Member: Tracy
Location: Essex, England
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 11:15 AM

Comments

Yep I did and still do. AA isn't enough for my head, alright for my drinking.


Member: Kari
Location:
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 12:58 PM

Comments

Just wanted to say goodbye to everyone. I kind of went off the deep end yesterday and ruined my reputation here. I am just realizing that the message board just isn't for me because I somehow end up sharing way too much information rather than finding a more appopriate outlet like writing in a journal or something. I ended up trashing my husband yesterday on this message board when I didn't mean to and I really love and care for him so much. I am also realizing that I need to work on my time management and that the computer is taking a huge chunk of my life away from me. I have basically traded an alcohol addicition for a message board addicition and I am not going to allow that to happen. Please assume, that I am doing well and that I remained sober because I really do think I will. ((Ethan)) Good luck. Maybe I will pop in every few weeks to see if you are still here and if you are still sober.


Member: Mike W.
Location: Southern Michigan
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 01:16 PM

Comments

Dear Kari>> Balance is the Key>>> you can still give yourself an hour or two a day to you recovery , Meetings and this site are an important part for me>> If I fall short of staying sober, because I've neglected The program, I won't have much time for anything other than myself and my drinking anyway.. Think about it. Your freind >> Mike W.


Member: Bob D.
Location: upstate NY
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 01:28 PM

Comments

Hi to all...just read your post Kari, and I hope you return at least one more time to read this. I fail to see how your reputation is ruined here. No one is any better or any worse than anyone else that uses this board. We all need each other to get things off our chests or we begin to let them sit inside and fester until it becomes too much and we pick up. Please reconsider. I have a big problem with time management also, always trying to keep too many balls in the air at once, or at least I did, and it's something that I have to keep practicing at. There is an excellent book out which I'd like to recommend to you and to anyone else that struggles with this. It's called "The Power of Full Engagement" by Loehr and Schwartz. Basically it tells us that time is a finite quantity, but that energy can be renewed again and again to deal with time's finiteness. Please give it a try. (By the way, I have no stake in the sale of this book, and if it's innappropriate to recommend such things on this site, please let me know. You rush through life, you die tired. Peace and serenity to all.


Member: Pam B
Location: Daytona Beach, FL
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 02:00 PM

Comments

(((Kari))) - When I identified w/being powerless over alcohol - that my life is unmanageable, I suddenly knew that I am no match for the power that alcohol (this disease of alcoholism) has over me. It works in me primarily thru my thinking (this disease centers in the mind) whether I am under the influence or abstaining. I continue creating chaos, jack-pots, impossible situations for myself, harming others, etc etc whenever I am acting out of self-will - then claiming I am some sort of a 'victim'. That is how we alkies are. Powerless over this disease - our lives Unmanageable. That means I have to SURRENDER to that Greater Power & let Him be the Manager of my life because my life is a stressed out mess anytime I decide I can manage it myself. That Greater Power speaks to me thru others who know how to Let Go & Let Him Manage my life & run the show to keep me out of that driver's seat - they show me the way its done. Sponsors - sober AA's living the 12 Steps w/reliance on God as they each may understand God sharing at f2f mtgs, sharing their own ES&H, sharing in one on one fellowship & friendship - to pass on "how it works" to me. This is a "we" program, not an "I" am figuring it out at home alone in front of my computer by my continued self-willed ways. That is what keeps us drinking & keeps us wanting to & needing to. Surrender. Honesty, Open-mindedness & Willing to Surrender & follow the simple instructions - & you'll soon see your entire life & what your average day is like completely turn around when God is the Manager instead of yourself. Prayers w/you. Thanks for letting me share. Pam


Member: Kari
Location:
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 02:59 PM

Comments

Thank you everyone for your comments. When I said that about ruining my reputation here, I was kind of making a joke. As far as surrendering and letting God manage my life. I do believe that overall, that is definitely the answer. However, I believe that individuals do have the power to manage their lives and that God expects us to at least try to manage our affairs, those who don't even try are the ones that are "victims" of this disease and victims in life in general. God helps those who help themselves. This whole AA thing has been a very enlightening experience because what I am seeing is that there is alot of attitude that we are "victims" of this disease, we were somehow chosen to genetically be given this disease, and that we can't control our behavior and it is an excuse when we make bad choices. I just don't buy into the disease model and I feel that people need to take responsibility for their choices. I guess you could say I never made it past the first step -- admitting that I am powerless over alcohol and that my life had become unmanageable. I do believe that I have power over alcohol -- which is that if I know I have a control problem then I need to say no to the first drink to begin with. I make the choice to go to meetings. I have to believe in myself and God that he will help give me the courage and strength to say no to that first drink. This will be my last post. I encourage anyone that is using this site to get or stay sober --- go out and meet people whether it be at meetings or in your community, because sitting at home on the computer is not a life. Two weeks of this is about all I can take even if it is only an hour a day on the computer. To me that is an hour too much.


Member: Matt R.
Location: Frisco, TX
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 03:20 PM

Comments

Hi all, I have not been in touch lately ... just wanted to let you know I am alive and well ;-) I have been dealing with all kinds of things in life, particularly my marriage ... we are separated, and I want it back ! It is nice to be able to deal with lifes problems with a CLEAR mind, and see it thru CLEAR eyes !


Member: Tracy
Location: Essex, England
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 05:19 PM

Comments

KARI~ You got no worrys yet gal, you wanna see what I do to my reputation over on the coffee pot LOL! Seems I have to apologise to people every couple of days or so. Yes I am addicted to message boards, but one step at a time. If god led you to this site then use it.


Member: Kerry C
Location: TX(kerryctx@hotmail.com)
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 05:36 PM

Comments

Hi Kerry here an alcoholic. There are many varied opinions in AA regarding treatment centers and phychiatrists...etc. I try to stay in the big Book whenever possible so I take my guidance on this matter from Chapter 9 The Family Afterwards. "But this does not mean that we disregard human health measures. God has abundantly supplied this world with fine doctors, psychologists, and practitioners of various kinds. Do not hesitated to take your health problems to such persons. Most of them give freely of themselves, that their fellows may enjoy sound minds and bodies. Try to remember that though God has wrought miracles among us, we should never belittle a good doctor or psychiatrist. Their services are often indispensable in treating a newcomer and in following his case afterward."


Member:
Location:
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 07:02 PM

Comments

Kari, I never post on this site; have only read the information and tried to learn and educate myself on this addiction. I read your e-mail and it brought tears to my eyes. I stumbled across this site because I was trying to get help. I e-mailed a couple of people and initially was very optimistic and within a couple of weeks never heard from them again. To go on this site was my initial step for help. My spouse was thrilled that I took that step only to be dissappointed in the end. To the people on this site; I hope you realize the impact you do have on the people that do decide to converse with you. There is a lot of individuals that are unable for whatever their reasons to attend meetings and look at other avenues for help than being face to face in a meeting. I would never offer to help someone and turn my back on anyone. I am a believer in God and totally agree with you Kari that alcohol is not necessarily a disease but a choice. Cancer is a disease/ alcohol is a choice and a decision that people make. People don't choose to have cancer but they choose to have a drink. I hope that you stay sober Kari and make the right choice. I applaud you for speaking up.


Member: AZbill
Location: az-bill@mindspring.com
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 09:27 PM

Comments

HI Bill here, alcoholic from Arizona. Seek professional help. You bet!!! If I have a medical problem, even those that are alcohol related. I go to a doctor. If I have emotional problems I will to to a psychiatrist. If I need money, I go to a bank, If I am in trouble with the law, I go to a lawyer. I do not take these issues to unqualified alcoholics. I do not lay 4th and 5th Steps on the open tables at AA meetings. If I have a drinking problem I will take that to AA. A few of the many things AA does not do is practice medicine, psychiatry, or nursing. AA does not offer religious services. Does not offer counseling. These are professional services most of which require licensing and it is against the law to practice without such license. Individual members may be involved in some of these activities on a personal basis, but not as a part of their membership in AA. Love you all, Thanks for being here for me, az-bill@mindsring.com


Member: SHAWN M.
Location: MASS
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 10:22 PM

Comments

HEY FOLKS,SHAWN HERE.ALCHY.LOOKING AT MY LIFE AND WHAT DRINKING HAS HELPED ME DO TO IT I SHOULD HAVE NO PROBLEM PUTTING THE BOTTLE DOWN FOR GOOD.UNFORTUNATLY,THE ADDITION HAS WORKED IT'S WAY SO DEEP INTO MY HEAD THAT I FEEL I SHOULD SPEND SOME TIME ON A LEATHER SOFA.A/A I DON'T THINK IS ENOUGH FOR ME.TO MANY ISSUES,TO MUCH TO BE LET GO OF.THATS MY PROBLEM.I CAN'T LET GO AND LET GOD LEAD ME.I ASK MYSELF WHY BUT I AINT GOT NO ANSWER.IT SUCKS.SO TO ANYONE WHO THINKS THEY NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP CERTAINLY SHOULD GET IT.WHY SUFFER MORE THAN YOU NEED TO. MAYBE IT'S NOT THE ANSWER BUT AT LEAST YOU'LL KNOW YOUR TRYING. THANX SHAWN M.


Member: Facts are needed here
Location: Not "I Thinks" or Theorize
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 10:31 PM

Comments

anyone who has a choice over whether to drink or not is NOT an alcoholic (or only fooling self). . . alcoholics drink to excess - but not all who drink excessively are alcoholics. We don't need your theories to encourage those who are alcoholics to keep on doing it their way till dead or kill someone. Fact: Alcoholism is a Disease that is Fatal & Progressive.


Member:
Location:
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 10:51 PM

Comments

AT LEAST SOMEBODY HAS A GRIP ON IT.


Member:
Location:
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 11:16 PM

Comments

"DESIRE"TO QUIT,NOT JUST CHOICE.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 11:38 PM

Comments

hi Diane here day 124, well today is a good day for me, life is well I feel like God is finally blessing me for not drinking. Now if I need a Doctor I go to one so case closed on that subject. Let's get back to helping each other not drink or maybe we just need to vent a little so what is wrong with that? I think when we get more honest with each other then it makes this site worth it. If we say things we think later we should not have said well big deal, we all have the same problem and I pray we can all grow together in a sober World. Diane


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 27, 2003
Time: 11:44 PM

Comments

one small thought to the capital lock folks? There are people in this World it's not me but there are folks who have to use a program to read for them cause they are blind or they can't see well, and if you use all Capital keys when you type that makes the program yell at them is what I've been told and you know I hate reading all capitals it's just not cool. So please don't Capital lock if you are not yelling at us, also in computer world that means you are shouting at us,,, thanks,, I don't think you did it on purpose but I hope now that you know you won't use your Capital lock key to write on this board


Member: Kelly M
Location: NH
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 01:59 AM

Comments

Diane... Your a hoot! Capitol lock people. I would rather read all lower case any day. I'm with you that if you need a doctor go to a doctor. AZbill nails it that when left up to unqualified alcoholics you can hear a myraid of untruths. I have heard your out of program for smoking ciggarettes for Gods sake! My sponsor said that if it is not in the Big Book don't worry about it. I take medication as prescribed by my doctor. I think us alkies can complicate the simplest of things. There is a girl that nods out in meetings after she comes from the Methadone clinic. People say she is not sober but in fact she is over a year sober. If the clinic doctor administers this stuff to her she is just as sober as me on my Lipitor. It is really easy to get sidetracked debating what is sober and what is not. I try not to get derailed in these discussions because they will always be at the meetings and they take me away from my real purpose which is working my recovery. To the lady that quit AA because someone did not return your e-mail, that is NOT AA. You are practicing the easier softer way and found it does not work. Alcohol is a choice? When your not an alcoholic it is. Why post that on an AA board? If your not an alcoholic then why are you posting here? I'm a drunk in AA TO SAVE MY LIFE. If I wasn't maybe I would try TTA or CDA, Tea Totalers Anonymous or Controlled Drinking Anonymous!!! Help! I think I'm stark raving sober because I'm really getting quite a laugh and silly over this. I need some ZZZ's. If we want a life second to none we don't pick up a drink one day at a time, we work the program as it is outlined in the Big Book, we go to meetings, clean house and help another alcoholic. It is that simple. Enough from the peanut gallery tonight. Kelly ;)


Member: Carrie
Location: Los Angeles
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 02:53 AM

Comments

I have yet to meet a person who couldn't use a little therapy and many people i know could benefit from physchiatric drugs. It's a personal choice and every person has the right to explore those options. Some in AA have a misconception about medications prescribed by doctors, talk to your doctor and tell him/her that you are an alcoholic and go from there. When I first came into the program I had a woman tell me to flush my prozac down the toilet. I did and actually quite quickly went into a severe depression. My sponcer told me to call the doctor, get another evalutation and be honest about my alcoholism. I did and it was confirmed that I suffer from clinical depression and was re-prescribed the medication. It's hard enough to stay sober under normal circumstances, it can be nearly impossible if you are suffering from a mental disorder/chemical imbalance/emotional disturbance. We have to treat our mind, body and soul - leave one out and you are headed for trouble. I am not suggesting of taking medication or therapy in place of AA, but they can be very usefull tools to help you in your recovery. God bless.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 10:54 AM

Comments

Kelly what is Lipitor? and I agree with you too Carrie maybe I need to see a Doctor for I do get some days of depression. I'm Diane and I'm 125 days sober and to Kari who says she is not coming back here, hey when I was first sober I got my feelings hurt really easy and on this site see it's just that I believe you are new at being sober so stick with us if you can. I think this site is very helpful and you don't have to devote 2 hours a day to this site just pop on once or twice a day and post and then that also puts you in line so you can see where you stop reading for the next time you decide to pop online. Heck just cut out some TV programs like I do. Who needs all that boring TV anyway this is what I do and I get plenty done, and if you get a mean comment just take what helps you and leave the rest. Remember Kari we all have this disease so we all will at one time or another say something that we should not have said love in Christ,,,Diane


Member: Kari
Location:
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 11:38 AM

Comments

Hey, I've just popped in this morning to see if Ethan has been around and I cannot believe how twisted around this has gotten. The reason I am not going to post anymore is not because I got my feelings hurt. In fact, everyone here as been very supportive (other than Tom who told me to stop whining). Many of you said very positive and encouraging things to me. I think I am being mixed up with the person that said they didn't come back because someone didn't return their email. I am not going to be on here anymore, because I have realized that message boards just aren't for me. It was taking too much time away from my true priorities which are attending meetings, reading the Big Book and being with my daughter. Just wanted to clear this up, because somehow it has been turned around that people think that I am leaving because someone said something wrong to me. Geeze, I'm not that sensitive! I think Diane is right --- get back to supporting each other in staying sober. As far as the things I said about having power and choice over alcohol, I totally understand that those in late stage alcoholism have a disease and are in such a vicious cycle with their brain chemistry that they have no power or choice. But I guess my point was that most of us that are on this site, made a choice to stop drinking at some point, otherwise how did we get here in the first place. Yes, we surrender to God, but we make alot of choices along the way too. For example, the choice to seek professional help (our topic this week). I'm afraid to say anything else on this site, because everything I say is getting twisted around into something negative. I am a very positive person who was trying to contribute something positive to this site, but everything has just snowballed. I should add, that I had contacted technical support because I wanted one of my posts to be deleted. After the issue was taken care of, I received additional emails from him later which indicate that he is now lurking. That just creeped me out because I don't really have anonymity with that person since he has my email address.


Member: John R
Location: Paris
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 12:00 PM

Comments

Ten days today! My little Big Book is my constant companion! My HP is the Spirit of the Universe


Member: Jane C.
Location: Alaska
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 01:26 PM

Comments

Jane C..an alcoholic...Getting therapy is the best thing to do... especially if there is no one to talk to..when I first relocateed to this new place..I thought I was just about going bananas...there was no one here that I could share a thing with...the day the truck came with my STUFF..I just sat down and cried when the movers left...where do I start with all the unpacking.. I did the only thing I could do..I checked the yellow pages and found a Mental Health Clinic and CALLED.. I wasted no time...hysterical on the phone they wanted to see me immediately..I didn't think I was all that desperate..it was already past midnight...they asked if I would be OK through the night..I said yes..they saw me the next day.. BElieve me,it was knowing that there was help waiting for me out there that helped me so much..and I made it through the nite OK..and saw a counselor for a few months and have been pretty much OK..but for the alcoholism...GET HELP..if you need it...It's a God send...also I truly believe that we do have a disease...I don't think I ever once said to myself that "I want to drink until I am lost in the baottle"..or that I want to get drunk..all I ever wanted was a nice drink or two or even maybe three and then put the bottle away...it rarely happened..I think the proof of the disease is that we CAN"T.. and don't know how too put the cork in the bottle..it's day 15 for me and everyday I tell myself GET TO A MEETING..I hope that soon I have the courage to get there... God Bless you all..and have a healthy, happy, sober day...


Member: dry one
Location:
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 02:20 PM

Comments

Professional help I know I need it.When I first went to AA I was told I had to change.It wasn't easy but I did I was told if it will make you drink don't do it.My life is very hard the way I think today.There are alot of things I don't do because I'll drink.I don't work for one I can't play the game the working game.I have a hard time trusting people it only thats one nut to wreck my day.I'v been to a psychiatrist for my problems he put me on porzac.I began to feel good so good that I had a relapse an I began drinking 18 yrs. sober back to day one that was 8 yrs.I'm what AA calls a dry drunk I can unstand what they mean by that today.But at the time I just didn't drink I didn't know I was going to make it for 18. Thats all I knew is I didn't want to drink anymore and I wasn't going to any aa meetings.It just not for me the only thing I was going to change was I'm not going to drink. If I drank I would be back at those aa meetings I just couldn't deal with that. I didn't drink but I didn't think right either.Everybodys on their own how can I say this if a building was on fire everybody is on their own.I would never help anybody your on your own. I was a very angry person who didn't want help and I wasn't going to give anyone any help your on your own. Its not the way to be but I just couldn't help myself from thinking that way. Very angry I would say to myself life sucks then you die.But life is what you make of it I guess if you want something bad enought you'll go after it.All I can say is its not just your drinking its the way of thinking.Sometimes you need people to show you the way.To your problems


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 03:16 PM

Comments

Kari just change your name in here a lot of folks in the past have changed there name anyway if they are lurking they are just reading to be sure we all behave lol sorry if I took you wrong Kari I thought you was upset but now you say you where not upset. The thing with your husband is not our business but if sharing helps then what is the problem? Just don't give out any personal information and you will be fine is what I think anyway but I'm sure no shrink just a alkie trying to recover hope you come back and keep this site alive


Member: Rich
Location: NE
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 03:54 PM

Comments

Day 12 sober. I'm going to have to see my doc about changing my meds because I've been depressed since I stopped drinking. If I continue to be depressed, what's the point of staying sober.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 04:51 PM

Comments

yes Rich if you feel too depressed see your Doctor and get some help


Member: ''@@''
Location:
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 05:12 PM

Comments

Courage is very important. Like a muscle, it is strengthened by use. Ruth Gordon All of us fear the unfamiliar at times; and it's nothing to be ashamed of to occasionally feel frightened by everyday events. We can still forget that God is always with us and, thus, allow fear to take over. We're learning in recovery, though, that we can empower ourselves through the magic of belief. Acting as if we feel that extra bit of courage and that we sense God's presence protecting us can dissipate our fears and bring us new confidence. In doing this, we will gradually come to know the inner resources God has given us. The more we acknowledge our courage; the more it becomes a working part of our life. We often unnecessarily complicate matters by thinking we have to face things by ourselves. We forget that our spiritual program offers us ready relief from the terror of feeling alone. God offers us the strength and courage to meet each challenge. We only have to accept. I will remember God's presence today and discover the courage to face my fears.


Member:
Location:
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 05:15 PM

Comments

Courage is very important. Like a muscle, it is strengthened by use. Ruth Gordon All of us fear the unfamiliar at times; and it's nothing to be ashamed of to occasionally feel frightened by everyday events. We can still forget that God is always with us and, thus, allow fear to take over. We're learning in recovery, though, that we can empower ourselves through the magic of belief. Acting as if we feel that extra bit of courage and that we sense God's presence protecting us can dissipate our fears and bring us new confidence. In doing this, we will gradually come to know the inner resources God has given us. The more we acknowledge our courage; the more it becomes a working part of our life. We often unnecessarily complicate matters by thinking we have to face things by ourselves. We forget that our spiritual program offers us ready relief from the terror of feeling alone. God offers us the strength and courage to meet each challenge. We only have to accept. I will remember God's presence today and discover the courage to face my fears.


Member: Monica
Location: Mnlps
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 05:43 PM

Comments

Day 1 ... when I leave work, in my car, at home, dinner with FRIENDS! what do you guys do from 5 till bed time? Just -1- day at a time? Right?


Member: Bill
Location: Sober at Noon
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 07:11 PM

Comments

Good Bye already KARI ! Your obviously not even grateful for what this site has done for you or that many of us are not here to listen to your whining! There's a topic and it's not you Kari. Get Out and Grow Up!


Member: Avid
Location: Lurker
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 07:40 PM

Comments

bj--Bill above---You're an asshole!!!!!


Member: SHAWN M.
Location: MASS
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 08:36 PM

Comments

shawn here,(drunk)sorry about the cap locks folks,i did not mean to be yelling at you guys. anyway i also am out of here.i have to go figure out whether or not i qualify as an ALCHOLIC and should be useing this board.there are to many TEXT BOOK drunks here for my liking. later shawn (DAWG) M.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 11:39 PM

Comments

sorry Shawn I was not saying that about the locks to be rude I was just trying to make you realize about people who can't see, they use a program that talks for them and if someone uses all capital locks it yells at them it's a talking voice is what I heard. I'm so sorry I upset you Shawn please forgive me


Member: SHAWN M.
Location: MASS
Date: July 28, 2003
Time: 11:59 PM

Comments

shawn(alchoholic) diane, i'm not upset about the cap lock thing,actualy i would like to thank you for setting me straight with that.i really don't know much about these dang computers.i'm just trying to stay dry and found i can write here what i don't always have the balls to say when i go to a meeting.anyway, it is somebody else here that gets me fired up.i really was not barking at you.


Member: E
Location:
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 12:24 AM

Comments

Hi all. Day 15 coming to an end. ((Kari)) I'll miss you. You're ability to articulate your thoughts and emotions and willingness to share much about your life has made my experience on this site much more meaningful. The way I see this board is that it's just another tool to use to help us in our journey through recovery - I hope you'll continue to choose to use it from time to time. If just to say hello. ((Diane)) and ((Jane C)) Thanks for having the courage to share the events of your life and dependency on God - it helps me tremendously. You're in my prayers. ((Shawn)) Just as I hope Kari keeps coming back, I hope you also stick around. You add a lot to this place for me. ((''@@'')) That's great stuff. So easy to forget when the going gets tough, but so powerful, so magical, when we remember to accept His offer. Time to do what I'm learning to look forward to at the end of each day (instead of one more brew) - go crack open the Bible and see what He has to say to me tonight. Thanks for being here for me.


Member: Ethan T
Location: MA
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 12:28 AM

Comments

Yeah, that one above ("E")is me. My trigger finger was a little ahead of me. Can you tell I really AM looking forward to climbing into the sack ASAP and reading the Bible? My how things are changing. Who woulda figured...


Member: Mark
Location: NY
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 01:04 AM

Comments

Ethan, I deeply appreciate your sharing that about the bible---beautiful, thanks man!!!!!!1


Member: Mark
Location: NY
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 01:06 AM

Comments

Ethan, I deeply appreciate your sharing that about the bible---beautiful, thanks man!!!!!!1


Member: Carlc
Location: nm
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 02:34 AM

Comments

If you have a toothache prayer is good, on your way to the dentist.


Member: Theresa
Location: Canada
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 08:38 AM

Comments

I got through day one, which isn't a hard day for me and today shouldn't be a problem, but here in Canada we have a long weekend coming up and that will be a challange to get through. Espically when you have no plans and haven't thought ahead. One day at a time as they say. Hope you all have a great day.


Member: Tom
Location: NY
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 09:30 AM

Comments

Day 44, still sober and thankful for it. Kari, please accept my apologies for my comments last week. It was innapropriate for me to post something negative to you or anyone else. I think it came across harsher than I intended, but regardless, I'm sorry. One of the things I like about this site is that it allows us to be open and share our thoughts and feelings about things that we might not be able to at home or with friends. Regardless of where anyone is at in their dealings with alcohol, this site has only one criteria; The desire not to drink. It's what got me here and it's what keeps me coming back. Best of luck to all.


Member: SEEK
Location: Professional help
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 10:07 AM

Comments

Hi after reading all of these comments I can only say you all need Professional help


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 12:45 PM

Comments

lol Seek that cute and we are getting help on this board some of us have to work harder then others but we all work together for the same goal which is to stay sober. Thanks Ethan for the hello, I thought that was you hehe. Also glad I did not run you off Shawn was surely not my intent. Today is day 126 sober. My Son took off last night never to return so I pray he made it to work. Then I open my Bible which told me to trust so I will trust God is taking care of him


Member: fred
Location: in.
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 01:02 PM

Comments

I was trying not to judge this site but it does seem to be more of a chatroom and not an aa meeting


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 02:22 PM

Comments

fred sorry you want to judge this site but it has helped my recovery and sometimes I post more, (when I need too) maybe if you tell us about your recovery just for a start? How many days clean and or sober are you Fred? Our meetings last a week at a time so of course why would we talk about going to a Doctor for a full week? I have other issues I need to discuss like my Son. I get tempted to just throw the towel in and drink when my problems get to large to handle but this site helps me with good suggestions I have got from folks who have a lot longer in then I have, this is a early meeting for people new at recovery and it says we can post more or I think I read that if you want more of a meeting click on the link 12X12 meeting at the top. But for me I am very new only a little over 4 months so I stick to this room


Member: Kari
Location:
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 03:15 PM

Comments

((Ethan)) Thanks :) I'll miss you! ((Tom)) No worries, all is forgiven. ((Bill)) Just wanted to make sure that you knew that I was not the no namer that called you an "asshole" right after your post. I admit that your harsh words nearly sent me running for a bottle but then I decided that the only people I would be hurting is myself and my little girl. After all, the best revenge is to live well, so I spent the day at a travel agency instead of with my bottle. So here's to you Bill: God Bless you, God Bless you, God Bless you, God Bless you, God Bless you, God bless you, God Bless you, God Bless you. May you live a sober life and prosper throughout. I won't be lurking anymore after this post because I will be getting out and growing up as you put it, Bill. As a matter of fact, I booked a trip for me and baby to take my 82 year old grandma to Maui next week. We are going to spend time together and she is going to tell me about my grandfather's 30 years of alcoholism followed by his 40 years of sobriety before his sober death. Bye, gotta go buy a new bikini.


Member: fred
Location:
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 03:27 PM

Comments

Diane sorry you feel like that please don't get mad.But there is a TOPIC to an AA meeting "I" think there is a TOPIC and we should stay in the TOPIC in this site. I see alot of people just talking about everything and anything. SORRY "I" feel this is more like a chatroom than AA meeting


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 04:01 PM

Comments

I'm not upset Fred you are and if we need to talk on this site this is probably what we will do it's all about recovery remember? how many days Fred? I'm 126 days sober today how about you honey? Oh I forgot the topic if you need help get it case closed


Member: nella
Location: uk
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 04:05 PM

Comments

Ask pam she knows evrything. just asks her..


Member: Libby
Location: London
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 04:07 PM

Comments

You can say anything you want here, doesny matter if someone likes it or noe. Yea everybody could use professionaal help specialy alkies and druggies......


Member: Kelly M
Location: NH
Date: July 29, 2003
Time: 05:58 PM

Comments

Hi Diane, Funny this doesn't feel like a chat room to me but a supportive place. I discuss more than the topics but anyone with less than a year can post more than once here. Here is the Early Sobriety header above... The Early Sobriety Meeting of Staying Cyber was created so that those new to sobriety would have a comfortable place to ask any question that they might have. Each week a topic will be chosen from a suggested list to start the meeting. Those with less than one year may share on that or any other topic as often as they wish. Whether it be answering a question or sharing, we ask others - those with more than one year - to limit their shares to once per week and to keep that share to less than 300 words so that all may have an opportunity to participate in the 12th step work.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Sorry, I did not get back to you on Lipitor sooner. Have been getting a game plan for my move. I posted about it on last weeks page. Glad you are feeling better and I know you are concerned about your Son. Nothing is worth drinking over and it won't change it or make it any better. Hang in there kiddo. Here is the link for Lipitor: http://my.webmd.com/content/drugs/3/4046_1435?bn=Lipitor >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Have a nice night ((ALL)) gotta run to my Step Study and see my sponsor. Peace. Kelly


Member: Carrie
Location: Los Angeles
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 03:28 AM

Comments

Diane, can I suggest you try Alanon as well as AA? I know many people in AA who find Alanon just as important to their recovery as AA. Where I live we have "Double Winners" meetings, it's an AA/Alanon meeting - you could kill two birds with one stone : )


Member: Jane C.
Location: Alaska
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 03:51 AM

Comments

Jane C.>>Alcoholic...(RICH) the purpose of staying sober is so that we don't go mad or die...then with sobriety we can hope to have a somewhat joyous and happy life..it all takes time, but God will be there for you if you let Him in... For depression sometimes all we need is talk therapy..it's worked for me in the past and I've always believed that it is an important part of getting to know ourselves better... sometimes just through counseling you'll find that you are talking about things that you never knew were causing a problem in your life..there are all kinds of professionl help available..it's just a matter of finding what's right for each persons problems...


Member: "@@"
Location:
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 07:03 AM

Comments

Anger ANGER--A DANGEROUS WEAPON Self-Control One reason some of us have trouble overcoming anger is that we've used it too often as an offensive weapon. It can be employed as an excuse to leave the house, it can bring an argument to an explosive end, and it can make others fearful and defensive. In the past this brought results of a sort, and helped reinforce the idea that anger works. The trouble with anger, though, is that it's destructive. Once angry, we hurt ourselves and we hurt others. Terrible things said in anger leave wounds that never heal, creating problems that lead to more anger. The AA program can show us that there is virtually no justification for anger, under any and all circumstances. If we sense it coming on, we have the choice of taking charge of our feelings. If we're angry over another's behavior, we can choose to practice acceptance. Above all, we can remember that anger might be a way of reacting, but it's not necessary in our lives. I'll make it through this day without a trace of anger. I'll frequently remind myself that anger is destructive and that my real purpose is to build a better life.


Member:
Location:
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 07:46 AM

Comments

Thats dumb. everone gets angry its a normel human emotion. its ok an nothin wrong with it as long as no hittin and yellin an all that jazz. juus keep it cool an talk it down but no big sin in getin mad sometime. were all human an its ok


Member: September
Location: FL
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 09:22 AM

Comments

Hello everyone, I ashamed to admit that I messed up over the weekend. I started drinking on Saturday night, I guess last week the whole trying to accept that I am an alcoholic was really terrifying to me. I didn't stop drinking until Tuesday night. I don't know why it is that I am the way I am but I accept it now. So Hello everyone, I am an alcoholic. I now accept rule # 1 of the 12 steps that I am powerless over alcohol and my life has become unmanageable. I am now working on Step #2 which is putting all my faith in my HP- GOD that he will restore my sanity. I no longer want to fight so I am going to a meeting tonight. I now feelmore than ever that I would rather go to meetings and learn to accept my problem more than dealing with one more day after. Thanks to everyone for listening. Today is day #1


Member: Kim D.
Location: Bridgewater
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 10:09 AM

Comments

(((September))) Please don't feel ashamed, although those negative feelings are part and parcel of our active drinking days. I smiled as I read your post and believe it's the best one I've read in a long time. :-) "I no longer want to fight so I am going to a meeting tonight...." Wonderful. You will never regret going - promise. Also, there are LOTS of meetings and different types, so if you go tonight and don't hear what you need to... go to another and another and another. This program works - you never have to get sober again if you don't want to. :-) NOW - Onto "topic"... seeking outside, professional help is absolutely okay in my book. AA is meant to help us stay sober - not fix our broken home lives, erase harm we may have caused my children or heal our run down bodies. Although staying sober and working the 12 Steps improves those conditions, sometimes it takes outside assistance to complete the job. "@@" - IMO, anger is a healthy response to harmful situations. Anger, if processed correctly, can actually be an indicator that our boundaries are being crossed or injustices are being done. However, if that anger is carried and not let go of... then it becomes a resentment which is replaying anger over and over again and is very detrimental to our physical, as well as emotional sobriety. Just my spin on it...


Member: Tim
Location:
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 11:26 AM

Comments

Today is my 1st day back with AA and this site. I did what I have done so many times before and went back to drinking. Once again I said I can handle it. I will control it. How STUPID can I be. I am back to drinking every night way too much. I even got a frig for the garage to "hide" my beer. Seems like every morning when I check it the thing is empty so I have to fill it up on the way home from work. I am so predictable that the small store near my house has my beer and cigs on the counter and rung up by the time I can get out of my car and inside. I plan to go back to a meeting today, but I am so ashamed of myself. I feel like they should just kick me out. Of course that is not what I want. This time I will get a sponser and work the steps. I realize my way does not work. Right now I am just trying to get through my work day without getting in trouble. Please pray for me. This has to stop! I cannot not let GOD help me anymore. Thank you for listening.


Member: Carrie
Location: Los Angeles
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 12:22 PM

Comments

September and Tim, you guys should not be ashamed - as you are learning, you are alcoholics and we have to keep learning that until we have completely given up the idea that somehow, someday we will control and enjoy our drinking. I needed the relapses that I had, without them I may not be where I am today. I know in my soul that I do not need anymore drinking to prove to myself that I am an alcoholic, and I now know what it means to be an alcoholic. I pray everyday that I do not forget what it was like, because for us to forget is to die. You guys are exactly where you should be, get to a meeting and I will meet you on the road of happy destiny!!


Member: Susan
Location:
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 01:15 PM

Comments

Tim & September, you should not feel ashamed just keep on trying. I have been "trying" for years. I get a few days and then just really feel the need to drink but I want to change and every day that we don't drink is a victory. I am now on day 4 and all I can do is worry about this minute, if I think ahead I slip. Anyway, at least we know and admit we have a problem. Hang in there and every day is a new beginning


Member: Tim
Location:
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 02:25 PM

Comments

Thanks!


Member: buzzsaw
Location: Detroit
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 03:19 PM

Comments

Life so far is miserable without drinking. I went through my phone book of friends last night and went through about 30 numbers and could not come up with one name that probably was not drinking or cared to hear about me trying not to drink. If sobority keeps me this unhappy, what is the point. Where is the "magic"?


Member: Jackie
Location: MN
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 03:38 PM

Comments

Buzzsaw!!!! Hey whats going on over there? Hang in there! What happened to your sponser and your meetings you were going to? They will make you feel better. Drinking will not make you feel better, you will feel worse, and get lost in that black hole all over again. Get yourself around other aa'ers who know what you are going thru. I am keeping you in my prayers :) Jackie jaxj35@netzero.net


Member: Susan
Location:
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 03:44 PM

Comments

Buzzsaw, I understand what you are saying but maybe it means you need to have new friends to start over. I sometimes feel so lousey not drinking that I wonder what is the point. But I do know that on the days I drink, at nightwhen I go to sleep or try to, I am not happy with myself and I feel lousey. While I was drinking I felt great and thought "Why would I not want to do this?" But the answer lies inside ourselves - are we happy with ourselves if we drank..later on when sober. It is an artificial way of functioning. I once thought that if I could drink, I could handle anything life could throw my way. But now I realize it has to come from within not a drug and alcohol is a drug. But I understand your struggle. I live it everyday. Everyday I want to drink and some days I win and some days I lose but I'm trying. I'm here struggling with you.


Member: Jan BB
Location: Paris, France
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 03:57 PM

Comments

The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines.~Page 60, 4th edition, Alcoholics Anonymous ((Buzzsaw)) Look, if your looking for a way out of this sobriety, you will find it faster than a pull tab. Why not go to a meeting and meet a few sober men who have contented sobriety, some time in AA, and ask them how the hell they did it? Get to know these guy's, and I'm not talking the wackos or the Christ on the cross ax grinders, no, I'm talking about straight up guy's like you who have lost it all early in sobriety, stuck it out, got their lives back and more and are hanging around the halls of AA to give a hand and support to a guy like you. They are there and you know who I mean. What the hell are you waiting for, get going, your sobriety is precious and you don't even have a clue. HOPE for ((Everyone))janbbparis@yahoo.com


Member: Moses
Location: Alabama
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 05:54 PM

Comments

Buzzsaw get a grip and act like a man. Pull yourself up by the bootstraps and rock and roll. This mushy girly shit these stupid women are crapin out they mouths makes me want ta puke. Quit crying and go see a priest minister or rabbi, not some AA guru who wants to rule your life!!!! Maybe even professional help like not only the minister and topic suggests but a different type of professional, the mental kindy. good luck but you got to get a grips dude get some real help not this shit these silly girlies are saying.


Member: p
Location: p
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 06:11 PM

Comments

you know buzzy if you drink you might die


Member: Mike
Location: AL.
Date: July 30, 2003
Time: 07:06 PM

Comments

Moses THANK YOU Buzzsaw you need meetings its not easy you half to work at it.It doesn't happen over night you got to work at it.Theres no magic stop the whinning get to a meeting.Its all about you and how bad you want it.Don't wait for the magic you got to go make the magic happen.


Member: Kelly M
Location: NH
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 12:16 AM

Comments

Hey (((Buzzsaw))), I felt like you did my first time around in AA. I did not get it because I wanted to drink more than I wanted to stay sober. I went back out there for 6 years of hell before I surrendered. I used to come to this page a lot drunk and read about getting sober. When I got out of rehab in October I went home unpacked and went directly to a meeting I used to attend 6 years prior. Two old timers came up to me and remembered me and said Welcome back. I felt like I was (home) or like I was exactly where I needed to be. That is the difference between wanting to go to any length to sober up or just playing around with the concept. I can relate to wanting to get it by coming here and really getting it by going the extra mile and attending meetings, joining a group, taking a job in AA, getting a sponsor, working the Steps, helping another drunk etc. Even if your heart is not in it and your not done drinking yet keep coming here until you get the (COURAGE) and (WILLINGNESS) to (((SURRENDER))). I hope you do. I have a great life now and I was a pathetic lush at the end. I made Nickolas Cage look like a lightweight in "Leaving Las Vegas"! I DRANK 24/7 FOR 2 YEARS STRAIGHT AND DID NOT DIE... JUST WISH I HAD! If you want to die buy a gun and unload a clip into yourself it's a lot less painful then dying by alcohol. Of course you know I'm kidding and I hope you don't ever give up. If I could sober up then you can. I had to Surrender to Win. Think about it. God Bless. Kelly


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 12:16 AM

Comments

Day 127 sober


Member: Tracy D
Location: Ohio
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 03:05 AM

Comments

Hi there! Tracy D. here alcoholic...I have been surfing this board for a days..I have to admit if nothing else it has prompted me to pick up my big book..{And my sponser} First off I don't believe there are any "victims" as far as alcoholism..with that said..I don't believe that I "choose" to be an alcoholic..I don't like being an alcoholic! So trust me I wouldn't choose it! lol I choose to not drank today..The big book talks about something missing in the thought process of an alcoholic..The "missing link" that makes us not remember what the first drink will do to us..The founders seem to believe that the only "thing" that can fill the "missing link" is help from a higher power..I am new..very new..They stayed sober and lived to write about it..My best guess is they were on to something..lol I don't want to die..and I WILL die if I continue drinking..That's not some BS someone told me in a meeting that some "truth" my Dr told me after my second alcoholic seisure..Disease? Brain completely messed? Does it matter? Thanks for letting me ramble! Peace and Love to All : )


Member: Jane C.
Location: Alaska
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 03:29 AM

Comments

Jane C..an alcoholic...18 days sober...still can't get myself to a meeting..so much social anxiety... maybe I do need a little counseling boost about now to get me to go.. Had a dental appointment today and the church across the street from his office has a bag lunch meeting every day... so far can't get myself to go in...first I know that I'd never be able to share the way I do here...such discomfort..I work on getting over it, but it's no picnic without some kind of good medication...and there is also that thing called false pride..."What if the dentist or someone from his staff saw me going in"..this is awful and I know it...but staying sober is the most important thing for me and if it works this way.. then it will have to do for now... There is so much good posted here (Forget the folks that say otherwise)..so much has helped me to stay sober..we get to read over and again what has been shared here..it's hard to take away all the good things from an AA live group..can't remember what they all say...since this is a topic on counseling and such...maybe it's worth looking into again...I can remember that I did get a lot of good help..maybe it's something we should all think about..plus I read a lot of alcohol material along with the BB and other AA material May God give us all another sober day, with His Grace...


Member: September
Location: FL
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 08:44 AM

Comments

Hello everyone, Day #2 once again. Thanks for not judging me on my fall and thanks for your kind words. I don't know what brought my life to be at this point but I am scared. I remeber not to long ago enjoying life and not constantly thinking about it. Now I have to pray that God grant me peace, that I make some sense out of who I have become. And thats another thing. Who am I? I don't really know anymore. There are so many things that I have done, so many people that I have hurt that its hard to be who I was. I don't think that I will ever understand what happened to my life, i want to run away to a different place where no one knows and just start all over. Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad idea. Maybe things would be better. I don't even know where I would want to live. And besides moving won't change the way I feel inside. I hope one day all of this becomes a distant nightmare.


Member: Glen
Location: Denton TX
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 09:14 AM

Comments

September in Florida, what brought your life to this point is the same thing that brought me to the same point September 6th, 1996. I was close to being fired at work, my ex wife was scared to bring my two sons to see me, the people who worked under had quit paying attention cause they knew I was gone. Even the collection agencies had given up. It is a distant memory, one I hope I remember though, so that I never go back there. How so? Aa and the steps. It's never too late.


Member: Autumn
Location: AA capital of Georgia
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 09:21 AM

Comments

Hi...my name is Autumn. I've been sober for 19 months but feel almost like a newcomer. Those 19 months of sobriety were spent in a long term treatment center for alcoholism and drug addiction. AA was the focus of our lives and still is the focus of my life. I had a sponsor while I was there and I went to meetings everyday so, it's a lot like "real" life sober. I guess the only difference is where I hang my hat these days. But it IS different. When things go wrong, I don't have the 15 women I lived with to talk to immediately. I have other women...I don't know...it's a big transition. Glad to have found this site.


Member: Glen
Location: Denton TX
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 09:22 AM

Comments

September in Florida, what brought your life to this point is the same thing that brought me to the same point September 6th, 1996. I was close to being fired at work, my ex wife was scared to bring my two sons to see me, the people who worked under had quit paying attention cause they knew I was gone. Even the collection agencies had given up. It is a distant memory, one I hope I remember though, so that I never go back there. How so? Aa and the steps. It's never too late.


Member: Carrie
Location: Los Angeles
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 01:49 PM

Comments

I keep hearing "reasons" on this site to not go to meetings. They are BS, get your ass to a meeting, sit down, shut up, listen and learn. Sorry if that offends anyone, but it's life or death we are talking about - and if you don't believe me, keep listening to the crap your diseased mind is telling you. Trust me, I have been there - your head will come up with a million and one reasons why AA isnt "right" for you. It will come up with ways that you can drink again like a lady/gentleman, why life sucks and why shouldn't you even try to get sober, maybe I was making to big a deal out of all of this sober stuff, I'm different, they are a cult, what if something really bad happens and I want to drink, what will I do on holidays, I want to be normal, if I am sober what will i do for fun, what will I toast with on special occasions, I just need to try harder, people will think I am a freak if I go to meetings, I don't want to have to go to meetings for the rest of my life, I don't want to become a bible thumper, and on and on and on... None of that shit matters. Deal with the here and now - you can recover, ONE DAY AT A TIME. Not on this site, not by yourself, but within the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous with your God, the 12 steps and the sponcer of your choice.


Member: Tracy D
Location: Ohio
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 03:13 PM

Comments

{{{Carrie}}} Thanks for the post..I think that's what I was trying to say in my last post but was trying to be "gentle". People can debate till kingdom come, god knows how the alocholic mind (mine included) loves to wrap it's self around things and debate,looking for an easier answer. For this day I am not dabating I am listening to people that have what I want. I guess the question is..What do you want? Hard question to answer...Peace and Love to All


Member: Kerry C
Location: TX (kerryctx@hotmail.com)
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 05:05 PM

Comments

Carrie well said, couldn't have said it better. To anyone that is alcoholic and thinks it is ok to slip here and there. 2 people I know slipped this past week; one is dead and the other is in the hospital seriously injured and they were 2 seperate instances. If you are alcoholic, alcohol will kill you one way or another. Pages 60-63 in the Big Book describe us alcoholics well. "Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity? Selfishness, self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt." The solution is to work the 12 Steps. Stopping drinking is only the beginning it is not the solution.


Member: Jane C.
Location: Alaska
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 05:46 PM

Comments

Jane C....There is an old saying.. "Do the thing you fear and the fear will go away".This is not true in every case..sometimes the fear gets greater as in mine...The greatest fear, next to social anxieties is driving...my Mom had 3 sisters that never learned to drive..I drive, but hate it..I do the very thing I fear every single day and the fear has never gone away...NEVER>..more than one professional has agreed thet it is possible to have lifetime fears no matter how hard we try...as for AA...it is for me..I know this..I did all I was told to do my first time around and stayed sober..I got sober before I went to AA then.. I wanted AA to see if I really needed it..I did..for now,however this is the only AA I am willing to go to..I read the BB, and other AA related material..and for me the Bible is my biggest comfort..then the BB...I need all the help I can get...today is day 18 for me this second time around...and I ask God every day to Please take away the need and the desire for a drink..it is working so far..and for me all the things posted here are just what I need..I take the good and really do leave the bad..we are who we are not just alcoholics..also people who can say whatever we need to say to whoever and whenever..I pray God will give you all another sober day..


Member: Stacy
Location: West Coast
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 07:55 PM

Comments

Stacy, Day 115. I'm an alcoholic and I'm in recovery. Part of that recovery for me is seeking outside help from a therapist. In addition, to my meetings, my BB, my journaling etc, I go to therapy once a week. I anticipate that I won't always need therapy, but I know that will always need AA. Thanks for being here.


Member: MARTHA-FUCKIN
Location: STEWART
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 09:18 PM

Comments

YOU FUCKING MORONS!!!!!!! THOSE MEETINGS ARE FOPR FUCKING LOSER FUCKS LIKE CARIIE!!!!!! WANT WHAT WHO HAS? STUPID FUCKING ASSHOLE THING TO SAY!!!! WHO WANTS SHIT OTHERS HAVE I SURES AS HELL DONT. THIS IS SOME DUMB SHIT HERE. IF YOU DONT WANT TO DRINK DONT FUCKHEADS!!!!!!!


Member: Tom
Location: NY
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 10:00 PM

Comments

Day 46 here. still sober and thankful for it. September, not knowing your age and how long you've been drinking, what did you do before you drank? I ask because since I haven't been drinking I'm finding myself slowing drifting back to the things I actually use to enjoy.


Member: not martha
Location: thank god
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 10:25 PM

Comments

Martha,,,hahahah,, your funny, whats the topic ? professonal help?


Member: Barry C
Location: Central Fl
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 10:38 PM

Comments

Carrie and Kerry well said. They say don't drink and go to meetings.One day at a time life has gotten better.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 10:49 PM

Comments

Day 128 sober I'm Diane, may God bless you all


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: July 31, 2003
Time: 11:59 PM

Comments

Whats the topic Diane she's the topic Day 128 sober


Member: not martha
Location:
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 01:48 AM

Comments

YOU FUCKING MORONS!!!!!!! THOSE MEETINGS ARE FOPR FUCKING LOSER FUCKS LIKE CARIIE!!!!!! WANT WHAT WHO HAS? STUPID FUCKING ASSHOLE THING TO SAY!!!! WHO WANTS SHIT OTHERS HAVE I SURES AS HELL DONT. THIS IS SOME DUMB SHIT HERE. IF YOU DONT WANT TO DRINK DONT FUCKHEADS!!!!!!!


Member: lastgasper
Location: middleathnight
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 01:52 AM

Comments

cant sleep. too restless...pills dont help, drinking NOT an option. court case pending...possible 1 to 5...lawyers my higher power now.thought i could dip my toe in the water and not get wet...sponser says "so you thought you could walk on water eh?".suggested getting additional help outside aa framework to support my recovery program...for some of us it aint 'all in the book'. shrink says his concept of the disease is one of isolation. have trouble reaching out 1 on 1 after FTF meetings...dont want to get involved in anybody elses shit...enough trouble dealing with my own. wanna stay even, not on anybodys pad, might have to do something i dont want to do...hate frigging obligations. pretty sick huh? selfcentered to the max...getting involved with people beyond the superficial level takes me too far out of me comfort zone. shrink says ive got some serious trust issues...no shit...who of us aint been blindsided by a socalled 'friend'? trust noone and they wont let you down...let noone get close enough to care and you wont let THEM down. 10 or 20 yrs of drinkin made a skeptic outa ME...hardwired shit like that hard to let go of. guess thats why im posting...cyberworld is a new bit for me...less personal. besides, typing is really making me sleepy...kind of like reading the Big Book. thanks for the forum to dump some of this shit so i can get some zzzzzzz and hit my morning meeting. peace out.


Member: not martha
Location:
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 02:00 AM

Comments

not martha YOU FUCKING MORONS!!!!!!! THOSE MEETINGS ARE FOPR FUCKING LOSER FUCKS LIKE CARIIE!!!!!! WANT WHAT WHO HAS? STUPID FUCKING ASSHOLE THING TO SAY!!!! WHO WANTS SHIT OTHERS HAVE I SURES AS HELL DONT. THIS IS SOME DUMB SHIT HERE. IF YOU DONT WANT TO DRINK DONT FUCKHEADS!!!!!!!


Member: Jeff H.
Location: mid.Missouri
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 04:05 AM

Comments

If it were only that simple.Personally I've tried to just not drink many times.I guess what this person is wanting to say to us all is K.I.S.S.!?,or maybe I'm a "FN" moron.Always looking for the good in people.This is my first time on this site,...and you know what I'll be back tomorrow with news of my first sober fishing trip.I also have a challenge for anyone who is having trouble in the mornings,open up your bible to Proverbs and read chapter 1.Proverbs has 31 chapters, it inspires me every morning(and helps me remember the date)God Bless Goodnight:)zzzzzz


Member: lastgasper
Location: FUCKHEADSVILLE
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 04:31 AM

Comments

Not Martha...kinda stuck in neutral are ya? maybe you need some professional help to KNOCK THE FUCKIN SHIT OUTA YA AN GET YOUR SORRY ASS IN GEAR AND OFF THIS SITE!!!!!! you woke me up from a nice little nap and pissed all over my serenity. its a guy like you thats the reason im looking at 1 to 5...and i didnt even squeeze the trigger! someday youll open your ugly piehole when you have know idea who your dealing with, and god will see to it that you get what you have really earned!


Member: lastgasper
Location: FUCKHEADSVILLE
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 04:57 AM

Comments

Not Martha...kinda stuck in neutral are ya? maybe you need some professional help to KNOCK THE FUCKIN SHIT OUTA YA AN GET YOUR SORRY ASS IN GEAR AND OFF THIS SITE!!!!!! you woke me up from a nice little nap and pissed all over my serenity. its a guy like you thats the reason im looking at 1 to 5...and i didnt even squeeze the trigger! someday youll open your ugly piehole when you have know idea who your dealing with, and god will see to it that you get what you have really earned!


Member: Kathy K.
Location: Northeast
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 05:30 AM

Comments

September - you might find it easier not to try to figure things out so early on in sobriety just work your program as deligently as possible. Changes will happen in your life without your even realizing it!! Autumn - welcome aboard - please keep posting. too.


Member: September
Location: FL
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 08:31 AM

Comments

Day #3 and spirits are starting to come back up but still a little down. Haven't been to a meeting yet because of the situation with my car but I am working two jobs full force right now, haven't had a day or night off since I came out of my insanity, probably all for the better those panck attack things are happening again. Thanks ((Kathy)) and ((Tom))..wish you both the best in your sobriety..and ((Carrie)) your right, everything you said are the same things that I told myself. I do know that this is something that I need help with and finally feel like thats okay, whatever gets me where I want to be. Maybe I will make some close friends like everyone has been talking about. Maybe it will be a really good experience. ((Autum)) glad to have you in the group...((Jane C)) happy to see your still doing great.... My thoughts and prayers are with all of you. I really feel like this time will be better...Just as ((Kathy K)) don't try to figure this thing out just do what you need to do to change it...Hopefully those life changes will happen soon :-)


Member: Kelly M
Location: NH
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 09:01 AM

Comments

Good Morning All, Congrats to all of us staying sober. Tracy Ohio, you made me remember a saying that I like. "When we stop being a victim we become a survivor". I also like, "We need to walk in the direction of our fear". Most of my fears are ungrounded and kind of like the boogieman. Once walked through my fears seem silly. Right now I fear moving and have financial insecurity. I turn it over many times a day and every day I ask for help with it. Yesterday I picked up the phone and made a bunch of calls for apartments and help with finding rental assistance. I did get somewhere and now have some leads. New Hampshire is the (Live Free Or Die) State for anyone who has not seen the liscence plate. We have very few State laws to help people because my State thinks we should stand on our own. We have no real rights for tenants and are (tenants at will) for the most part. We do not have rent control either. There is very little in the way of housing for the poor because the state does not want welfare housing etc. I love NH and part of the reason is because The less laws on the books the more free we are. I talked with a lady from the State Dept. yesterday and she said to me if the rents are too high in your area all you can do is move North! Pretty straight forward! Another call brought about some real promising results on a place. God has a plan for me if I meet him half way and do my part, the action part. Picking up the 100 pound phone and walking through the fear. Everyone have a nice Friday/Weekend. Don't drink, go to meetings, call your sponsor, pick up the phone, it ain't that heavy... Kelly ;)


Member: Alcoholics Anonymous
Location: World Wide Web
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 09:17 AM

Comments

Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problems and help others to recover from alcoholism. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. There are no dues or fees for A. A. membership; we are self supporting through our own contributions. AA is not allied with any sect, denominations, politics, organization or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy, neither endorses nor opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help others alcoholics to achieve sobriety.


Member: Philip
Location: VA
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 10:12 AM

Comments

I just found this site. It's nice to know there are others that can relate to my situation. Yesterday was day 10 for me....and I failed. Nothing bad happened but I let myself and my family down. I pray that I can make it this time.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 10:41 AM

Comments

hi Diane here day 129 sober, yesterday I did not read all the post so today I read on a few and this cursing person sounds like my Son and so sad to have such a filthy mouth you have no brains so you curse????? Try and read your Bible and let God lead you and not the Devil. I've had 3 days of mixed good and bad. Good because my sweet Daughter came and raised my spirits. Bad because my Son was again showing signs of using drugs. So his Filthy mouth had to trash me and his Dad. All that saves me is prayer.. I of course will fight back when I'm trashed and told of how my Son hates me but I will stay sober because I see how the drug and booze is destroying him. I pray he wakes up soon before God takes him. God bless all


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 10:56 AM

Comments

(Last gasper) I guess your post is what got me to post on the other person that is trashing us because my serenity has been pisted all over by my Son. I hate cursing but I know sometimes a curses pops out of us when we are upset so was not talking about your cursing. I agree with you. I am going to have a good day. My Son did not have his regular poison dreams last night but he did the night before and he scared my Daughter and me and my Husband we where scared to sleep and locked our bedroom doors. But last night was better but he did tell me he hated me. He wants us to co-sign for him a new truck which when he never makes it one week without asking us for money we just can not afford another payment or to have him trash our good credit so we just pray his truck holds out. Oh we gave him the truck then he trashed it while on crank but he of course will not admit to any wrong doings. Sorry for the double post but I just wanted to explain my first post. Love in Christ..... Diane Oklahoma


Member: Jane C.
Location: Alaska
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 11:41 AM

Comments

Jane C..still an alcoholic..day 19 and keeping the faith that I get through the day..seems like it does get easier when you really decide drinking can't be part of your life anymore..( September. Iwanted to drink when I would get very tired.. thinking it would pick me up and it did..it gave me energy and I really did get things done..then I'd come down and tired again and want MORE.. I had to accept the fact that I was doing too much...do less if possible)...ask God to be with you through the day..and try to decide for yourself that you will have a sober day)...(Diane..one of my sons was pretty much like yours..I had to get help to learn what I needed to do to help keep myself sane through all his STUFF..I did Al_Anon for a while years ago and I also had talked to his Doctors in the VA Hospital..I learned the thint I hate doing...TOUGH LOVE..and it really does hurt, but he knows now that I won't take any BS from his...of all my 3 sons, he was and is the one with the kindest and gentlest heart..sometimes that"s why they do the things they do..this is what I was told..the best often end up making wrong choices...and he did.. I can relate to your problem totally...I hope that God will be with you and all of us through the day...


Member: Carrie
Location: los angeles
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 12:34 PM

Comments

diane PLEASE check out alanon - www.alanon.com


Member: Ethan T
Location: MA
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 01:12 PM

Comments

Hi all. Day #19 for me. Another day-off from work (I'm self-employed) for a good reason - taking the family on a 'hike'. (Expect we'll again spend more time examining bugs and puddles with the little ones then actually hiking.) You're all in my prayers for a sober day in which you experience His love, compassion and grace.


Member: ME
Location: USA
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 01:57 PM

Comments

Philip and others - just keep trying, We may fall but today is another day. Ignore the moron in huge letters saying crap. There will always be those "losers" in the world. Really they are longing for attention and help and going about it the wrong way. Oh and "Moses" who made a really stupid remark about not listening to "the girlie stuff" on here. You sounded very ignorant, which I'm sure you are and so I must overlook that too. But everyone responds to different ways and yes, some of us respond better to kinder "girlie" words than your "Hey, dude, get your act together" Let's not knock each other- we're all alcoholics - none better than the other....peace...


Member: Tim
Location: World
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 03:33 PM

Comments

Hi all Tim an alcoholic today I have no desire to drink.I have no desire to do anything I know I need Professional help.I tried Professional help before it just didn't work for me.I have a hard time explaining myself sounds easy but its not.I do all the talking the doctor does none.He listens gives me pills and on myway. The only thing that adds up is the money.So you say go to another doctor an start all over again. I just can't do it they say you can't change people places and things. I know that and I acept that.I'm not going to jump of the brigh but life in todays world is not easy. Its very hard for me to get threw everyday life today with everyday Bullshit.I just don't want to be bothered with people. So you say its easy go to a meeting. Its sad but I have no desire to talk to anybody. I don't even read the newspaper its to depressing and the TV to.With all the lying cheating stealing and lets not forget OJ SIMSON innocents.So I just live my life and try to get along with the everyday bullshit knowing I can not change people places things.Sorry but take is how I feel


Member: September
Location: FL
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 04:35 PM

Comments

hello everyone, gald to see we are all doing well..its the weekend and this is what killed me last week but I am going to stay busy and stay strong. MY day is comming to an end so i thought i would come to this site to give me some strength before I leave outta work. i have no desire to drink today, guess because its only day 3 so thats good. Hope this lasts me through the weekend. My thoughts and prayers are with each of you...hope everyone has a sober weekend.


Member: Kim D.
Location: Bridgewater
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 04:52 PM

Comments

((Phillip)) "Failure" indicates that you have your drinking on a moral plane. Perhaps you think your not "strong" enough to stay sober because you drank? That's the way I used to feel when I'd be dry for a while and then BAM - without lots of forethought - I'd be getting drunk again. Phillip - you are NOT a failure. You have the disease of alcoholism that takes away your choice to drink if you aren't in recovery. Eventually, if left untreated, our disease gets the best of us. I strongly suggest you - and you ((September)) - get yourselves to an AA meeting. You will find a room full of people who suffer from alcoholism just like you, who have found a way to get and stay sober through the program of AA. They are there to help you - the newcomer - learn how to live day to day sober. It's doable and life is SO MUCH better without the booze. What do you have to loose? Take care.


Member: vic
Location: dc
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 06:08 PM

Comments

alcoholism is NOT a disease-thats just stupid. as is the idea that aa meetings give somebody more choice to not drink than somebody who doesnt. anybody can not drink in and out of aa. there IS a moral element to it and your just a sloppy heaten not willing to take responsibiklity if yous think there isnt. just dont drink-its not thst hard.


Member:
Location:
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 08:34 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, I haven't been writing much lately. I've hit a real low spot with my depression, but the good news is that I really didn't drink much at all during this time the past few weeks. I think I'm doing better and I hope all of you are doing well and making it one day at a time. Keep the faith


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 11:03 PM

Comments

well good night all and thanks for the advice on alanon I've went to a site on it but did not get any real help on my son, I do try and do tough love but he is a full grown man and he works 52 hours a week so I have no control over what he does and I know if he messes up jail will be next stop but he yells at me and that hurts....good night all and God bless everyone and stay sober and off drugs


Member: Don't Drink
Location: One Day At A Time
Date: August 01, 2003
Time: 11:04 PM

Comments

The Basics - How to NOT drink just for today >>>>> 1)Pray asking to be kept from taking a drink (or drug) for these next 24 hrs as soon as eyes open in the morning >>>>> 2)Read today's page in a Spiriutal Meditation Book (example: Daily Reflections, Just For Today, 24 Hour Book)>>>>> 3)Read a bit of the Big Book from the beginning >>>>> 4)Phone your Sponsor to discuss what you have read >>>>> 5)Attend at least one f2f AA mtg >>>>> 6)Give thanks for this sober day before bed each night.


Member: Shy
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 12:56 AM

Comments

Seeking Professional help .......God and Jesus are a great start....For those who are non believers just try it, you could fall in love... What do you have to lose, We believers know what is at stake......


Member: Tracy D
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 02:19 AM

Comments

Hi there! Getting home from a late meeting and lots of coffee and cigs..with a bunch of alcoholics! I was so down and craving so bad around 9:30 then I remembered a late meeting someone had mentioned to me..so I ran out the door and I came home feeling much much better! Weekends are gonna be a trigger for me for awhile..But I feel....get a load of this...almost happy now..Well anyways thought we could use some good news..Here's to small victorys! Peace and Love to All {even cussing guy and it's not a disease person hehe}


Member:
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 08:15 AM

Comments

good one Shy, thank you..


Member: Ethan T
Location: MA
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 10:21 AM

Comments

Thanks Shy. You nailed it! Happy sober Saturday to everyone.


Member: Angela
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 10:48 AM

Comments

Well, today makes just about one week for me. I'd like to share this poem I found: Don't Quit When things go wrong as they sometimes will, when the road you're trudging seems all uphill, when you're feeling low and the stress is high, and you want to smile but you have to sigh, when worries are getting you down a bit.. by all means pray - and don't you quit. Success is failure turned inside out, God's hidden gift in the clouds of doubt. You never can tell how close you are - it may be near when it seems so far. So trust in the Lord when you're hardest hit.. It's when things go wrong that you must not quit! There is no author to this or I would post it. The poem could be about any struggle. I just read it and it reminded me to keep trying in my stuggle for sobriety and if things go wrong I must not quit in my struggle, etc.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 01:09 PM

Comments

Day 130 have a good Saturday to all and a sober one


Member:
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 01:55 PM

Comments

This is for Tim, who sounds extremely depressed. I can really relate to your dilemma. It took years for me to find a doctor and a medication that worked for my mental health condition. I went through all the SSRI's etc. I was finally placed an an "atypical" antidepressant, which has made a difference in my life. I can finally sleep without having to drink myself to passout point, and having a normal sleep cycle is essential to function. I won't say I feel perfectly fine, I still get down, it runs in my family, but I am better. Please don't give up. Ask for a referral to a psychiatrist if you are only seeing a regular doctor. Discuss the "atypical" medications option. Many of these were created to treat bipolar syndrome but work for depression. There are many, many forms of depression and mental health problems. I ask forgiveness of those who might jump on me for giving medical advice, but his situation made me very sad and since I was there, I felt the need to comment. Naturally, I'm sure Tim already knows that alcohol is a depressant, and must be avoided. Keep fighting to have a happy life. some of us may be doomed by genetics to live in somewhat of a grey hue, but it doesn't have to be black.


Member:
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 01:57 PM

Comments

Do you want real Sobriety then go to a real meeting


Member: Carrie
Location: Los Angeles
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 02:05 PM

Comments

Diane, Alanon is not for your son or anybody else, it's for you and your desire to change others and your need to feel that somehow you are responcible for someone elses actions and feelings. Your son is sick, but so are you and nothing is going to change if you don't take care of yourself and learn to let go. This site is for people who are recovering from alcoholism, not for people who wish others would recover. Let go and let God.


Member: Carrie
Location: Los Angeles
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 02:32 PM

Comments

Visiting a website is a far cry from attending a meeting. This site barely even resembles an AA meeting and I'm sure the same goes for any other recovery site. Help is OUT THERE, you just gotta go and get it.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 02:33 PM

Comments

thanks carrie but I come here for me I just sometimes feel the need to express myself about my fears for my Son but I am a Alcoholic so this site is for me. So when you say I am sick do you mean the control part of my personality? Like I want to control everything and with him I have no control but he still lives here so how do I forget him when he lives right under my nose? I am not upset or anything at you for your comments in fact I appreciate any help out there. I think alanon tells us to let go but how? I love my Son and I pray Daily that something will wake him up and I'm sorry but I can not stop loving him or my Daughter or my Grandchildren this is a every day thing which I believe when we have a child we should love them till we die no matter what but I do understand tough love and have tried it and now he is again gone on a maybe drug run. He got paid


Member:
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 03:07 PM

Comments

Diane you need Professional help this site can not solve all your problems please get some help


Member: ppppppp
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 03:54 PM

Comments

how do i stop drinking my life is a mess i am sick today i drank to much last night o my head


Member: mariab
Location: North Florida
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 04:19 PM

Comments

pppppp: the old adage is don't drink and go to meetings. As someone struggling with trying to just get more than 3-4 days sober under my belt without relapsing, I can relate to your pain. It is good you found this site. We alcoholics need help and other alcoholics seem to be the best source for that help. Find out where meetings are in your area and GO. Go with the hangover if you can drive safely (be VERY careful about that). And if you can't handle/won't/whatever go to a meeting, read the postings all over the Staying Cyber site. Especially Early Sobriety. It gives you a clear view that (1) you are not alone, (2) sobriety is possible, and (3) there is no "royal road" to sobriety--you have to work on it. But every sober day makes you more proud of yourself and improves your life. Good luck


Member: ciaraw
Location: ireland
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 06:26 PM

Comments

Hi I'm Ciara , an alcoholic. Just touching base, I'm six months around a.a., but still not sober...will not give up though, and this site has made me feel much less alone. Pissed off that I have this disease, but determined to not let it get the better of me. Going to my meetings on a regular basis, my one ray of hope!!Have to go, will come back soon...


Member: thank you
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 06:40 PM

Comments

thank you for this aa meeting it might work


Member: September
Location: FL
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 07:59 PM

Comments

Hello everyone, on Day 4. Today has been much better than the first three of starting over. Finding a renewed faith in myself and feeling like I am going to make it this time. Getting myself to a meeting finally tommorow morning. I would go tonight but I am in the middle of packing and getting ready to move. I am living with someone who has a terrible addiction to drugs and I have to hide my purse...everything,...she stole my car and lost it somehow...she is a big mess..so trying to stay postive on not dirnking and getting out of this house. My move in date is Friday next week. I really can't wait. I will have a lot less stress and hopefuly I can stay more focused on my goals. ((Diane)) really glad to see that you are doing well and staying strong. Its really hard to not drink when you have extra stress in your life as with your son. I can relate, my sister has really lost it. God I wonder how we both turned out to be so irresponsible. I was watching a movie today about a girl who has always been afraid to be herself, someone that always tries to impress others and feeds off thier opinions. I think thats me somehow and I didn't realize it. I think that I am just not happy with who I am. In the end she learned that she never really lived her life, she never was happy, it was sad and it made me think that I really need to figure out who I am and I really need to start enjoying life rather than letting it pass by me like this. I guess i am rambling a little. Thanks to everyone for listening. (mariab)) your are right about this site, for someone who is just coming to terms with the idea that they are an alcoholic this is the best place to start. It has showed me that there are others out there like me, that it is possible to change and that its okay to get help....I was depressed thinking that I am or could be an alcoholic, I just couldn't take the thought of it although I was trying to stay positive


Member: Carrie
Location: Los Angeles
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 08:09 PM

Comments

Diane, when I said you were sick, I meant suffering from alcoholism - I am not here to judge you. And I certainly didn't mean to imply that you should stop loving your children. I do not have children, I can not imagine what it would be like to live with a family member who is actively using. But I do have a wide support group and many of them have family members who attend Alanon meetings. I have gone to an alonon meeting, and from what I have experienced and been told, Alanon is for people who are "personally" affected by anothers addiction. They are not going to tell you how to get your son sober, no one can. But what they can do for you is to get you to take care of yourself and stop focusing on trying to change, or feel responcible for others. This is the last time I will suggest this, if you want help, get off of the internet and get into some meetings - the world wide web is NOT going to keep you sober and it is not going to help you greatly in any other areas of your life. Good luck to you, I think about you often, all of this is said out of love.


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 10:24 PM

Comments

thanks (( September)) for understanding what I am going through, I also have to carry my purse with me even to go pee. I walk around with a large purse hanging off my arm cause he has stole money from our banking account once I also lost a weed eater and a few more things. To the person who is nameless and says I am nuts well what ever. I know I am doing good cause I am sober and this site does help me carrie. I appreciate your thoughts and help carrie but if your not in my shoes how can you know what I am going through? I've been tempted to drink all weekend long and I stopped smoking and sure would love a cig but I'm trying hard to stay sober and smoke free. I do know what Carrie says is right that I need to go to a alanon meeting in my area. Well there is a number for Ok City maybe they will know if any meetings are closer to where I live. I watched a movie called clean and sober and a old gal on there said I wish I had a drink. Well I wish I had a drink lol.... Well the bad truth is that if I want one it's right down stairs cause my husband always has a bottle so a double temptation is on my side.


Member:
Location:
Date: August 02, 2003
Time: 10:33 PM

Comments

(Carrie) I think you'd be a more persuasive and effective advocate of AA if you did not routinely speak in absolutes. Though not the norm, drunks have gotten sober without AA, and there are many that attend AA meetings who are not sober, like Ciara above. It's the best program for attaining and maintaining sobriety, but it is not a panacea. A little more humility, along with sharing more about your personal experiences, would be much more helpful in leading people into the halls of an AA meeting where many, but not all, may find help. Thanks for caring and letting me share. :)


Member: Kelly M
Location: NH
Date: August 03, 2003
Time: 12:02 AM

Comments

Hi All, Just another day in paradise. Sobriety kicks butt! I had two bad days but today was awesome. My bad days were full of anxiety that I could not seem to get rid of. I had to scale back because I had no concentration. It felt like a major tizzy. I was like a car only firing on 3 plugs. Last night I went to bed early and slept good. I got up and went to Step Study which left me peaceful. The speaker was a delight to listen to. I went home and my BF and I went to Bonanza in Maine and for 10.99 I got a fabulous meal. The steak was perfectly cooked with a salad and desert bar to die for. I was stuffed after and joked with Mike that I really put the feed bag on. Since we were in Maine we hit a nearby Daily Reflections Meeting. I liked it and had never been to one before. The ride home was pretty, I really live in a beautiful place and it is easy to forget that. I went to look at an apt. but even though it was nice it was so generic. I know that right now I should take what I can get but I don't want to live in a shoebox either. I looked at one I really liked yesterday so I'm praying on it that if it is where God wants me to be it will happen. Then we went to another meeting where we both have jobs and ran into a friend I haven't seen in a few months and asked her to chair. She really had a very powerful message. After that we got supplies for a cookout for tomorrow and if the weather permits we will go blueberry picking. I know of a place that you would not believe. It is a 10 minute hike up to the fields of an old abandoned blueberry operation. All you can see for miles is blueberries and mountains and lakes. I usually get enough for a couple pies and freeze the rest for muffins. It should be a fun afternoon. They say a grateful heart will never drink and I know since I got sober I do all the things I could not do being a drunk. I am so Thankful to AA for giving me my life back. Wow, I'm really rambling, sorry. Have a nice sober Sunday all. Kelly ....BTW The speaker at tonights meeting said something I thought was cute. "Issues are like tissues, you pull one out of the box and another one pops up"... ;)


Member: Diane
Location: Oklahoma
Date: August 03, 2003
Time: 12:46 AM

Comments

very refreshing share Kelly M sounds like you got it together, I have my life going so good now and God is giving me everything I always wanted. I am going to just trust him for my Son and of course pray. I am Diane today is day 130 almost 131 and I thank God Daily or I mean each night for helping me to stay sober. God Bless you all and have a happy sober Sunday


Member: Jane C.
Location: Akaska
Date: August 03, 2003
Time: 03:02 AM

Comments

Jane C. here,another alcoholic..I think I am on day 20...and I'm feeling great...no desire to drink...Yesterday Mike and I went to lunch and I didn't say "Yes" to a glass of wine..it was a good, good feeling..(Kelly), I have a problem with concentration also..I can't stay in one book or place for too long...I find myself doing too many things at one time...reading 2 or 3 books at a time...not finishing a page of what I'm reading...I'm thinking about asking my Doctor about possibly checking for Attention Deficit Disorder..it doesn't sound too rediculous to me anymore I want to know why I can't stay in the moment. I think that in a strange way the ftf meetings themselves give members a lot of good therapy just sharing their stories..I still haven't gone back to meetings, but I know that I really do get a lot of help here.. It doesn't matter to me that there is so much that is negative about only using this site...it's a God- Send to people who aren't ready to face the public..Hopefully we'll all be able to get there and enjoy the fellowship with other members..some- one here said that this seemed more like a chat room..not to me..usually before and after meetings there is a lot of socializing...much like chat rooms on line..to each his own.. staying sober is the number one issue..and if it works this way, great..I know all of it comes from God...and I do ask everyday to take away my need and desire..so far He has been showing me His Grace,,I pray that we all have a sober week- end and that God will do for us what we can't do for ouselves alone..


Member: Kathy K.
Location: Northeast
Date: August 03, 2003
Time: 05:59 AM

Comments

Diane - I agree with what Carrie said to you 100%/ Please try to remember we have ALL been in your shoes - newly sober - please listen to what is being said to you. It does come from love - tough love - amd lots of hope that you find contentment .


Member: Kathy K.
Location: Northeast
Date: August 03, 2003
Time: 05:59 AM

Comments

Diane - I agree with what Carrie said to you 100%/ Please try to remember we have ALL been in your shoes - newly sober - please listen to what is being said to you. It does come from love - tough love - amd lots of hope that you find contentment .