Member: Alan
Location: West
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 2:52:03 AM

Comments

being 2 yrs sober, I thought I had the "turn it over" thing down pretty good. Guess what? I've been fooling myself. There are things that I have had no success in "turning it over". These things that bother me are disrupting my life. I've talked it over with my sponsor and mentioned it in meetings. I've recieved very little satisfaction to any solution proposed. I cannot seem to make it work. I'm asking for fresh solutions on how to TURN IT OVER. Thanking you and God bless


Member: Steve.C.
Location: newark de.
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 4:05:43 AM

Comments

Well thats pretty much where Iam to Alan.Ive recently been having to turn some things over my self.Its amazing how when somthing doesnt go the way I want it to it just really messes up my serinity

I too,thought I was doing pretty good with accepting things for what they are but at times It so darn hard especially when it involves hurt feeling which for me turns to anger thenself pitty sorrow then deppression

But I can say that If it werent for thins program that I wouldnt be even in the relationship that is now troubling me I had nothing to worry about but my next buzz!! mettings put mr\e back in my place on What it use to be like and what its like now!! thank you god ,recovering alcs!!


Member: Art H.
Location: Midwest
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 4:29:47 AM

Comments

Hi all, My name is Art H. & I am an alcoholic. Turning it over? I have been around longer than most & I still have trouble with this. For me its the need to be in control. I know when I start hurting & ask for help it is easyer to let go & let God, but when things are going well I tend to forget & want back in the drivers seat again.

I don't know what the answer is, so far for me I have to remember how I was, what I did, who I hurt & focus on amends for my drunken life style. It has been over 22 years since I have had a drink, I have to stay close to my last drunk by being around new comers or I will end up closer to my next drunk. By for now.


Member: Geri W
Location: Va
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 6:13:05 AM

Comments

Hello folks. Geri, a very grateful alcoholic here.

About "turning it over". IMO, it is impossible unless you have completed steps 1 - 11 and maybe 12. It is not until step 11 that the "key" was there for me. It is the "conscious contact" that allows me to quickly recognize that the old character defects are still lying in wait to rear their ugly heads. Step 11 - the meditation as well as the prayer gives me the ability to turn it over. Nightly inventory of the day lets me know what the hell needs turning over. In the beginning, before I had practiced this, it was tough. Like a child learning to ride a bike, I fell off lots of times, gots lots of scrapes before I could take the training wheels off of my sobriety. Thank goodness, step 3 was to be "willing" and then there was 4 - 12 to show me how. Finally, practicing the principles of the Program in all of my affairs makes it possible to "turn it over". Now it takes hours, not days, weeks or years of pain to recognize that I need to use the tools of the program to attain the serenity that I seek.

So, if you are a drunk like me, the answer is simple(no one promises easy). Get a sponsor, do the steps, go to meetings and seek your answers in the Big Book - and that's just the start. Then practice, practice, practice. The results are worth more than you can even imagine! The promises of the Program will come true for you.


Member: Bill
Location: Santa Fe
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 9:16:54 AM

Comments

I KEEP THIS SIGN OVER MY DESK GOOD MORNING THIS IS GOD I WILL BE HANDLING ALL YOUR PROBLEMS TODAY. I WILL NOT NEED YOUR HELP SO HAVE A GOOD DAY it helps keep the B.S. down alittle so have a good day


Member: Dave F
Location: WISCONSIN
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 9:46:15 AM

Comments

Hello my names Dave and i'm an alcoholic,,i've got 32 days sober and i'm still on step 3 working at step four and turning my problems over to god is a little hard i do try though,,theres some hurt feelings i have and jealousy thats going on in my life right now with me and my wife that i try to turn them over to god or ask him to help me out and then theres some resentment which turns into anger with my step son,,i know i need help with this and am realitively new i work second and its hard to get to meeting and i dont have a sponser to help me work the steps kinda but i'm going to meetings on the weekends and i do reflect on how much insane ive been living and how out of control my life has been i was hit by a train car wreck,motorcycle,,dui's i hurt my family and myself,,im' learning to be honest about myself i am what i am an alcoholic i accept that,,now i need to go from there,,one day at a time,,i just got back home/been seperated from my wife and i dont want to fall back into my old ways i know theres always my feelings and stinking thinking that can mess me up always there knockin... and i need to work on turning things over,,i still need help myself...good luck with yourself..


Member: tony g
Location: ma
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 12:33:28 PM

Comments

tony,alcoholic..for me to turn it over,is to let go and let god.the situation at hand ,let's say i don't like it,well i still have to face it,but i pray for some guidance with it,i may meditate a little over it ,i look at it from the other sides point of view,after doing all that,i let it go..move on to something else.God will let it play out as he see's fit,then i (try) to remain as humble as i can...always trying to move on..and then i study the books too...hope this helps someone, it helps me...... d.d.t and m.m.


Member: sandy p
Location: bainbridge
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 12:53:57 PM

Comments

hi im new. I was in / in-patient treatment for 3 weeks got out felt pretty good but im playing russian roulette with the program & myself. Turning it over is a tough task pretty much like living life. we re suppose to stop controling yet we have to control every minute we are awake the urge we have to drink, to stay sober. Its a constant tug of war. any comments on rlationships right after recovery with someone you met in recovery?


Member: Steven H.
Location: NYC
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 12:55:24 PM

Comments

My name is Steven and I am an alchoholic. Turning it over for me involves plugging back in, via meditation, prayer, talking to other alchoholics, listening to other alchoholics, sponsor, literature. December will be seven years for me in AA.Sobriety has become such an interesting experience that it is easy to just get caught up in "life." I need to plug back in weekly. To hear beginners dealing with real basic stuff. To talk to them after the meeting. It never fails to help me remember that I am not driving. On Thanksgiving I went to a great meeting about the 10th step (reading from the 12 & 12.) In reading that step it reminded me of all the alchoholic personality traits that get between me and the world. I just need to keep practicing all the actions that have been passed on to me. Thanks, Steven


Member: Art H.
Location: Midwest
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 1:36:49 PM

Comments

Hello again, I am Art an alcoholic. Sandy on relationships most will say wait a year or more before you get involved. It is all subjective, my only suggestion is that you have s sponser of the same sex & talk to this person.

I met my present wife in treatment in 1977, we are still married, have three children and both still attend A.A. it was not easy, we are also rare. In my work experience I have worked in & ran many treatment programs during the last 20 years. I have seen 100's of treatment relationships start & fail. Again bottom line, it's your recovery so please use your sponser to help in all your decisions around your recovery.


Member: sandy p
Location: Bainbridge
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 2:00:12 PM

Comments

Thanks Art Im so new to all of this. Recovering relationships, talking to people on the computer. i just got this computer for this reason Im deaf and getting much at the meetings was pretty hard. I havent been sober for long and im an old gal. ive drank a couple of times already. sounds like you and your wife are rare and i do need a sponsor can i get one here?


Member: Bonnie C  -  5/30/80
Location: Seattle
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 2:09:17 PM

Comments

Hi extended family, bonnie/alcohoic here (((ROOM-HUG))) love being here with you today. good topic ((alan)) turning it over. Funny but true story. A couple days ago I was doing some yard work, talking to God the whole time, wondering why He has left me unemployed for as long as I have been. Sure I can see all the good stuff that has come out of it, like being able to graciously receive, not being as SELF-reliant as I like to be, relying more on Him. teaching me to be more of a partner, Humbly asking others for help. (I like to be on the giving end cause that keeps me in control, when I'm on the receiving end, I'm not in control of anything, I dont like that feeling, being the alcoholic that I am) Finding that God wants others to experience the feeling of self-worth of giving, even if it makes me a little uncomfortable. The lesson that things don't make the person, the love for other people makes the person. Anyway working in the yard talking to God, so I ask Him, is it the fact that I haven't put this in my God Box the reason. That used to be an act that I had to perform that let me know that it had actually left my hand and was in His. Well, I took off my work gloves, found my best friends God Box (mine was stolen a couple months ago,along with a bunch of other stuff) anyway, got down on my knees, wrote job and the date on a piece of paper, told God this was all I could think of that I hadn't done with this situation. while chuckling placed it in that God Box, put my gloves back on, walked outside, the phone rang, the job I'd interviewed for a couple days before was mine if I wanted it. I have sent resumes and have interviewed so much it has become a game. all jobs I am qualified for and overqualified for. I am willing to go to any lengths, half measures aviail me nothing. Its easier to turn things over once I understand Who is in charge. It is so much easier today, than it was when I was new and not everything is a crisis anymore. Thanks to what you people have taught me, thank you family, -- STEP 1 - I can't STEP 2 - He can -- STEP 3 - So I think I'll let Him. Dear God please bless all who venture here, love and hugs, bon ==== bonzoc2@aol.com


Member: Kerry
Location: Michigan
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 2:37:38 PM

Comments

My name is Kerry. I am a alcoholic. I have not gone more than 4 days sober in the last 2 years. Today I start day 1. I hope to find the support I need here.


Member: Kerry
Location: Michigan
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 2:38:14 PM

Comments

My name is Kerry. I am a alcoholic. I have not gone more than 4 days sober in the last 2 years. Today I start day 1. I hope to find the support I need here.


Member: De HortonCore
Location: Tulsa , Ok
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 3:47:27 PM

Comments

Hi, my name is De , i am an alcoholic!! today i am sober .. i have not drank since 6/6/85. for that i am truly grateful.. ok enough of the AA quotes :) to Sandy P : please allow yourself some time to know who you are before you get into a relationship. we seem to get so involved with what we think others want us to be that we loose outselves in the process .. when i was new in sobriety i had nothing to give anyone .. and any man i met in treatment certainly had nothing to offer.. :Like Art , i know of some rare situations that work (congratulations! Art) but they are few and far between and as he stated alot of work,, and i think i needed to work on me more than anyone else .. Turning it over has come with time and alot of prayer and practice and with each new situation > a new "turning it over" we think that if we turn it over once that is all there is ,, not so !! each morning is a new "turn it over" i can not think for a moment that i am in control or i go nuts .. recent situation in my life proves the ultimate for me >> my son is going to prison for something he did not do .. >> i know we all say that but these are the facts .. i have to every day ask God for the strength to just live today . to do something good for another .. and to do His will. AA does not have all the answers there is outside help such as marriage counseling , parenting classes, doctors, lawyers , etc. and we are incouraged to seed these profeesionals .. so please do so . And the promises are a "result" of working the steps , we can not expect them to come true until we have "sought" through the steps ... Sorry once again i have taken too much space , thank you for allowing me to share ,,


Member: John.L
Location: Newark
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 4:10:49 PM

Comments

Hi all,,,Happy Belated Thanksgiving my names John Alkie / Addict

"Turning it over" is a good topic for me today cause it is something I have been working on. My life has been having it's up and down lately,,,but nothing wroth using over,,thats because I have been turning it all,and I do meen all to my higher power,,as well as talking about it with my sponsor,and other friends of mine in the program. This past Thanksgiving was definately a turn it over holiday for me..I went to my Family's for Dinner,,,,and being a member of the C.I.A. "Catholic,Irish,Alcoholics"it was definately a bit eary,,but I just said my serenity prayer,,and turned it all over instead of holding it in and dwelling on it.I got there a bit late and left early,,,but I went and I stayed sober,as well as had a good time,,and I made it to work the next day,,people have been saying the Holidays are a rough time,and there right,,but hey,,I didn't just drink on the Holidays,it just meens that other people would drink with me,,,I don't know if i'm making any sense to you,but this makes sense to me. So to close this out..let me just say..Let Go Let your understanding your God have it ,,,and just turn it over to him,,,that way you don't have to carry it around with you, It's working for me Today,,,and thats all i'm worried about getting through,Today Thanks for being here,,I couldn't do this alone,,and thats a fact, John.L Recovering Alkie/Addict and a Happy one Today


Member: Rich R, slowly recovering alcoholic/compulsive person :-)
Location: Detroit
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 4:21:25 PM

Comments

Turning it over is a GREAT topic for me. I don't seem to have a problem turning the alcohol over. My problem concerns my other "compulsions" one of which seems to be the Internet, spending WAY too much time online


Member: Roxanne C
Location: OR
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 5:22:32 PM

Comments

Hi - I'm Roxanne and I'm an alcoholic. Turning it over is where I am at today. I am in my 10th year of sobriety - but staying connected to the principals of this program continue to take conscious effort. Sobriety and a spiritual connection must maintain the number one priority in my life. At first it is putting the plug in the jug. Now it is about serenity and balance. I need to remember that I am not alone. And I need to remember that it is progress not perfection. Letting it go and remembering that I am not in charge gives me lots of serenity. There is a plan - and my self will is only in the way. Even thought things don't seem to work out as I would like them I can get to the place where I have joy in the fact that someone else up there knows more than I do- and I am not the center of the universe. (thank God) We will all be okay. We will all be alright. Hang in there, practice the presence, and love each other unconditionally. Thank you for listening. Roxanne


Member: richard m
Location: sarasota,fla
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 5:45:05 PM

Comments

my name is richard m .i am an alcoholic.....turning it over ..to me simply means .leting go and leting god deal with it......being humble ...etc.


Member: Tim K.
Location: New England
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 5:50:19 PM

Comments

Tim, alcoholic, also trying to learn how to turn it over.

For me, turning it over consists fundamentally of realizing that 1)if I drink, my life will be unmanageable 2) that I need to go to meetings and work the program, and 3) that my spiritual connection is essential to my recovery. The last is where I really work on turning it over, but I can't work on my spiritual connection if I'm drinking, it's like the pipeline is blocked.

Each person develops their own manner of connecting to a "higher power". I practice a type of meditation that consists of letting go...letting go of thoughts, feelings, judgments, selfishness, letting go of everything. The principle is that, when you truly let go and empty yourself of yourself, only then can you be filled with the spirit or the divine energy or whatever you call it. For me, learning to "turn it over" is a lifetime study, one that can be pursued every day, every hour, every minute.

The subtlety of the whole thing is that we cannot "let go" by an act of will, and most of us are pretty damn willful.


Member: Chris B.
Location: Central Texas
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 6:20:37 PM

Comments

Hi Y'all. I'm Chris and I'm an alcoholic What a Great Topic, Alan. It's just what I needed to hear and boy is it tough. I'm over 7 years sober and sometimes it feels like I'm just starting out. This is especially true when I "take control" or feel like I should be in control, which is the biggest lie I can ever put over on myself and others. Recently, I've been having to deal with some "opposition" in my job that is completely beyond my control; and I've been beating myself up over the last two weeks because I keep thinking that I should have the answers necessary to quell that opposing party and I don't. Worse yet, I have not been practiceing "restraint of pen and tongue" like the Big Book says I should do. I have gotten angry at the lies being thrown up by the opposition and the fact that the outcome seems certainly to be against me in the end. I've even been questioning the propriety of my being in my profession because of this situation and my lack of ability to deal with it. While I have known throughout this experience that I am not in control, I have balked at that fact; and struggled against the tide to "take back" control. What y'all have reminded me is that I cannot "take back" something that I never had in the first place. I only get to "come back" to God, to the Program and to you by realizing that I can not do anything alone. Bill, thanks for the sign. I'll add it to the one on my desk (that I obviously haven't paid much attention to lately): "God, help me remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that together you and I can't handle". Thanks for being here, guys - especially the newcomers. Keep coming back - it works if you work it.


Member: sarah m.
Location: washington
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 9:17:27 PM

Comments

my name is sarah and im an alcoholic, turning it over is something that i had to struggle with for a long time, i just didnt know how and was always afraid of doing it wrong(perfectionist!!!) over time and a few steps later that began to fade, i could talk to God and really have it come from my heart and not my head or someone elses mouth. every so often i have days where i just wont pray, even though i know i'd feel better, but for some reason i just want to cry and feel crappy for a while. id never talked to anyone about this even my sponsor and of course i thought i was unique! then about a month ago i was reading in the 12x12 of sometimes not being capable of praying, i cant remember the exact wording but it was exactly how i felt during those times. this just showed me once again that "its in the book"! and that sometimes its okay to feel like that just so long as i suround myself with my friends from the program to carry me along because i cant do it alone. have a nice day everyone!!


Member: Anu
Location: Deepsouth (USA)
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 9:25:14 PM

Comments

My name is Anu. I am a recoverying alcoholic coming up on nine years pretty soon. I've been working real hard at getting this thing right, but after I've done all I can do then I turn it over to my HP. Maybe I should reverse the process? I've been having a problem at work. I have been turning it over and over and over. To make a long story short on 18N0V at 6:00am a coworker fired 5 shots at me with a 9mm as I was walking to my car to go home. I didn't get hit. We got some new management down here and they are incompetent to say the least. I had no idea that I was going to get shot at, but there is as AA says those in the world that are sicker than we are. Excuse the 'melodrama'. I needed to share that bit of karmic balancing that my HP took over for me, and its been that way every since I first began turning it over. My HP has made my way easier though I keep making it hard. Will I ever learn to reverse the process? I do not have the interest to spend much time on the net,but this is a worthy cause. Hope that I was helpful to somebody, and if I bored you I hope you ignored me. Good-bye!!!


Member: sandy p
Location: wa
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 9:44:21 PM

Comments

turning it over wud somebody help me here ive been reading about turning it over lets get to the point here what are we turning over im at my first stages of recovery at 51 years of age just what are we turning over here am i lost to the whole program or can we get some real feeling going here


Member: sandy p
Location: wa
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 9:44:36 PM

Comments

turning it over wud somebody help me here ive been reading about turning it over lets get to the point here what are we turning over im at my first stages of recovery at 51 years of age just what are we turning over here am i lost to the whole program or can we get some real feeling going here


Member: Dave R.
Location: Pennsylvania
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 10:28:18 PM

Comments

Hi, I'm Dave, and I'm and alcoholic. "Turning it over" for me has always involved a big step in humility. Until I humble myself and accept that there are forces and events that I cannot control, I find that I cannot turn anything over. Sometimes just the simple physical act of getting on my knees puts me in the right frame of mind. I think this is true regardless of your view of a higher power. I don't have a traditional view of God, like many in these rooms do, but the act of praying forces me to put everything in perspective...thanks...


Member: Kristi J
Location: South GA
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 11:13:22 PM

Comments

Hi everyone! I'm a recovering alcoholic and have been sober for 3 years. It has been a deep enlightenment and a 360 change in my perception in "turning it over." Everyday when I wake up in the morning, my intention is to turn my will over to GOD (the divine source of love and positive energy). From that point on, I carry a deep sense of peace that all is well. Thanks!


Member: Big John M.
Location: Modesto, CA
Date: 11/28/99
Time: 11:36:54 PM

Comments

Hi, everybody. I'm John, a real alcoholic. Another great topic! Of course I've never known a bad topic. Just some I didn't care for at the time because of the discomfort of facing myself.

There has already been great personal, Program, and quotation sharing so I will just add two things in my daily routine that have helped me with "turning it over" when I have been able to do so. Being an imperfect human being I struggle with this concept at times, and, being an alcoholic, I struggle with control issues almost all the time.

Every morning when I am doing my reading, prayer and meditation bit, I devote some time and conscious effort to opening myself to my Higher Power's will. I spent a lot of my life trying to assert my will and I was miserable. Then, I tryed to allow other's wills into my life and things got even worse. The times when I am truly happy now are when I am working at knowing God's will and trying to do His will.

The other part of my daily routine happens just before I go to sleep. After my daily inventory I work at obtaining an "attitude of gratitude". Absolutely nothing in my life today worth anything such as: sobriety, friendships, relationships, peace, serenity, etc. etc. was obtained through the assertation of my will. I have worked at applying the principles of the Program to my daily living, but, the things of real value in my life today are gifts from my Higher Power. The "Grace", (undeserved gifts) of God in my life today is infinite if I can be open to it!

As I lay on my back and thank God for the many gifts he has given me today I am usually overwhelmed and the tears of gratitude run down the sides of my head and begin to fill my ears. This has made me laugh out loud at times. What a way to end the day!No matter how tedious or painful the day has been I can find gratitude. I can even be grateful for the opportunities for growth I have been exposed to if I make an effort in doing so.

I love this Program and my life in it today! I have been restless, irritable, and discontent today, but, after reading all your postings, and, adding what I needed to hear, I feel so much better. Better go make amends to my other half for being an old grouch today. Good night and God bless everyone!!


Member: Larry M.
Location: Virginia Beach
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 12:47:26 AM

Comments

Welcome back KERRY!

Turning over my life and will to the care of my higher power is something of a surrender. After fighting a losing battle with alcohol for many years, I finally had to surrender...and suddenly I won! The only way to win that battle was to stop fighting. The rest of life seems like that too. If I'm constantly fighting and struggling, I'm not happy, even if I get what (I think) I want. If I just let go and go with the flow, things seem to turn out much better.

The first step for me is to accept my situation, whatever it is at the time. Then I just try to do the next right thing, without projecting and worrying about the results. Over the years I have come to have faith that everything will be OK as long as I do the right thing. I also rely on the guidance I receive through maintaining conscious contact with my HP through meditation.

Peace & Serenity


Member: jenifer d
Location: england swings
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 1:22:24 AM

Comments

Kerry, all of us here just take it a day at a time, and we always will do that. So congratulations on being here 'just for today'. And tomorrow if you can maybe relax and turn the problem over to a power so high it can overcome anything, you will be fine again 'just for today'. That's how it has worked for me for a while now. Don't know how it works, but it sure does.


Member: LMC
Location: ARIZONA
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 1:47:26 AM

Comments

Hi Everyone, Thank you for the comments on turning it over. By the grace of a very loving God i have been sober for some time now, i know what to do to turn it over, i am angry at myself and my God and im not leaving it turned over and i am making myself sick becouse i can't controll the situtation. I am stuck between my anger and my fear and a serious lack of acceptance towards this situtation. I pray daily for God to do his wil and help me to accept it but i won't and i am still very angry and afraid , i don't even want to do the "next thing" and resent that i have to. I will start a new God box and ask for prayers from you to please help me to turn it over and accept Gods wil for me. Thank You for allowing me to share.


Member: Zac
Location: NZ
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 4:19:18 AM

Comments

Zac alcoholic here, turning it over only when it has me beaten most times. This usually coincides with knowing that I am powerless over compulsive thinking at times it's when I become aware that the turmoil subsides. Then surrender, then peace only God as I understand him can do this another way of describing this that there an awesome click inside .I am truly grateful for another days sobriety. Thanks everyone for your sharing,without you guys I cannot stay sober.


Member: Barbara W.
Location: Guam
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 5:40:50 AM

Comments

Hi, Barbara, an alcoholic here. Yes I definately need to turn this problem over to my higher power. I can not do it myself as I just discovered again yesterday with my Crash and Burn as I like to call it. Back to day-1!

Sandra P. and Kerry, I would like hearing more about your problems with early recovery attempts as I am in the same boat. I am using a work amail address so I don't want to give it here, but I plan to buy a home pc this week and will get my own email and then will provide it. If you wish to post yours I'll respond and give you my current one privately.

Kerry, I hope you go to a doctor before trying to detox yourself or you may not be able to withstand the physical withdrawal symptoms. That's probably what has been keeping you to within the first four days. Day-4 for me was always the clincher that drove me back to the next drink. After many attempts to quit on my own over a two year period I finally went to a doctor to get help to detox. I still have not made it all the way, only reached day-12, day-8 and day-7. but I am sure I will be able to get past this eventually. I'll pray for both of you.


Member: Fred M
Location: MD
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 7:23:23 AM

Comments

I'm Fred and I'm an alcoholic. Thanks, Alan, for the interesting topic. To me, turning it over is an issue of trust and practice. This is a personal example. Recently, I felt resentment at my wife, probably for something childish like she wasn't spending enough time with me or paying enough attention to me. I stewed in this resentment for an hour or two, then realized this was not healthy. I prayed to God like this: "God, I don't want to feel this way. These feelings are not in your teachings, and are not good for me. Please take away this anger and resentment, and restore my feelings of love and gratitude. And thank you, God, for all the blessings you send me every day. Amen." Within an hour, my prayer was answered, and the bad feelings were gone. It took me a lot of years sober to even realize how I was feeling and that the healthiest state for me to be in is one of peace and serenity. It took several more years to realize that I could control my feelings with God's help. All I had to do was ask. It once dawned on me that if he could get a drunk like me sober, maybe he could help me control my anger. It worked and taught me to trust him and just turn it over. Thanks for letting me share. Love, Fred


Member: Michelle D.
Location: Indiana
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:02:29 AM

Comments

Hi. Michelle here, an alcoholic who has had monthes of recovery only to relapse- now on my third day of recovery. Right now, I am definitely "turning it over" because I cannot do it myself. I have tried and failed countless numbers of times- I have "turned it over" and then when feeling the "pink cloud", taken it "back." I know I can't do that, even though it is hard. I am really scared of this recovery thing- I have had so so many years of relapse- Thanks for being there.


Member: MARY K
Location: BOSTON
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:21:15 AM

Comments

HI ALL! Mary, alcy. Great topic. We think we control and God smiles. The things we do to ourselves!!

Ya know the serenity prayer? Here's the short version: F_ _ K IT !!!!!

Short story: Sam was travelling from NY to California via train. He knew the weather would be changing many times during his trip. He put together 5 outfits each for rain, sleet, snow, humidity, etc. etc. After many days of planning, packing, unpacking and packing again Sam had 9 suitcases full. Satisfied that he had it all covered Sam boarded his train (all suitcases in tow) and began his journey. Ten days later he arrived at his destination.

MORAL: You will ultimately reach your destination REGARDLESS OF HOW MUCH OR HOW LITTLE baggage you choose to carry !!!!!

No human has it perfect. PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION!!!! Each day is a new beginning.

God bless all.


Member: Art H.
Location: Midwest
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:27:42 AM

Comments

Hi all, my name is Art & I am an alcoholic. Relapse I have learned for me is one of the symtoms of alcoholism. Between 1971 & 1977 I relapsed between 8 & 10 times. My last drink was in 1977. I am not sure what the differance is now compared to when I kept relapsing.

Allot has to do with not giving up on myself. And in looking back I see for me A.A. was not enough, don't get me wrong, I needed A.A. & still do to stay sober. When I started to get help for other problems I had along with my being an alcoholic the relapses stopped.

I was a sick puppy as the saying goes. When I opened up to that fact recovery became allot easyer & even fun. Love to all, & by for now.


Member: Tim V.
Location: Treasurer
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:58:27 AM

Comments

We have no dues or fees, but please visit "Pass the Hat" and help support this meeting, if you are an alcoholic who practices the 12 Traditions.


Member: test
Location: test
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 10:07:42 AM

Comments

test


Member: jerry n Great Bender
Location: NEPA
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 11:26:55 AM

Comments

Hi, my name is Jerry and I am an alcoholic. It's gresat to be here, and thanks to all who shared. "Turning it over" is a great topic, and an essential part of my walk in recovery. When I was new to the rooms, it was a real difficult thing to understand. I was often going to my home group and bringing up the topic of "acceptance". The winners were always discussing powerlessness and turning it over. I was getting pissed that these people, who I thought were there to help, weren't even listening. I 've since learned the First Step mentions that our lives are unmanageable, with a drink and without a drink. There is a power in control of all the outcomes of our actions. It is only our thoughts that we are able to control. A wise old timer once told me, " GOD's will will be done, with or without my permission". Today I try to rememember that and I am reminded that I am not in control. Before I was able to recognize a loving God in my daily affairs, turning things over was something I reserved only for major crises in my life, not seeing my children, my father dying from cancer, and being harresed by the local police because of personal relationship my estranged wife was having with the chief. It definitely was the yo-yo variety of letting go, I held the string and pulled it back many times. Even then,though,I was able to see that when I was able to let it go, the mental obsession (what I call a mental toothache) was relieved to the point where the banging between my ears was a lot more tolerable. Step Three took me more than two years of practice before I was able to make a decision, I was afraid of what his will might be for me, would I become a missionary or a monk, would I be required to become a saint, did I have to stop repeating off color jokes, etc., but then my sponsor was patient enough to point out that this step required no action. It was only a matter of accepting where you are, today, and being in God's will not my own. I stopped praying in the same fashion when I did my morning reflections. Whereas, I used to tell God where I wanted to be and what I wanted to do that day, I began to ask God to put me where He chose and to help me see what he wants me to do. From that perspective I was able to more readily accept more of the day. Step Seven really gave me a key when it tells me that by self forgetting one can find themselves. I truely believe every one of the Twelve Steps are helpful tools in the process of turning things over. The spitual awakening for some of us is a slow learning process but what is revealed on the path will take us further. I, also, found turning it over is easier when "it"is recognized. Some days I find my head is up my ass the world looks like shit and I don't know why. Turning it over is more difficult, but the lessons showed by this program still applies if I chose to use them. I don't want to take up too much time or space ( I probably have already), but I need to share my experience, today, with turning it over. I was diagnosed with cancer two weeks ago, and I was schedukled to have a gland removed this morning. The surgeon got caught behind a 10 car pile up on the Interstate and was unable to make it. I am reschelduled for Friday. This is not a situation I find favor with, but by turning it over, I can see that, perhaps, there is a good reason I did not have surgery today. I try to remember that as a mere human I am unable to see the big picture, and as a mortal I am unable to direct the show. Thanks for letting me share. I hope everyone has a good, or at least tolerable 24.


Member: "Yawn" R.
Location: Auburn, CA
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 12:15:56 PM

Comments

My name is "Yawn" and I'm an alcoholic. Boy do I have a burning desire. Last night I was watching a late-night talk show, which is actually a radio talk show but also airs on one of the popular cable channels. The theme is usually the same - young pretty girls come in, take off their clothes and do or say something which (I guess) entertains the show host and men in general. No, I'm not going off on outside issues, so I'm not breaking traditions. What did bother me last night was that he (the talk show host) had this one girl on the show who was obviously loaded. She supposedly had twenty-two shots of tequila and four Valium. To be fair to the talk show host, he did ask her if she was an alcoholic, which she denied. As the show progressed, this poor girl began to perform and do some pretty wild things on national television (all under the influence of alcohol and drugs). The whole thing was hard to watch. This young girl was obviously sick, and to present her on TV this way was very sad. It was kind of like putting on display a cancer victim in a carnival freak show, and everyone having a good laugh. The whole thing brought tears to my eyes. I pray to God that this girl gets help, and I also pray that society will no longer use sick people (like alcoholics) for their enterainment purposes.

Thank you for letting me share.


Member: Lynn C.
Location: Southern Illinois
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 2:42:33 PM

Comments

Hello, Lynn here Alcoholic,

Thank you for the topic Alan, How to Turn it Over?

My early experience in recovery on turning it over was more like a how not to turn it over lesson. It has always been easy to turn it over as long as the outcome is What I want, Where I want it, How I want it and When I want it (which was usually yesterday). That may sound crazy, but that is what I was really doing for my first couple of years in the fellowship. Then when things didn't go my way I would blame the Higher Power or come to the conclusion that I wasn't worthy of any thing better. The worst part of all this was that I didn't even realize I was doing it. I still do this occasionally but not nearly as often as I used too. Fortunately for me at least, the longer I work this program the harder it gets for me to believe my own BS.

For me the missing element was (and some times still is) Trusting in something or any thing outside of myself. My lack of trust is usually based in Fear that I won't get what I think I need or that I will lose what I think I have. My experience in working this program has proved my theories Wrong many times over. When I am able to trust just a little bite then I find that I get exactly what I need when I need it. His will not mine has always worked out better then I could have dream.

Your fellow trudger on the happy road to destiny,

Lynn C. in Southern Illinois


Member: Leisa V.
Location: New York
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 3:02:53 PM

Comments

Hi,Leisa here & I believe I'm an alcoholic. My mother is one & I've been struggling with this all my life & the pain that my mother has caused me has been the big excuse I've used to drink myself. So, as far as turning it over, I have yet to begin. It is so hard to go forward & I do not want to lose the one & only person who has ever loved me in my life. I hope I can do this.


Member: Ro B.
Location: Balto.
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 3:07:53 PM

Comments

Im Ro, alcoholic. When I first got sober a few years ago, I used prayer an awful lot. Mostly the serenity prayer and the Lords prayer. Acceptance and gratitude make it possible for me to turn it over. I have to accept that whatever happens, will happen because it is Gods will for me .That doesn't mean that I have to like it, but I can rest assured that it is what is best for me in the long run. I may not always get what I want, but I always have gotten what I need...


Member: Patrick W.
Location: Knoxville, Tn.
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 3:39:54 PM

Comments

Patrick Grateful Alcoholic On the subject of turning it over: The question I have is . If it is difficult to turn matters over to God Then dosen't it make total spiritual logic that maby it din't need turning over in the first place. All things belonging to God are already his. It may make more sense to ask GOD to do his will, in his time. When it is in his time and his will and you have made yoursellf ready to accept it(humility). There will be no struggle(only Peace) and you will know serenity. It all takes faith as best I can tell. The struggle comes from trying to get something from God that he is not ready to give.


Member: Jim C.
Location: Anaheim, Calif.
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 6:59:29 PM

Comments

My name is Jim, and I'm an alcoholic. Turning it over, for a lot of people is a tough concept. Our nature is to keep taking it back and trying to do the job of our higher power. A sponsor once told me that once I turned something over, I might try letting God do his job.

This is where faith comes in. After years of practice, I have enough faith in God, to be able to stand back(most of the time) and allow his will to be done. By and large, the situation turns out the way it is supposed to, but not always the way I want.

It has been a real freedom to be able to allow the will of my Higher Power, to be done without having to put my two cents in all of the time. This has only come through constant practice. Even today, after 19 years, it is not always easy. It is getting better though, and I am grateful to this program for giving me the tools by which I can live this kind of life.

My sponsor also told me that, My job is doing God's business, and God's business is taking care of me. Who better to handle such a chore??

Everyone take care, and I hope that all of you had a wonderful holiday.


Member: HUNTER C.
Location: SANTA MONICA,CA
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:36:19 PM

Comments

HELLO, I TOO CAN RELATE TOO HAVING DIFFICULTY IN TURNING THINGS OVER.I HAVE BEEN SOBER FOR 7 MONTHS AND 24 DAYS.I WILL HAVE 8 MONTHS ON THE 5TH OF DECEMBER IF I MAKE IT.MY PROBLEM IS TURNING OVER ANGER AND RESENTMENTS FROM THE PAST.NOT ONE DAY HAS PASSED SINCE I GOT SOBER THAT I HAVED BROODED OVER SOME PERSON OR EVENT THAT HAS HAPPENED IN MY LIFE.I READ IN THE BIG BOOK THAT RESENTMENT IS THE NUMBER ONE OFFENDER.I ALSO READ THAT ANGER MAY BE THE DUBIOUS LUXURY OF NORMAL BUT TO THE ALCOHOLIC IT IS POISON.I REALLY BELIEVE THAT TO BE TRUE.I DO NOT HAVE ANY POSSIBLE CONCEIVABLE RECOLLECTION OF HOW MANY TIMES I GOT DRUNK TO RELIEVE THE AGONY OF BEING CONSUMED BY ANGER.SO I REALLY CAN'T OFFER ANY ADVICE TO ANYONE ON TURNING ANYTHING OVER.I TOO AM REALLY STRUGGLING WITH IT.I JUST MOVED HERE TO CALIFORNIA IN SEPTEMBER.IT HAS NOT BEEN EASY TO ADJUST CONSIDERING I AM FROM NORTH CAROLINA AND WHEN I GOT HERE I WAS ONLY 5 MONTHS AND 8 DAYS SOBER.BUT IT HAS GOTTEN BETTER ALONG WITH MOST EVERYTHING ELSE IN MY LIFE THANKS TO AA.


Member: HUNTER C.
Location: CALIFORNIA
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:43:52 PM

Comments

P.S.PLEASE FORGIVE FOR ANY WORDS LEFT OUT OR MISPELLINGS.I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO TYPE.THANKS!


Member: HUNTER C.
Location: CALIFORNIA
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:45:24 PM

Comments

P.S.PLEASE FORGIVE FOR ANY WORDS LEFT OUT OR MISPELLINGS.I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO TYPE.THANKS!


Member: Trish L.
Location: Hyannis,Ma
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 9:52:25 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, I`m Trish a grateful recovering alcoholic, Great topic.I didn`t really have a hard time with turning it over to god,as I understand him,after seeing the horrible mess I had made in my life, how bad could it get? Since learning to turn my will over to god and let him do as he sees fit I never had so much peace in my heart. I`m here to do the footwork, he`ll take care of the rest. For this drunk its about the 12+12 and using my sponsor and listening to those who have come before me. All I do is keep the faith and stay close to the fellowship.


Member: Michael B.
Location: AZ
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 10:22:19 PM

Comments

Hi! My name is Michael, and I am a recovering alcoholic, sober today only by the grace of God and the Fellowship. Welcome to the newcomers! And thanks everyone for sharing on an excellent topic!

"Turning it over" has been just another principle of the AA proram that reminds me this is a program of progress, not perfection. Of course, "turning it over" essentially revolves around Step 3, which, like other Steps, we must practice daily.

Although I can make the decision daily to "turn it over" to God as I understand Him, my struggle here revolves around my faith. When I'm under pressure, I tend to let fear make the decisions for me rather than faith--that is, my will, not His.

Fortunately, when I just don't pick up that first drink and when I practice the principles of the AA program to the best of my ability, I can and do become more consistent about "turning it over," though the progress here for me is usually marked by a rocky road as opposed to one of steady, measured progress.


Member: sandy p
Location: WA
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 10:50:22 PM

Comments

leisa, i feel for you i can relate to what you are saying. My dads an alcoholic and we know down deep inside we have been the "chosen one" to carry on the gene. We are in a very hard situation but from years and years of experience, its time to do whats best for yourself, go with your heart your mom will always love you, she has her own fears and guilt, just don't ever pass the blame, cuz there is no blame thats why we need a HP and thats why we have such a hard time. think about it why would a HP pass on so much pain. To Barbara i think Im the last one you want to hear from I havent and can't turn it over I'm relapsing big time here. I have no feeling in a HP right now It's not that I don't have belief its just that I have trouble with Intangibles. And oh can we get rid of the "mikes and get some real rapport going here, we are sick breed without breeding another sick breed, is this the computer doing this? i hope not there is enough crap out there so let the crap join the crap and let the Alkies have their own line we are serious people even with our jokes we are on a mission and a life saving one. Thank you all I'm new but I keep checking and somehow some way you have helped me.


Member: Ladd G.
Location: Wetumpka Alabama
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 11:37:03 PM

Comments

Hi Im Ladd alocoholic,It really does my heart good to see and here so many other drunks in so many ways doing and trying to do the same things.Ive been sober almost 5 years now(and in the program almost 10) for the ones who keep slipping,just keep comeing back.I like the part in the X,s and I,s that talks about how of the ones who come and really try about 50% get and remain sober the first time,about 25% get and stay after a few slips,it also says that even of the ones who never stay sober there lives seem to get better. That is quite a bit of hope there are times when I get so cought up in the stuff that I forget,all I asked god to do in the begining was to help me stay sober.There are times that I forget(that is turning it over)if I make 24,then I give thanks and ask for help with the next 24.Its that simple,thats why its so hard at times. We will all change if we just dont drink and work the 12 (not all at once,just constant) the hardest thing for me to remember can be-easy does it-first things first and keep it simple.Friends If folks like us dont drink,its not going to be OK,it is OK. The promises come true for us all,thay come in Gods time which is rarly fast enough for a drunk. Thanks for being here I needed you tonight young and old to remind me Im right were Im supose to be...Love Ladd


Member: robert j.
Location: sunporch
Date: 11/29/99
Time: 11:39:01 PM

Comments

Alot of good shares, especially from the new people. Sometimes I have to get pretty beat up by a situation before I remember to ask for help, the funny thing is I usually get reminded by an AA friend who's been through a similar experience. Seems to me, thats a big part of AA...sharing our experience, strength and hope with other alcoholics, the magical thing about an AA meeting is that if I listen closely...this power greater than me,speaks to me ,through you guys...take it easy, go to meetings, get a sponsor, work the steps and read the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, this thing works , take care.


Member: sandy p
Location: Wa
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 1:08:14 AM

Comments

Ladd, I'm one of the ones who will probably never stay sober but gets better. the only thing I ever asked GOD or my HP Or whatever was to hold my hand and guide me through the times good or bad. I can truthfully say that most of the time my prayers were answered now its up to me and me alone. I can't ask anything of anyone other than to love me for who & what I am. I can,t ask AA or you or the next person to help me see what I am doing to myself. I only ask you all to listen and love me when I go down with the ship THANK YOU


Member: dwight s
Location: mt vernon wash
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 3:33:53 AM

Comments

im dwight and im an alcoholic it seems to be the nature of the beast im up aginst I come to aa with my but kicked get a sponser work the steps go to meetings dayly the promises start to happen in my life and i start to forget the dalema im up aginst and then the solution start to slip away.that for me is when i start thinking about turning it over but i dont untel ive made a real mess of my life and taken a fue poeple down with me pain that seams to be the real motivator for this egomaniac the big book always brings me back


Member: Dean S.
Location: Phoenix
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 3:56:57 AM

Comments

Hi! My name is Dean and I am an alcoholic. Of course I am no different and turning it over to God as I understand Him is not as easy as turning pancakes. However it should and would be if I were practicing all twelve steps of our program of recovery from this all too often fatal disease that is responsible for the creation of this wonderful fellowship of AA.

Alan, as has already been pointed out it is the third step that so many of us have gotten hung up on. All that step says is that we made a decision. It does not say that we did it----only that we decided to do it. Do what? Turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand Him. How do we do that? By saying the third step prayer found in the big book, and of course doing it with our sponsor,spouse or some other person who is interested in our progress in recovery. Then on to working steps four through twelve to the best of our ability on a daily basis.

I find it necessary to place the first word of step ten in front of all the steps. I can only stay sober by CONTINUING to do all of these steps.

Sobriety did not come easy for me, but without it I would not be here today and I am very grateful for all God as I understand Him has given me. I thank Him for AA everyday and I thank you, Dear Reader, for allowing me to share. I love you. Peace.


Member: Paul Q
Location: Toronto
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 7:56:50 AM

Comments

I heard that for years in AA ! Turn It Over.....

Well who started that one........No doubt the people who never followed the PATH laid down in the Big Book by the 100.....

It was only through intense study of the Big Book and following that course of VIGOROUS ACTION that the committee in my head was fired by GOD........

I have recovered from a seemingly hopless state of MIND, BODY and SOUL....

When things pop I know precisely what to do to get FREE.......this is taught its not caught...and it takes alot of work ..... Something we alcoholics do not like.....

Love and Service pquigley@sprint.ca


Member: Dry in the Desert
Location: Nevada
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 8:42:08 AM

Comments

Good Morning Everyone, My name is Walter and I am an Alcoholic !

Welcome to all the newcomers, We are glad you are here !

There are a few of the Spiritual Tool given to us in this program that are somewhat intangible and linked to Trust and Faith. "Turning IT(?) Over" and "Letting Go" are the ultimate tests of your Faith. We have spoken a great deal of Honesty in that past two weeks, and I truely believe that the true test of "Going to Any Length" deals with that self-honesty concerning your own understanding of God and your Spiritual Fittness. When things are going well, it is very easy to see God's Will, but during adverse times, one must really let go and trust. Longevity in Sobriety will brings untold miracles and make it a natural part of Sober Life to expect God's Guidance through difficult and confusing situations. Thanks for letting me share and for being here for me. To the newcomers, Keep Coming Back!!


Member: Larry H
Location: WA
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 2:11:31 PM

Comments

Hi, my name's larry and im an alcoholic. I believe that we have no choice but to "turn it over". There is so little in life that we have absolute control over. Life happens-with or without our permission. The universe is unfolding exactly the way it should, and in spite of the pain, suffering, and chaos, the world is a beautiful place full of wonderful souls. My biggest challenge in life is to get out of ME and into the world. We CAN do together what we could never do alone... Love to you all... For Sandy P.: There are plenty of life preservers on the ship!!


Member: Arlene C
Location: Eastren Washington.
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 2:59:02 PM

Comments

Hi, My name is Arlene, I am an alclholic. I am new to the internet, but not to this wonderful fellowship. I live in a very remote area, and the winter roads sometimes hamper my meeting attendence. Being on line will be great. as for turning it over--I must always remember that doing it my way got me drunk, sick and wanting to die. When I keep that thought foremost in my mind, it USUALLY is not too hard to remember that I don't know what's good for me and "Let go and let God" becomes easier.


Member: quiet bill
Location: arizona
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 5:22:00 PM

Comments

Hello Sandy P well about that hearing, i had 62%coprehension left ear and 90 % right and that was in 1987. so i got a left hearing aid, joined AA in 1989, read lips missedthe laughter sometimes, missed the input for me in particular sometimes, accepted the program, did the 1st 5 steps in about 6 months took the antabuse for a month, let go of this and that, let HP run me and don`t drink. Now we know that hearing continues to deteriorate so here i am still reading lips missing this and that , but not drinking 10years Once a blind man came into a meeting and i learned that day that i wasn`t a poor me ever again. SO i`m 64 yrs. old,always generally happy, not stupid and arrogant and really screwedup one day at a time.We got a lot to be thankful for. This computer system is a lot of help but we know that meetings are the best for us, hope you find one soon. Didn`t drink yesterday "thank God for yesterday" my best


Member: laura g
Location: by the sea
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 6:47:10 PM

Comments

there are no coincidences with god.my heart is heavy having lost my sobriety recently, and i made a phone call late this afternoon to my closest friend in the rooms and together we read 84-88 in the big book, and the discussion we had was about turning it over. i have never visited this website before now and this is just another example of the power of this program. i would be lying if i said that i didn't feel both a touch of sadness and shame, but not enough to keep me from the path that i belive is my spiritual growth. maybe i just forgot to be grateful for my sobriey, maybe this was necessary for my path this time. visiting this site has given me a gift as well.i love this program and hp and i have been given a gift in this visit.pray for me.back at cha.


Member: glenn .r
Location: nv
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 7:40:02 PM

Comments

hi everyone ive been in and out for some years had 7yr at one time but since its been tuff i tried to die about 4mths ago didnt workbut now i wish i were dead now i broke up with lovely lady or she me now wa wa wa anyway this is the first time ive done the computer thing easier than facing any one and crying for an hour.well she now wants nothing to do with me. wawawa. i was to smart to listen i was told by my sponser well here i am hurting and about 4months sober or dry but im preying my ass off this after my suicide attm ive gotta listen or give up glenn


Member: glenn .r
Location: nv
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 7:40:36 PM

Comments

hi everyone ive been in and out for some years had 7yr at one time but since its been tuff i tried to die about 4mths ago didnt workbut now i wish i were dead now i broke up with lovely lady or she me now wa wa wa anyway this is the first time ive done the computer thing easier than facing any one and crying for an hour.well she now wants nothing to do with me. wawawa. i was to smart to listen i was told by my sponser well here i am hurting and about 4months sober or dry but im preying my ass off this after my suicide attm ive gotta listen or give up glenn


Member: Caroline
Location: Texas
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 8:39:14 PM

Comments

Hi Everyone! Turning it over? Many times it helps to ask myself "What exactly am I turning over?" Is it my control? My family? People? And lately it gets down to expectations. Today and yesterday I have been really working on letting go of expectations, and outcomes. Sometimes it helps to admit that I am not ready to let go of my expectations. In that case I do not"let go" but I "let Up"..... Trust is difficult in early recovery - and even later sometimes. But what are my choices? I can be miserable and not trust God - always picking up resentments, living in fear. Or, I can trust a greater plan. Turning it over is not a phrase I really lean on, because it is not a good visual for me. What I like, is seeing something in my mind. Letting Go works for me. I can gradually relax, and review my options in any circumstance, and then, when I choose to trust a greater plan.......I can let go. It is not my job to spend time trying to change things that cannot be changed. People for instance. I know I was never going to change on someone elses suggestion. It took my desire to accept my problems, and my willingness to make the changes neccesary. As an alcoholic who wants contented sobriety, that means nothing - absolutely nothing comes before my recovery...I have, am, and will always (One Day At a Time)be committed to the steps. Nothing can take away the power I have received from the steps - from my Higher Power......If you are new - this program can change your life, but you have to be willing to put it first. Put half as much effort into your recovery as you put into your drinking, and you may make it...I hope you do. Best to All One Day At A Time - Caroline


Member: Letty C.
Location: PA
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 10:13:11 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, Letty, Alcoholic, I want to thank everyone who shared there is definitely a lot of experience, strength & hope that was freely given. Turning "it" over has had its ups and downs. This step is hard when I'm in the woods but the reward on the other side has been more than I could have planned while running the show myself. The answer that I received when searching has been "Step 11" ..which when I first hear it it is only an understanding that ok I have to open up the channel..actually practicing step 11 seems to be where my procrastination comes in. I'm a busy person and subconsciously I tend to think everything else that is tangible is priority..as someone else mentioned ..a change in perspective can do the trick. One day at a time things change the way they are supposed to and today I just try to accept that and stay grateful for what HP has blessed me with..sobriety, a roof over my head, food to eat, etc. etc. As time goes by, my faith that HP will works things out continues to grow and I can recall 1 time just recently when that faith was rock solid, it was very cool!! It gets easier when we truly let go and let God.


Member: Eileen H
Location: Queens, NY
Date: 11/30/99
Time: 11:11:06 PM

Comments

Hello, all. Eileen here . . . alcoholic. I'm not sure. I always thought that "Turn it over" meant that when you felt like drinking you turned that thought over to GOD . . . and DIDN'T drink. Sure, it may be hard to not drink at that point that you wanted it. Were thinking of it . . . and so . . . you turned that thought over to someone else. You called an AA buddie instead. You went to a meeting instead. You got busy doing something else . . . anything but drink.

To me . . . that's what turning it over is all about. That you won't drink. And that you'll get through . . . you'll get by whatever it is that's happening to you at that particular moment by "Turning Over" those thoughts of drinking or drugging.

Works for me. One day at a time . . . I've made 8 months sober by turning those drinking thoughts over to AA.

Thanks for letting me share.


Member: DonF
Location: nh
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 1:02:09 AM

Comments

Don, recovering alky Turn it over? Everything I ever let go of had claw marks all over it. It won't happen overnight. It will take time for us to truly desire the "fruits of the spirit" which are love, joy, peace, kindness, generosity, openness, humility, faithfulness, self-control, and patience. We alkys have always been into the "fruits of the flesh" which are lust, hatred, ego, pleasure, anger, gossip, selfish ambition, envy, and yes, drunkenness. That's what spirituality is, and it takes time to catch on to how it differs from religion.


Member: Larry H
Location: WA
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 2:34:01 AM

Comments

hi folks, we dont have any choice but to turn it over.We, as human beings, have very little, if any, control over life. Life happens. With or without our consent.When im in control of my life, i get me to where i am today--a confused,seeking,searching,lost individual. When i "let go and let God", I accept life on life's terms. What other choice is there? There is very little I can do to change the world.. I can either accept it, change my perception of it, or do what i can to change it. Getting sober is only the beginning, my friends. It's not what you lose in life that matters, it's what you leave behind.


Member: laura g
Location: by the sea
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 8:45:58 AM

Comments

Good morning, Laura here, grateful to be speaking with another alcoholic this morning. "Turning it Over" is exactly where I am in my program, my life and everything in between. I sometimes play the willful game, but to no avail. Turning it over is my key to the lock, but in truth sometimes is easier said than done. I have recently been reaquainted with my own alcoholism, and believe me it sits in wait in a sheer second in time. Turning it over seems to have a more respectful meaning for me personally. I feel grateful to be able to discuss this with a group of people who know of exactly what I speak. Taking the time to honor oneself by truly turning it over is the first gift of the program. We are lucky people to have the prgram in our lives and hearts.


Member: Patti W.
Location: RI
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 12:16:48 PM

Comments

HI family, I'm Patti, alcoholic in recovery. I have 8 years today!!!!! I've read lots of good stuff. Not much to add. My issues, too, have claw marks. I just have to work my program, trust a power greater than myself, and talk to another alcoholic. I've gotten away from attending meetings due in part to my work schedule, so this is a new way to connect. I need it. Thanks God and program for my recovery and for letting me share. P.


Member: Paul B
Location: Cambridge,Ontario
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 12:19:05 PM

Comments

Hello Everyone

Great topic Allen. I think turning it over is all about trust. Recently I have been working on my fourth step and had trouble with it. I got on this "kick" about understanding trust, as I tend to do about things I don't understand. I realized at some point in my life, I made a descision not to trust anyone but me. I think it was an instinctual response to the hurt I had suffered through trusting the wrong people. If I don't trust them, they can't hurt me. That kept me sick a long time. So I have realized recently that I didnt trust God. And I have to. I think it is that trust in God that allows us to be truly fearless in our fourth. All the times that I take back my will, or not paying attention to my conscience, I am in fact not trusting in Gods will for me. Its not easy to trust, it can be uncomfortable knowing you may be vulnerable, but I KNOW I must trust God.


Member: Andi
Location: WI
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 12:52:25 PM

Comments

Andi here and alocholic. What does turning it over really mean? I go to many meetings and hear people throw that statement out all the time. But when many of these people are asked what it really means and how to actually work on doing it, I have gotten this blank look like I am nuts or something and I never really get an answer that makes any sense.

My current friend (sponsor) has helped to me find my own way of practicing this concept. The whole thing for me is I believe that God is within me every single second of the day. I ask God everyday to help me to know what I need to be doing in order to make me whole. Then I listen to that little voice or feeling within me that gives me my answer. Many times the answer shows up in words from various people, or events that occur in certain places or just things appearing in my life and then that voice or feeling within me hounds me until I recognize the answer. I use to wait for others to tell me what to do or expected the burning bush to appear and each time I was very disappointed.

The truth is that I am given choices to make in everyday life. I can chose to listen to old tapes that people and situations have conditioned me to play in my head or I can chose to listen to that little voice or feeling within (God) that says this is what keeps you true to yourself. I am whole, content, joyous and complete only when I am true to myself. This for me is turning it over to God. It is even written on our own AA logo. "To Thine Own Self be True."


Member: Steve F.
Location: Wenham, Massachusetts
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 2:29:36 PM

Comments

Steve, alcoholic

I had trouble understanding Step 3 when I first started in AA. I didn't know what it meant to turn my life and my will over to the care of God.

Someone suggested I read Step 11 with Step 3. In Step 11, it is suggested that we pray only for the knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry it out. That's what I do now, every morning. I add a little something to it - I say "If you do that for me today God, I will do the rest." That reminds me that the 12 Step recovery program is a program of action - actions that I have to take.

I like what Andi had to say on the subject. Asking God for the knowledge of his will for us is only the first step - we do need to watch and/or listen for the answer.


Member: KEN     N.
Location: KELOWNA        B.C.
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 4:57:32 PM

Comments

i WOULD LIKE TO WISH EVERYBODY A CLEAN & SOBOR XMAS THIS YEAR. PLEASE BRING IN 2000 WITH LOTS OF LOVE & PRAYERS FOR THE PERSONS STILL SUFFERING OUT THERE ? I DO HOPE EVERYBODY THE BEST IN THE NEW YEAR THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME SHARE


Member: Tom P.
Location: NE Iowa
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 6:02:23 PM

Comments

My name is Tom and I am an alcoholic. My sponser passed on to me that turning it over is like throwing in the towel. However, rather than throwing in the whole thing sometimes I have to tear of a strip and throw it in; then another and so on. I guess what I'm saying is it takes time and patience and practice. I didn't start growing in this program til I got a sponser and listened to what he said. Relationships are wonderful opportunities to practice the principles of this program but I must have a pretty good handle on what these principles are before I get into one.


Member: glenn r.
Location: nv.
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 6:51:43 PM

Comments

hi everyone im glenn r alcy and i to understand that turning it over is to god thats why im alive today thank god that there is somthing that i can do rite now im so vewry sad thank u to g.r


Member: SuzyQ
Location: NJ
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 7:41:42 PM

Comments

Sue-alcoholic. I don't drink any more, but that doesn't mean my thinking is always sober. When I get some sort of problem pop up in life, or in my own mind, I ask God to show me the answers. I can be a self-pitying b---- now and again so it can take me a few days, alot of suffering and a meeting or two till I remember that it is as easy as asking God to handle my problems. Most of the time after I turn it over to God I can let it go and eventually the answer comes. Sometimes the minute I turn it over I see clearly that the answer was in front of me the whole time. I am stubborn. I can only say that I don't want to know where I might be had I not turned my whole life over to Him. I'm feeling much better now!


Member: PINTO F
Location: TEXAS
Date: 12/1/99
Time: 9:36:35 PM

Comments

HEY YALL PINTO HERE, BEEN SOBER FOR A WHILE AND JUST MADE IT TO STEP EIGHT. AND HAVE A REAL HARD TIME OF DEALING WITH IT BECAUSE i HAVE MADE AMENDS TO ALL THAT IS CLOSE TO ME. ALTHOUGHT, THERE IS ONE THING THAT I HAVE NOT MADE AMENDS TO IS MY ARMY SERVICE. I SPENT 5 YEARS IN THE ARMY AS AND ALCOHOLIC IN GERMANY AND THEN WAS HONORABLE DISCHARGED. GOT HOME AND WAS AFFAIRD (22 YEARS OLD) BECAUSE I WAS A DRUNK. STAYED OUT FOR 28 DAYS REENLISTED, AND WENT AWOL GOT A DISHONORABLE DISCHARGE AND STAYED DRUNK FOR ANOTHER 15 YEARS. I HAVE NEVER SHARED THAT WITH ANYONE. MY WIFE OF 10 YEARS DO NOT KNOW OF MY PAST. REAL KICKER IS THAT HER FIRST HUSBAND WAS KILLED IN VEIT NAM. I AM UP S____CHREEK. I WANT TO COME CLEAN WITH HER. PINTO F.PINTO


Member: Bob M.
Location: Spokane, WA
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 1:12:33 AM

Comments

It seems to me that the fellow with the 32 days starting to work his 4th step might want to take a little more time. Get a sponsor and may be by the end of the year worry about the 4th step. I was in a small town in Oregon on a construction job, I went into a hall and ther was a poster on the wall. The poster said "Thank you God for teaching me how to laugh, I already knew how to cry. God Bless Go to a lot of meetings over the holidays.


Member: Jean-Claude T.
Location: Belgium
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 3:53:45 AM

Comments

My name is JC and I’m an alcoholic.

Thanks for the topic, Alan. Turning it over hasn’t been a big deal for me. When I came to AA for help, I realized that with my group backing me up, I could live without alcohol, one day at a time. I was told to share my daily problems around the table or with one particular friend (sponsor). Did it and discovered it helped me. I could get it off my chest and did receive objective suggestions about my problems. I wasn’t lookin’ for no God, just wanted to live through life without the need of a drink. That Group Of Drunks was sufficient for me at that time.

When I began to ask me some questions about how I came in contact with AA and some co´ncidences happening in my life, it was time for me to search for another “Power Greater Than Myself”. Found the God of my childhood back. I just turned it on to him since then (specially for the things I have to accept with serenity). But I still share my problems with other human AA friends, they are the instruments to help me to have a little bit of wisdom to know the difference.

Thanks for letting me share. jc.toller@euronet.be - ICQ 36308407.


Member: DJ
Location: Ontario
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 11:14:57 AM

Comments

I'm an Alcoholic ... name is DJ Turn it over ... let go ....

My trouble is always trying to control people, places,and things .... I couldn't stay sober ... or get along with anyone. When I turned my ideas over to AA ideas ... my life started to change ... and when I was shown Step 3 ... I came to believe that God was a factor in my recovery .

When I am outta sorts or struggling ... I practice the simple tasks of asking for help in the morning and giving thanks at night ... I call it turning it over.

And when I stop controlling and start to participate ... my troubles seem to disappear .. and that is letting go ...

Happy Birthday to Patti W. RI a miricle and an example that AA is working for another that follows the path.

Welcome if you are new and keep Coming Back !!


Member: Chris
Location: Florida
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 3:10:38 PM

Comments

Hi everyone,Chris H. here, from Florida. I have had a hard time finding the new sight, since I don't know that much about Computers..Glad to be back! Boy..did I need to hear about turning it over!If I don't keep close to the program, I have a terrible time turniong it over. I always thought we were supposed to be in control. But,I never did a very good job when I was. There must be something I haven't turned over because I almost took a drink on Thanksgiving. I really needed a meeting.. I had forgotten how hard Holidays are..I didn't get to one, and I couldn't find this one. I did NOT take a drink, but I could have. I heard this little voice in me say ,"this is a special occasion. It will be alright." thank heavensI didn't drink, but I always feel so ashamed if I get that close. One thing I have learned..stay away from those wine glasses. Earlier this month, I was taking a glass full of champagne and toasting along with everyone else...not drinking, but toasting. I guess that just got me too close for comfort, and when the chamapgne was poured at THe Thanksgiving table, I almost had some. Hopefully, I have learned my lesson. I just feel scared because I still can't get to any meetings face to face. I feel ashamed of that too. You'd think that I was newly sober, but I was 6 years in Nov....Just not being to face to face meetings makes it really hard... I sure am glad to find you people. I just must remember that I am Alcoholic and always will be.. I'm always one drink away from a drunk.Thanks for listening..And for being here...Chris


Member: kathleen k.
Location: har,pa.
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 5:12:30 PM

Comments

help me, i am an alcoholic and it willsoon cost me my job and life. myhusband thinks that you caan just quit and that if he screams and belittles me enough i will stop. he had an alcoholic mother. i have been drinking for the last 4 years. because i drink it is very convenient for all the blame for everything to fall on me. please help me. kk


Member: Shannon S.
Location: California
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 6:41:55 PM

Comments

Hi everyone. My name is Shannon and I,m an alcoholic. For Kathleen K. I hope you can call your local central office of alcoholics anonymous. Please ask them to send someone to take you to ameeting. There is nothing like A.A. I believe anyone can recover. I have through the grace of a higher power. Turning it over is very important. I was told to say the Serenity Prayer a lot. It has really helped. Bless us all.


Member: Roy S.
Location:
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 8:10:58 PM

Comments

"Turning it over" was and is difficult for me on a regular basis. While it seems like it should be a relief to let certain things go, it just does not work out that way. However, I know that if I do not eventually turn it all over, I will end up back where I was before AA, and that is not an option to me. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Letty C
Location: Lebanon PA
Date: 12/2/99
Time: 9:17:47 PM

Comments

Hi Letty Alcoholic, Kathleen, I think you are not so far from my area. Here is my e-mail if you need to talk www.lettyc@dellnet.com..sorry about the double-post.


Member: Frank D
Location: Vancouver WA
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 12:04:55 AM

Comments

i'll be Frank with you i an a alcoholic. sure just turn it over. WoW, at first that sounded easy but back then everything sounded easy, yes i was doing it my way and by myself, yes i drank again. this time around has been way different, i use sponsors, the phone, the big book, my HP and have found that the abilty to share with other people in recouvery made it really start to work. i do step three the way it is writen, hearing made NOT MAKE. i am enjoying life now and if i have a problem with turning it over i ask for help and seem to find someone else has been their also. i go to step eleven and can feel it work all around me. WoW God sure knew what was up when he gave Bill W his job hu! well working with others is my ticket to turning it over when i can't let go and let god from with-in me. Thanks to all for being here & God bless us all!


Member: Tom A. 7/25/60
Location: Carlisle, AR
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 2:47:23 PM

Comments

Good Afternoon to Everyone participating in Staying Cyber's Discussion Meeting this week.

Thank you Alan for the topic!

My name is Tom A. a grateful sober alcoholic today by the grace of a wonderful Higher Power and the teachings of this marvelous fellowship we call A.A.

There have been my good suggestions this week and I am thankful for them. Early in my sobriety I was told to utilize this program and not analyze it. When I read your topic "How to turn it over." My thoughts went to Step 3 and it has been my experience that it is sometimes a moment by moment decision to turn my will and my life over the the God of my understanding, but I know a day does not go by when I make this decision and it has been working for me for a number of twenty-four hours. I carry a wallet card with me and when the going gets tough, I simply take it out and begin reading the Serenity Prayer, the Preamble, the Steps and the Traditions and I try to use those simple cliches/slogans/mottoes as often as I need them, but the bottom line for me is this any day that Tom A. doesen't take a drink is an example of how I turn it over.

Enjoy Your Sobriety Today!

God Bless - Tom A. ate@gte.net


Member: Aaron W.
Location: Somerset, NJ
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 3:40:14 PM

Comments

Hi family. My name is Aaron and an alcoholic. Alan thanks for the topic, turning it over. I have been sober a few 24's and it's still hard to turn it over, at times. Just remember you are not alone, this is a we program. You sholud have a Higher Power, Sponsor, and A Home Group, you have to use them all. If you are working on turning it over, your Higher Power is in charge, and will present you with opportunties to practice, and the more you practice the better you are going to get. Don't be too hard on yourself you are 2 years sober, you are probably just where you should be. You did'nt drink today, you are doing good, keep coming, it will get better. That's a promise. Thank you for sharing and thanks for letting me share.


Member: Helen K
Location: OH
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 3:58:41 PM

Comments

Hello Family, I'm Helen and I am an alcoholic. I really needed to read all of your thoughts today. I got so much out of it, and it's true, the new people remind me of where I've been, and the old timers give me hope of where I can go. Turning it over is the topic this week, thanks Alan. I learned earlier in my program that all the answers and solutions to our disease and our dilemna are "in the book". I believe that every word in the big book is important. Chapter 5 starts with a phrase that I sometimes have to mumble to myself over and over again to remind myself to get back on the program. "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path". It's in the book. Turning it over to me started when I joined the rooms of AA and decided to not just "do", but to "live" our 12-Step program. When I find myself in a back spin, it's usually because I am either living in the past or the future, not the present. When I find myself in a back spin, it's because I "find some person, place, or thing" unacceptable to me. When I'm in a back spin, I find that it's because I'm trying to control a person or situation, or that things aren't going my way. Many times, especially early in recovery, I would find that I would "turn things over", but more often than not, I snatched them back from my Higher Power. I have learned that I am my biggest problem. Not my family, not my job, not a person close to me who is still drinking or using, or any other situation I choose to blame. Me. I'm the problem. An oldtimer once shared with me that "it's not what happens to me, but how I handle what happens to me". Ain't that the truth? Our program of recovery demands rigorous honesty. We have to be honest with ourselves and our Higher Power. For example, I tried to get into a relationship early in recovery. I learned a blessed lesson. First, how can I love another person if I don't know what love means? Second, when we start cleaning our lives up, it can leave a void that if you don't fill it with this program, you will find something, or someone to fill up the emptiness and help you take the focus away from the most important person in recovery - you. This is a life and death program. We are at the end of the road. People die in AA and people die of alcoholism everyday, so we must never forget how absolutely important our Higher Power is. Alcohol is "cuning, baffling, and powerful", while you're playing at the fellowship, your disease is "doing pushups in the corner". Lynn C, I love you, thanks for bringing up a lack of trust, a big problem with me too. Sandy P read what Big John has to say. Glen R in nevada, accept your feelings because now you can feel. I too am sad (reliving the anniversary of the death of a little angel last year), someone once told me, "I complained that I had no shoes, then I saw a person who had no feet", we love you and we feel your pain. Chris from FL - I'm so absolutely proud of you. Thank God - you didn't drink today!!!!! I love you all - keep coming back.


Member: Jim C.
Location: Anaheim, Calif.
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 7:25:54 PM

Comments

Hi everyone, my name is Jim, and I am most certainly an alcoholic. I have been blessed to be in recovery for a considerable length of time, and I am grateful more and more as each day goes by.

I had shared earlier this week, but there is one other thing I would like to share with you. As I posted before, sometimes turning something over to God is difficult.

Most of my life, my memories of growing up with my father were not very good. We rarely spoke, and never did anything together. We shut each other off.

Recently, I found out that he is going to have open-heart surgery, and at 75, well who knows. He currently lives in another state, and I knew that if I didn't clean up my side of the street, and he should die, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

I wrote him a very sincere letter, and I wished him well. For the first time in years I told him that I loved him. Very difficult for me!!

I prayed about it, and turned the outcome over to God, knowing that my side of the street was clean. A couple of weeks ago, I recieved a card from him for by belly-button, and for the first time that I can remember, he said, "Son, I love you." Heavy duty stuff for me, but proof that turning the outcome of things over to God, and having faith that his will, will be done, and will indeed be the best thing for me.

I do not know what will happen from this day on, but I know that with the support of this AA family, I will continue to grow.

I did a little footwork, left the outcome up to God, and great things are coming to pass. Just like all of you said it would.

I have been experiencing these kind of miracles for the last 19 yrs. that I have been sober, and I am grateful for each and every day. I am living proof that turning things over to a power greater than myself works, as long as I don't try and manipulate the outcome.

It's a great life, and thanks to everyone for being a part of it. God bless you all!!!!


Member: kathleen k.
Location: pa.
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 7:50:24 PM

Comments

Hi, this is kathleenk. I am going to my first meeting with a friend in about 2 minutes. pleasepray for me, that i have the strength to do this. i am very frightened. thank you for listening and replying, kk kathleen k


Member: judy k
Location: loganville,ga
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 8:19:07 PM

Comments

my name is judy and i'm an alcoholic. on turning it over, i tell myself everyday that i'm gonna do that. i do the 1, 2 & 3 steps everyday. but for some reason i keep taking my will back. i try to do the next right thing but it doesn't seem to work. i've been in this program for over 15 years minus 2 days. i did have a slip. i thank GOD it was only for 2 days. sometimes i think i really have it together but then there are other days when i'm really confused and scared. i keep telling myself it is just "one day at a time". yesterday is gone, tomorrow isn't here yet. all we have is today. i know that the promises will come true if i work for them. i just really have to have total faith in my higher power. thank you for letting me share. this program has really changed my life.


Member: Alan
Location: West
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 9:00:26 PM

Comments

I was told once, that all I needed to do was put a dime in the phone and you all would be there. Well I put my dime in, and you were there. How much better I feel today after using so much of the advice you've given me. I can't express how much all of you and the program of AA means to me. You are the reason I keep coming back. To hear your strength,hope,and courage. We are all amazing people. I love you all, and thank you from the bottom of my heart. God bless!!!


Member: Steven H.
Location: NYC
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 9:52:33 PM

Comments

Hi I am Steven and I am still an alchoholic- I checked in earlier this week and I have to say that I am really touched by this cyber-meeting. Thanks Alan for the inspiring topic. For me turning it over is still taking a deep breath and letting go of my ego-control over the outcome of any situation- prayer. Understanding that my higher power, the "spirit of the universe" will carry me, as yours is carrying you, Kathleen, to the meeting. Congratulations! You really helped me today, with your actions in getting to a meeting. Just don't drink tonight and tommorrow when you get up figure out which meeting you can get to and it will be ok.This is like what has happened to many of us. We have been relieved of our misery. You don't have to drink anymore. Best of luck and stay in touch. Thanks to all the sharers!


Member: Doug K
Location: Hart, Mi
Date: 12/3/99
Time: 10:49:13 PM

Comments

Hi everybody, my name is Doug and I'm an alcoholic. Who the Hell do I think I am, anyway? Do I think people should be building an alter to me for the wonderful life I've lived? Does my phone ring when my HP is unsure what to do next? Do I even know what is good for Doug? My finest efforts consisted of ripping through peoples lives like a self-centered, self-righteous plague. When I get honest with myself, I know that I have not done well. That the many miracles and blessings in my life have not come from me, but from my Higher Power. Today I believe that everything is exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment, even if I don't understand why. The actual way I do this is to visualize myself in the direct presence of my HP. It also helped me in the beginning to look up in the dictionary "care of"( Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him.) One of the definitions in the dictionary we have at the A.A. hall defines "care of" as "affection of". Turn myself over to the love of my HP. And for that I'm so very gratefull.


Member: kathleen k
Location: pa
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 12:58:42 AM

Comments

Hi kathleen here. Havepatiently been awaiting the start of this day, just so i could talk for a minute. Went to my first meeting last night. When I got home there were several very supportive messages waiting...thank you all very much. Spoke at the meeting although I was very afraid. The support was overwhelming. It is nice not to feel like some monster. I know the road will be a life time's work,biut right now it is easier to think that I only have to not drink for this minute. I am going to sleep sober, for the second night in a row...will wonders never cease. Thank you and God bless. kk


Member: ValerieM
Location: London, England
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 7:22:02 AM

Comments

Hi, my name is Val and I'm an alcoholic. I have been around many years but a problem has been rearing its ugly head. I was even on my knees this morning at 4 am trying to pray for the person concerned! (My daughter's husband). The answer came by reading your letters about turning it over (surprise, surprise!). The serenity prayer. Why didn't I think of that! It seems to be working. It's not my problem and there's not a lot I can do about it. But I can be there for her when she sees the light - and that's because I am sober. Thank you all for keeping me sober for many years. Good Bless.


Member: Mike M
Location: Kosovo
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 4:54:13 PM

Comments

Hi, My name is Mike and I'm an alcoholic. I am currently in Kosovo and have not had a drink sinces Thanksgiving. It's tough with all the troubles over here. This is the closest I've been to a AA meeting as I don't think they have them over here.


Member: kathyk
Location: pa
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 7:22:09 PM

Comments

Mike in Kosovo Check into the coffeepot here kathyk


Member: Susan H
Location: Atlanta
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 8:13:25 PM

Comments

Hi my name is Susan and I AM an alcoholic! Turning it over is a great topic. I have been fighting AA and this disease for 3 years. The most sobriety I have had in my life is 8 1/2 months. I currently have 41 days. A strange thing happened to me about two weeks ago. I was having a really bad day, called my sponser and she said to go to the first meeting I could find. Since I am in Atlanta there is always a meeting, so I went to a womens only meeting. During this meeting, a sense of serenity and peace came over me and has not left me yet. I truely believe the only way I am going to stay sober is with my higer power whom I choose to call God and AA. I heard an interesting analogy the other day at a meeting and thought I would share it. If you were in a room of terminaly ill cancer patients and told them that all they had to do was go to a meeting one hour per day and turn their lives over to a higher power and they would live, they would all kiss your feet and run out of the room to a meeting. Our insanity is that is all we have to do to stay alive.

To Kathlen, my brother feels the same way. He says it just takes will power. Well I have begun to educate him with books, Alanon and taking him to meetings with me. He is slowly changing his opinion. Get a good sponser. One who will walk you through the steps and can help you. I don't know how much you drank but you might want to consider a treatment center. The DT's can be awful. Typically your job, if it is a large company, will look up to you for getting help. Hope this helps.

One last bit of wisdom.

IF YOU DO WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS DONE YOU WILL BE WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN.

P.S. Sorry to be so lengthy but I have been sick all week and unable to attend a meeting so I really needed to talk. Thanks for being there for me.


Member: Patrick
Location: Knoxville,Tn.
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 8:14:06 PM

Comments

Patrick W. MY first time at an internet AA meeting. I've enjoyed reading the comments this week. It really is true that anywhere you go the AA meesage is the same. It does my heart good to hear from so many serious recoverying folks. The AA meetings in this area lack the spark that I found in hanging aournd some real oldtimers my first years in the program. so thank God I am getting nourished with the enthusiasm of grateful saved lives. About the topic. as awarness of God has increased in my life. it appears that the amount of time spent thinking of God has increased. As this real miracle occurs the right choice becomes easier to make the struggle internally diminishes. when this happens the right decsion is made concering the difficulties of this Purely Human affair. Serenity and peace have been bestowed upon my rattle torn nerves. Each occurence of emotional disturbance that is overcome with serentiy as a reult of being concious of God Only serves to strenghten my faith and it comes quicker the next time until old character defects are met with immediate intervention by the constant consious contact with God. Courage to go with the decision that is right is directly preportional to faith I have achieved from past reliances on God. The more I use it The stronger it gets until it never leaves. That is the promise come true of peace and serenity. Thanks for lettin me get my thoughts out. love ya a lot!


Member: Casey G.
Location: North Dakota
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 9:01:17 PM

Comments

This is my first time on an internet A.A. meeting. I have been sober and drug free for over a month now and it feels pretty good. The thing that has helped me stay sober is going to treatment classes and meeting with other alcoholics like myself. Without the support of the others in my group I don't think I would be able to stay sober. To everyone out there I know what you are feeling and you just have to take it one day at a time. I know that that is the only way to stay sober. Sober in North Dakota.


Member: TOM
Location: OMAHA
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 11:31:01 PM

Comments

HI, I'M TOM AND I'M AN ALCOHOLIC, GOOD TOPIC, I KEEP TAKING THINGS BACK BUT KEEP DOING THE STEPS THE FIRST 3 STEPS DAILY AND 11 OF COURSE AND THINGS KEEP GETTING BETTER. THIS HELPS ME WHEN MY PROBLEM BESIDES ME IS A PERSON. SOMEBODY ONCE TOLD ME TO PRAY FOR THEM. I TRIED AND DIDN'T DO SO WELL. SO THEY SAID AT FIRST JUST TO ASK GOD TO GIVE THEM WHAT THEY DESERVED. I DID AND IT HELPED. THE OTHER THING THAT HELPS ME LET GO IS TO GET INTO SOME KIND OF ACTION. CALL SOMEBODY MOW, CLEAN, ETC-DO SOMETHING NOT DWELL ON THE BS I'VE CREATED AND WILL PONDER IF I DON'T DO SOMETHING. GOD TOOK THE OBSESSION WHEN I WAS WILLING TO GIVE IT UP. MY HIGHER POWER WILL TAKE ANYTHING I WILL GIVE UP. THANKS FOR BEING HERE.


Member: Dave D
Location: New Brunswick, CA
Date: 12/4/99
Time: 11:53:21 PM

Comments

hi guys. Sure is great to be sober. This is my first time on line at an AA meeting. I'm clean and sober for 4 years but I guess that doesent really matter because all we have is today. Turning it over is hard to do at the best of times. I guess it's because the HP is so powerfull that i'm awstruck. It's just beyond the relm of possibality. Now that I'm sober I' learned to respect the HP. Prayer is good for my false pride. It breads humility. Heres one i read alot. I am the Lord your God. Today I will be handeling all your problems today. No I don't need your help. If the devil happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do not attempt to solve it. Put it in the "domething for GOD to do" box. It will be adressed to GOD and I'm not to touch it. because I do not need to slumber nor do I rest, there is no need for you to loose sleep my child. If you need me I'm only a prayer away. thanks guys. God love and God Bless Keep clean and sober.