happen and i see them I prayed for someone because i was lonely and my son and 14 month old arrived at my door for help (that is not what i had in mind!) never plan the results someone else is in charge fancnanc