Member: Gabrielle P
Location: Northwest Ohio
Remote Name: 64.12.96.233
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 09:06 AM -0500

Comments

Gabrielle gratefull recovering alocholic....When I first got sober I was in a mental insttitute and it took a long time (6mos) to get me to the Alsohol Rehab unit...then they kept telling me what "lengths" I was going to have to go through to stay sober...like not associating with former friends, not going to bars,staying with the winners at the meetings, getting a sponsor,...I still today have had to choose my sobriety over family and friends sometimes...my son actively uses and drinks and becomes violent...I had to move away from him, it hurts but but it was what I had to do for my sobriety.....he is still unemployed adn using and still trying to blame me....what lengths are you willing to go to maintain your sobriety and not compromise your relationship with with God or your Higher Power..... I cannot fail until I stop trying, In Sobriety, In AA, In Life Gabrielle


Member: PappyPaw
Location: Sourt Central Mi
Remote Name: 66.231.37.50
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 10:27 AM -0500

Comments

PappyPaw Here, I too am a grateful recovering alcoholic, Hi everybody. What length will I go to to free myself from the clutches of this dreaded disease called alcoholism? That is the most unanswered subject in our "Self will-run riot" dilemma. An Easy Softer Way is the most sought after path and it never leads to success. Total honesty under the guidence of God is the only hope for me. "Tough Love" is a very tough but necessary choice we need to make and use to free us from and move us to needed objectives. The path back is narrow, arduous and full dangerous pit falls, but it has light at the end of the tunnel and it is filled with love and warm rewards not the cold heart tearing grief sorrow and termoil of going on down in the wrong direction. I to think "thourghly following there path" is a great plan Gabrielle. If I can just remember that my "Today's Soberiety" is a "Now Project", That when I am all alone I am in bad company and then step under the warm protection of "His umbrella" then I am in great shape for Today. Thank you for a wonderful topic. PappyPaw


Member: Les
Location: San Diego
Remote Name: 198.81.26.103
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 11:15 AM -0500

Comments

Gabrielle, what a great topic. Thank you, so very much. One evening, during a semi-blackout, I experienced a moment of clarity, and realized that my exceedingly sorry state of being was due to alcohol. I vowed then and there to stop drinking. Imagine my surprise when I found I could not stop, in fact, I could not even moderate my drinking. Each morning I would arise and decide that I just needed one drink to get started which, of course, led to another drink. I would make a vow to myself, each evening, that the next day would be different and the next day invariably turned out exactly like the day before. I had a very strong and honest desire to quite drinking but could not. Finally, I was directed to AA and eventually got to a Meeting sober. I would at that time and still, to this very day, do whatever is necessary to avoid that first drink. Fortunately, sobriety did not require that I sew my mouth shut or take up residence in a locked cage. What I had to do was: go to Meetings; read the book, Alcoholics Anonymous; get a sponsor to help me understand the directions in the Big Book and apply them; stop hanging around with unsavory people in slippery situations; and search for a profound religious or spiritual experience that would relieve me from the obsession with drinking alcohol -- all on a daily basis. My sobriety must come first because without it my life would return to the horror it had become prior to my membership in AA and I love my life today.


Member: Rebecca S
Location: W
Remote Name: 65.33.44.186
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 11:25 AM -0500

Comments

Rebecca here, alcoholic. Thank you for the topic Gabrielle. (prayers for you too). ANY LENGTHS...I have to remind myself daily of that single statement. It helps at times to keep myself in check. And puts it into prospective. When I start aquirirng a "martyr" attitude, that statement will center me, or at least get me back to the ball park. I am still very new to this wonderful program. I will indeed go to any lengths to stay sober. The path back IS narrow...(well said). I know I want to stay on this one, God willing, ODAAT...Thank you for this topic on a Sunday. What a great way to start my week......Peace ----Rebecca


Member: Rarely
Location: rontherocket@hotmail.com
Remote Name: 207.161.34.241
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 12:19 PM -0500

Comments

Well first off I must say I never went to a treatment center.... I find that those who got their first few days of sobriety in a treatment center have some ideas that are much different than mine. For example those who went to treatment and now go on a twelve step call have a tendancy to offer the new person a treatment program. When I go on a twelve step call I am willing to show the new commer precisely how we have recovered. I would also like to add (tongue in cheek) That I have never lost a twelve step call to a goverment funded treatment center. I believe that when someone asks for A.A. help it should be given. If they ask for a three week program I point them in that direction. I must add that I have worked for five years in the alcohol treatment unit of the largest hospital in our city some twenty odd years ago. So I end by saying." what ever works for you is all that really matters just as long as we get there." I think that the topic is a good one and hope my view dosen't take away from it. The point I wish to make is what they say in treatment is not neccessarily what a sponsor in A.A. might say.


Member: Kim M.
Location: FL
Remote Name: 66.32.130.32
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 02:19 PM -0500

Comments

I learned about willing to go to any lengths at rehab too. Each year I change something knowingly to make sure I go to any lengths. Not only extending the tough love on myself ( for all the shame, guilt, bridges I burned and so on) but for family and friends is very hard. It is either me or them. I picked me a long time ago and let go of the family and friends. I learned also that the only power I have is the one my higher power gives to me and I can not control what goes on in my children's lives. Even though at the time I left, my family knew that I was a sick individual and now has now witnessed me sober they have accepted me back into their lives. I talk and walk a lot of the program to them, just planting that mustard seed. By my higher power's grace I can always walk in the other direction or hang up the phone when the blame sarts. I try to live guilt free, take things to God in prayer and never think that a drink will heal my woes and make me more willing. I will go to ANY lengths to keep what I have and in the future will have accomplish.


Member: AZbill
Location: azbill1172@cox.net
Remote Name: 68.226.19.154
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 03:13 PM -0500

Comments

Hi. Bill here. Alcoholic from Arizona. "...willing to go to any length" is preceded by the phrase. "If you have decided you want what we have..." In this case we=AA. There are many many pathways to recovery. Most work very well so long as one stays within the parameters of that particular program. Mixing different programs can be somewhat confusing to an already confused newcomer. I personally came into AA not thinking it would work. So my "any lengths" became the AA way. My motives were a bit iffy, but I decided to work the program precisely the way it was explained in the big book. I did it to prove that it would not work for me. :) I worked the entire program and not just 1/3 of it. I studied and worked the 12 Steps, the 12 Traditions, and the 12 Concepts of service. I am experiencing a wonderful dichotomy of recovery. My daughter got sober in the church. She went on to become a missionary in the Figi Islands. I got sober in AA went on to carry the AA message to suffering alcoholics. We each have our own "any lengths". And both of us respect and honor each others recovery. Thank you very much. I love you. Bill


Member: THOMAS A
Location: SPOKANE, WA
Remote Name: 66.189.209.70
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 05:26 PM -0500

Comments

Hello Thomas alcoholic great topic " go to any lenght" to me going to the any length is what I have the willingness to do to keep the ones that I care about so most of all in my life, my wife, kids, and the rest of my family. God was the one that has given me the direction, and the strenght, and my willingness to do what is right for myself and all that are around me.


Member: leon
Location: New Jersey
Remote Name: 68.84.77.211
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 06:25 PM -0500

Comments

Hi,my name is leon and I am a Alcohic going to meetings and believing in a higher power will give you the will power to stay sober.I am sick tonight and could not attend a meeting So I came on the site to stay in touch


Member: Les
Location: San Diego
Remote Name: 198.81.26.103
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 07:13 PM -0500

Comments

i suspect I am losing my mind, but waht the hell. It has been my experience that to live "happy, joyous, and free" all I need do is practice the Principles of AA, as best I can, in all my affairs. When I do this everything just seems to work out. I learned the Principles of AA by taking the Steps of AA. I took the Steps of AA following the directions in the book, Alcoholics Anonymous, with the help of an AA member who had gone before me. I love AA and what it has done for me and pray that anyone that wants to change their life for the better will have as good a luck with the Program as I have had. Perhaps we could discuss the principles of AA and their use in our lives.


Member: Les
Location: San Diego
Remote Name: 198.81.26.103
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 07:18 PM -0500

Comments

One second ago I came on this site and there were no postings. Clicking the refresh button changed nothing -- So I submitted a share thinking that, perhaps I did not read the proper date on the heading earlier today -- well you see what thinking gets me. It is strange, so strange.


Member: Adam H.
Location: New York, NY
Remote Name: 64.232.156.194
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 08:50 PM -0500

Comments

Adam, alcoholic. My God, I don't think I've ever been asked that question point blank... thank you Gabrielle! I think the responsibility statement says it for me very nicely: "When ANYONE, ANYWHERE reaches out for help, let it begin with me." I've moved around a lot in sobriety, and even had the opportunity to love sober in a country where I drank daily. Naturally, getting AA meetings was a must if I was going to stay sober, but none of the meetings were in English, the largest turnout was about 8 people, and I was one of the few people in that group of 8 who had worked all the steps. It's really hard in those circumstances to show up at that meeting and say, "Whatcha got for ME?" I had an opportunity to give back to AA big time while I was there and it meant carrying the message into psych wards, dealing with a LOT of wet drunks (most of whom were not very receptive to AA), and sharing my E/S/H from podiums IN JAPANESE. And NON of those thingns are very easy for me to do, but I did all those things simply because I owe AA a huge debt of gratitude. My life has been rescued by the principles and actions of AA, and doing those things for anyone, anywhere in the hope that maybe I can help some drunk getout of bed and walk through the archway to freedom is the least I can do. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Adam H.
Location: New York, NY
Remote Name: 64.232.156.194
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 09:02 PM -0500

Comments

Adam again...sorry for the double-dip, but I just re-read my last post... Looks like I said I have had the chance to "love sober in a country where I used to drink every day." I meant to type "LIVE sober." Well, just clearing that up... And incidentally, I have gotten to love others in soberiety, and sometimes that too is going to any lengths. NUF SED.


Member: Adam H.
Location: New York, NY
Remote Name: 64.232.156.194
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 09:02 PM -0500

Comments

Adam again...sorry for the double-dip, but I just re-read my last post... Looks like I said I have had the chance to "love sober in a country where I used to drink every day." I meant to type "LIVE sober." Well, just clearing that up... And incidentally, I have gotten to love others in soberiety, and sometimes that too is going to any lengths. NUF SED.


Member: dave.s
Location: driffield e.yorks
Remote Name: 80.225.182.5
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 11:07 PM -0500

Comments

Goofy here oops sorry Dave S My brain is Goofy I think I know that.Any lenghts?In recovery dangers lurk everywhere Its a natural instinct for the alcoholic to take the easy option.Avoid the excuses do what you dont like doing!And if asked visit a still suffering friend,not to pity or gloat but to ty and help and remind yourself where you came from!


Member: Annie M
Location: Bloomsburg, PA
Remote Name: 208.32.94.40
Date: 25 Jan 2004
Time: 11:48 PM -0500

Comments

Annie, Alcoholic here. Thank you for the topic Gabrielle. It was exactly what I needed to think and read about. My 17th anniversary is this week and I was just reminded how sick I still am, by my response to an e-mail from my brother. Very few people have the ability to push my buttons anymore...It has been suggested to me many times over the years that I might try Alanon. It was the one suggestion I've poo- poo'd over the years. For one, because I lived 3,000 miles away from my family for 14 years. It seems now, that going to any lengths for me is going to be going to alanon. If there's one emotion that the most threatening to me and my sobriety, it is anger. I had forgotten how unsettling it was to feel as I did when I read that e-mail. My inability to deal with my alcoholic brother in a healthy way will hurt the peace I've been given in AA and ultimately my sobriety. I forgot for a moment to think of him as a sick, suffering alcoholic. And I will have to make amends, and I really hate that :) Thanks for letting me share and thank you all for sharing.


Member: Nate W.
Location: Spokane, WA
Remote Name: 24.18.115.53
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 02:37 AM -0500

Comments

Hey its Nate, this month marks 2 years from when my alcoholism went to the worse. These past couple of days I have been thinking about the changes I have made and how much happier I am now, but only one day comes at a time for myself. The change was one of the hardest things to do in my life, physically and emotionally, but I feel it has paid off well.


Member: Charlie Darling
Location: Key West FL
Remote Name: 66.156.211.254
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 06:53 AM -0500

Comments

Hi Family Charlie Darling a very GRATEFUL Recovering Alcholic. Going to any lengths, and I will go as far as it takes, for my sobriety is more important than anything. Who knew almost 7 yrs ago that I would feel like this, for all I thought of was to have that drink, and I did anything to get it, and today I do anything to keep my sobriety. I go to meetings daily, talk to my sponsor who has helped me to no end. I do service work, and work with new comers. I also have a job where we are all in sobrity which is great for it is like being at a meeting all day. I will keep coming back for life has gotten better more than my wildest dreams. Today I seem to handel things as they come up alot better than when I drank. Peace and Love Charlie Darling kwduke_1999@yahoo.com Thank you so much for the topic. God Bless you ALL


Member: Mike H
Location: Jackson Michigan
Remote Name: 68.76.56.44
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 08:29 AM -0500

Comments

I have tried for many years to stay sober. My biggest downfall has been not willing to go to any lengths. Knew I needed meetings but did not go. Needed a sponsor but did not seek one out. Doing the steps by yourself is easy, but do not always work. It takes the combined effort of myself, my Higher Power, the program of AA, a sponsor to help during rough spots, good friends that will let you know when something isn't right. To me that is being willing to go to any lengths and the path that I am trying to follow. It takes what it takes to get us to this point and I believe I have arrived. Health and happiness to us all. Mike H.


Member: Craig L (Dogmanor@yahoo.com)
Location: Aloha, Oregon
Remote Name: 65.102.43.100
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 10:15 AM -0500

Comments

Craig L another “real alcoholic” (page 21). My first sponsor scheduled me to meet with him once a week to study the Big Book and learn the practice of the 12 steps. At our first meeting he asked if I was willing to go to any lengths? At that time I didn’t know the answer. I was always a “half measures” kind of guy. I felt like I had fumbled my way through life and sometimes I got results in spite of myself. I did know I was terrified of what alcohol had done to me and I did not want to drink anymore. Over the months, we covered the steps and nothing that was asked of me was too difficult. My life got better, but it was when I relapsed that I realized what I had lost. When I got out of detox, I had no doubt about my willingness any more. As I started working with others I thought I could make others get sobriety. Over the years I realized I am also powerless over your alcoholism as well as my own. Today, I practice being available and letting go. AA has brought me a Peace in life I could not have imagined while I drank and I know that same Peace is available to anyone willing to do the work.


Member: Marv L
Location: Ms.
Remote Name: 209.240.205.61
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 03:37 PM -0500

Comments

Hi,Im Marv,alcoholic,sober today by the care of my HIgher Power, the AA twelve steps,AND your fellowship,THANKS for all the good thoughts on "Going to any lengths"!Gabrielle,your share is SO REAL, we all have faced family crises that are heart-breaking,I"m so glad our sobriety is our number one priority; I was so ashamed of my past it took years to deal with it by doing the steps,and it took TIME for the hurts to heal,I watched my teenagers Id disappointed so much by my alcoholism turn into young adults who now lead full lives on their own,and looking back,only a Higher Power couldve gotten us from where we were to where we are!! Just keep trudging,the promises DO come true!!Thank God for a fellowship that understands the disease of alcoholism--and thanks to all of you for helping me by your shares !!Hey, I "wanted what you had" and today,Im still willing to do my best at working the program of recovery,love you all !!


Member: Nate W.
Location: Spokane, WA
Remote Name: 24.18.115.53
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 04:47 PM -0500

Comments

Nate here, I am an alcoholic, but the topic hit the spot with family issues as well as the start of the recovery process for myself. It was very difficult with the stress of not drinking but the problems around me became more visible, I was having problems and didn't seek A.A. and was miserable. Now I am doing much better with the help and thoughts of the A.A. people and meetings.


Member: Peggy E
Location: Salem, Oregon
Remote Name: 67.164.52.213
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 07:25 PM -0500

Comments

Hi! I'm Peggy. I'm an alcoholic. Thanks, Gabrielle for the topic. The book says "...If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it - then you are ready to take certain steps." Before I got into the steps with my sponsor we discussed how willing I was to give myself to the AA program. If you drank every day you go to a meeting every day. Get a "home group" you will commit to. You don't keep alcohol or drugs in your home. You don't go where it is slippery. (If you sit in a barber shop long enough you wiiiiiiiiilllllllll get a hair cut!) Get in the habit of calling the sponsor or someone else in AA on the phone. In the beginning I lived and breathed AA. I didn't have to give up old drinking friends because I didn't have any friends left! I jumped into the program with both feet - reached out to others in early recovery (if I had one more day than someone else had I had something to give, my sponsor said.). That was 26 years ago - one day at a time. Happy 17 years Annie! Thanks for the great topic, Gabrielle!


Member: vanessa L.
Location: va
Remote Name: 65.165.88.1
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 08:09 PM -0500

Comments

Hi everyone, I'm Vanessa and I'm an alcholic. I'm a re-tread in the program and have learned the hard way that I have to go to any lengths if I want to stay sober. Years ago when I first joined AA I did everything half ass (as my friend says, quarter ass!) Ofcourse it didn't take long before the cunning and baffling disease took a firm hold of me. The disease is certainly progressive and my loneliness and isolation became unbearable, my thinking, quick temper and anxiety levels worse and worse. I resented AA and thought of it as a drag and punishement. How times have changed as I now see the fellowship as a gift, I find it fun and I am eternally grateful for the members who are out there to help other alcoholics like me stay sober and find peace and serenity. The best way for me to go to any lengths is to take the advice of the people who have been successful at staying sober, not try to do it my way which never worked and to pray,go to meetings, read and hardest of all to not pick up the first drink and keep it simple. Thanks for the topic Gabrielle, and I remind us all of any hell we might be going through - This too shall pass.


Member: FrankD
Location: NJ
Remote Name: 68.45.198.144
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 08:35 PM -0500

Comments

Hi, Frank here, alcoholic. Great topic Gabby. The first part of going to any lengths, for me, was showing up at my first AA meeting at all. I was afraid and ashamed that others would know I had a problem that I couldn't handle myself, was unsure what to expect, was afraid that they couldn't help me, because I must be different. The second part was saying goodbye to my best friend, and propably the only friend I had left. My friend was a liar, a cheat, and was making me thouroughly miserable, but I could not picture my life without my best friend alcohol. I didn't know how. Yet I listened to suggestions from others who had said goodbye and learned how to make new friends. Going to any lengths keeps me coming back because I know I have much further to go, now that I can. Frank


Member: jamel
Location: VA
Remote Name: 68.49.119.81
Date: 26 Jan 2004
Time: 11:11 PM -0500

Comments

Day 7 Sober, Just wanted to Share. I will keep coming back. An Alcoholic & Addict name jame.


Member: Kim T.
Location: Nevada
Remote Name: 63.151.179.135
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 01:19 AM -0500

Comments

Hi, my name is Kim and I am an alcoholic. Wow, what a great topic,Gabrielle. I too,was asked by my first sponsor if I was willing to go to any length to stay sober.My answer was simple--yes.I knew I wanted what you had and I was definately willing to go to any length to stay sober.My kids were young when I first got sober and when I had to go to "another one of those meetings" they would get angry.Then I reached a place in my sobriety when my kids would say "mom,I think you need a meeting".The book tells us this is a family disease, so I was able to introduce my kids to alateen and alatot which helped them tremendously early on. In this last year I have been blessed with a grandchild and my oldest has found his way into the doors of AA,for that I am so grateful. Life can be overwhelming,but I can walk thru anything so long as I don't drink.Today I have a sponsor,I sponsor others,I stay in service, and go to meetings.My homegroup is a women's step study.It is still so important to me to go to any lengths,so with that--I'll keep comin' back.


Member: GigiJ
Location: chicago
Remote Name: 24.12.172.238
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 01:25 AM -0500

Comments

hi gigi member of A.A. going to any length is a good topic. Today i have devoted my life to helping others stay sober i provide transistional housing for recovering women and it never fails i always get my face/feelings hurt. I am really starting to isolate because im getting very discouraged. I devoted my life to the A.A. movement and the lengths i went to to achieve 4 years of soberity now i am beggining to question my own program and my H.P. is this what i got sober for is this my primary purpose .PLEASE I NEED HELP drunk/drugie in dispair.


Member: GigiJ
Location: chicago
Remote Name: 24.12.172.238
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 01:28 AM -0500

Comments


Member: Kathy K.
Location: Northeast
Remote Name: 64.12.96.233
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 06:40 AM -0500

Comments

GIGI - I note you say you have devoted your life to helping other women in recovery. Could it be you have given too much of yourself away? I have to be careful of that. Also I have had to lower (eliminate,if possible) my expections of others. Do you have a sponsor? I have had to find balance in my program by not concentrating too much of any one thing - just working the entire program to the best of my ability. ERIC- Good to read your post. Hope you're feeling better now. Through with treatments? Sure are having some cold - cold weather here in MA. Snow due tomorrow - maybe it will warm up a bit. Hope so - am retired with respitory problems - like to get out every day, but not happening this winter. Hard not to get cabin fever - thank God for this site. Love to all - Kathy K. -Northeast


Member: Ruby S.
Location: Baltimore
Remote Name: 68.85.213.181
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 11:03 AM -0500

Comments

Ruby S., Alcoholic and Addict. Going to any lengths is an excellent topic. I have been going to AA regularly since 1997 but have not been able to put together a year of continuous sobriety. Each time I hit a new bottom and return to AA, I feel that I am willing to go to any lengths. I take the suggestions, such as get a sponsor, attend meetings every day and work the Steps, but I eventually pick up that first drink. Today is my first day sober after a 4 day binge. What will I do differently this time? How can I ensure myself that I am not using half measures in my recovery? I don't know the answer to these things. When I woke up this morning, with the resolve to stay sober, I got on my knees and prayed to God to help keep me sober today and to be the best person that I can be. I don't know who or what I was praying to. My faith in a higher power is not strong after so many relapses. However, I must believe there is a higher power. I know that during my sober times I am aware that I am not keeping myself sober, that I am receiving help from something bigger than me. I always forget the pain that relapse causes. I am shaky right now and not drinking today won't be easy. But I am determined. I am going to pray for the willingness to go to any lengths to protect my sobriety.


Member: dave jr
Location: ohio
Remote Name: 199.35.113.35
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 01:09 PM -0500

Comments

hi i am dave, and i am having a good recovery so far it has been 6 months. on the topic i have went to any lengths to stay sober. i got out of the halfway house about 3 months ago and the second day i was out i ran into some old friends at the store. i had to say hi and politely leave the store. i knew right there that i could not hang around my old so called friends. i have met new friends that i talk to & go to meetings with that help me stay sober. it is a hard road to go down but i am doing it one mile at a time. bye for now , dave


Member: james k
Location: penticton b.c. canada
Remote Name: 24.67.253.204
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 03:46 PM -0500

Comments

Hi everyone,Jim K.here,Great topic "Going to any lengths".I had to make a lot of changes around me.The most difficult changes are from within me!I am continuosly reaching out to other members for help."Any lengths",for me is meetings,meetings , meetings and more meetings.My sobriety comes first in my recovery!! Thanks for allowing me to share.


Member: Rarely
Location: rontherocket@hotmail.com
Remote Name: 207.161.35.181
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 05:10 PM -0500

Comments

Meeting... meetings... and more meetings???? Don't you know what will happen to you if you go to too many meetings.......YOU STAY SOBER GET HAPPY. JOYOUS. AND FREE.


Member: Barb Mc
Location: PA
Remote Name: 68.162.127.94
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 09:53 PM -0500

Comments

Hi,Barbara, Alcoholic. What lengths have I gone to and am I willing to go to to keep this wonderful gift given to me? Just about anything. Some of the first things I did when I came in was give up friends of 30 years. And that meant giveing up my extended family. Then I had to CHANGE! That was hard because I was perfect. It was everybody else that was wrong. But change I did with the help of a great sponsor. Then I had to do the STEPS. I had a sponsor that refused to let me say I was working the steps. I had to incorporate all 12 steps into my daily life. I have to practice these principals on a daily basis. I can still hear one of my sponsors say loud and clear, "If you don't do a fourth step you won't stay sober." The fourth wasn't very bad but that fifth step is a killer. I could write down all my resentments, faults, failures and what made me angry and what made an excuse for me picking up a drink because it was just me and the paper. Having someone else read what I had written and know what I was all about was pure terror. I had gotten to the point where I wanted what others in the rooms had so I did as I was told. Me who figured if only everyone did as I told them the world would be a better place. I followed directions. I got involved in service work. I made meetings and meetings and more meetings. I sponsor others and am willing to listen to anyone when they want to talk. I finally gave my life up to the care of my God. And one day at a time I have stayed sober. This month I celebrated 15 years in the program and there are still times when I feel as if I just walked in the door. That tells me that I'm still teachable. As long as I keep an open mind, keep learning, keep going to meetings and stay in touch with other alcoholics,I will probably stay sober. I was given a beautiful gift by my God and I'm not going to give it back. It means more to me than anything else in the world. And I tell Him that every day. Thanks for being here.


Member: Ernie R.
Location: Goodwell, OK
Remote Name: 208.136.228.140
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 11:52 PM -0500

Comments

I'm Ernie and I am an alcoholic. To Adam--keep coming back--it gets better:) The posting from Gigi really hit home for me, as a member who is also in a helping profession. About seven years ago, I was working in a treatment center, and it had been about a year since I had been to a meeting. Why, you ask? Because I allowed myself to believe that, since I was a "helper", I didn't need anybody's help myself. What a bunch of B.S. I was in Amarillo, TX, during what proved to be my mother's final illness, alone in my motel room, when I got one of those GET DOWN AND WRESTLE WITH IT URGES TO DRINK!! I was scared to death, and I drove through a blizzard to get to a meeting. I stayed sober, by the grace of God only. BTW, I was 15 years sober at the time, and it taught me that, no matter what is going on, I have to remember that I am only one drink from death, and I have to invite God and the other people he uses into my life. I can't help anyone if I'm drunk or dead. This alcoholic does not go more than seven days without a meeting, even though my sobriety date is 10/27/82. I have to remember that my sobriety came only when I surrendered, and that only God can keep me sober and render me useful to my fellow drunks. Love you all.


Member: maryl t
Location: california
Remote Name: 209.165.44.170
Date: 27 Jan 2004
Time: 11:59 PM -0500

Comments

Thank you for this wonderful topic...What lenght will i go to to kkep my sobriety? What ever it takes because the horror of drinking is still very much alive in my mind. I was dead...spiritually dead. I had not felt that way before...such a sick, sick feeling. I cared for nothing...no one...just alcohol, and truth be known i hated the alcohol too. But i am sober now...joyously sober...gratefully sober thnaks to God who never gave up on me and to AA...which taught me the 12 steps back to God. The greatest lenght I went to was turning my will and my life over to God...but at the same time it was a huge relief because I was so very tired...tired of being in control (at least I thought I was, now i know I was just fooling myself) Now God directs and i just follow His directions. How simple and peaceful!!!! For the first time I can remeber i am truely at peace and there is a quite joy in my heart. Thank you for sharing and for listening. ( excuse any mis spelled words..I am very tired and can't think too straight....


Member: cec r h
Location: Stampede City
Remote Name: 192.41.148.220
Date: 28 Jan 2004
Time: 02:29 AM -0500

Comments

Hi all Cec H alkie here. Good one Gabby, The length I have gone to get and stay sober. Have been long and hard. Walked away from my first wife and two daughters, because if I stayed, I would have been drunk and in jail.Left the street-life and razsell-dazsell and learnt how to be a straight john ,9 to 5're ,and take pride in it. Stuck with the old timers that were happy, joyous and free and would teach me The How. Learnt how to be me and not apologize for being me. And meetings lots and lots of those. Another 24 to go please and have one for yourself.


Member: Kathleen
Location: Florida
Remote Name: 209.208.79.187
Date: 28 Jan 2004
Time: 04:05 AM -0500

Comments

Hi everyone, Kathleen here alcoholic, Thanks Gabrielle for a great topic. Whenever I hear of "going to any lengths to stay sober" I think of the lengths I went to to get booze. I remember taking my baby on my sons small bike with rolled up pennies in the rain a mile or more each way to get a six pack. I would do almost anything to get a drink and ended up living on the streets selling plasma to get starting money. I was very willing when I finally decided I wanted to stay sober more than I wanted to get drunk to do the things necessary to stay sober, meetings, sponser, steps, trying to help other alkies... Thanks for the topic... Kathleen


Member: Kelly M
Location: NH
Remote Name: 64.223.181.167
Date: 28 Jan 2004
Time: 11:10 AM -0500

Comments

Hi ((All)), Kelly here, an alcoholic in recovery. Going to any lengths to stay sober is a great topic, Thanks Gabriella. I would like to think I do go to any lengths today and that I am as serious as a heart attack about my sobriety. Why? I cheated death and I KNOW IT! I think it is really hard to stay sober until we wake up and realize we have hit bottom. I did wake up one morning like I did so many others at the "hung over Hilton". This one morning was different though... My mind was screaming... I had enough and for God to help me and I WAS WILLING, heart and soul to CHANGE EVERYHING about me to do that. Total and absolute surrender! from my core being... In surrendering on all levels I was willing to follow the program of AA as it is laid out, not (MY) way and give it a chance to work. Going to any lengths means taking (every) suggestion and doing even more then suggested for my recovery. It is either do or die for me. I do! It worked! AA is a way of life for me and I am changing everything about me which is a good thing really. I needed to change. My ways were screwed! Lastly, "My feelings don't matter, my thoughts don't matter, What (I do) is what matters". GodBless us all, Kelly :)


Member: Kelly M
Location: NH
Remote Name: 64.223.181.167
Date: 28 Jan 2004
Time: 11:25 AM -0500

Comments

Hi, This is a great tool that explains the change I was trying to explain... read and enjoy!!! Kelly:) http://www.barefootsworld.net/it.html


Member: Kimberley
Location: seattle
Remote Name: 198.81.26.103
Date: 28 Jan 2004
Time: 10:35 PM -0500

Comments

Hi kimberley recovering alcholic. I love your topic, i went to any lenghts to keep my sobriety, by hanging out with clean and sober people, leaving bad marriage, and people who steal my joy and by using steps, etc. i left port ore 13 years ago under police escort with nothing to escape domestic violence, and to achiev sobriety, keep coming back it does work pray pray and pray, watch out for people pleasing because it too is cunning powerful and baffling.


Member: Dr. Bob
Location: NJ
Remote Name: 68.46.84.26
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 02:20 AM -0500

Comments

Gab, thanks for starting. Bob, Alcoholic. DOS 4-15-86 I have not been sleeping well lately, and last night only got about 2-3 hours. Consequently, I was very tired after dinner tonight. Then at 7:20, when I was thinking about turning in early, I rememebered that I had a commitment to speak at a local treatment center. Wow, what a great meeting that was. I was so tired at 7:00, but when I got home at 9:30 I felt refreshed like I had had a full night's sleep. Any length, means, even if I am tired, I still have to be there for the new guy. And I was, and he was my neighbor, who just relapsed after 1 year and has 7 days today. Talk about higher powered. Ciao family, Dr. Bob in NJ


Member: Les A
Location: Wa
Remote Name: 64.136.27.228
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 04:24 AM -0500

Comments


Member: Lisa H
Location: TX
Remote Name: 66.76.68.202
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 10:30 AM -0500

Comments

Hello all..I'm Lisa an alcoholic. Great topic and I've enjoyed all sharings. For me..going to any lengths meant being willing to do the things that I really didn't believe in: getting on my knees and asking "God" to remove the desire for me to drink, getting a sponsor and calling daily, make 90 in 90, read the big book, thats where it started. I was convinced that after trying (playing) AA for 7 years in and out, that my way didn't work and God had to have restored me to enough sanity for me to have a moment of clarity (when I knew the gig was up) and was willing to try it your way. Miracles happen in moments...It took every ounce of booze, pain, guilt and hate for me to give up. I thank God and AA for my life today and like Les..I love it.


Member: Susan M
Location: SF Bay Area
Remote Name: 64.171.33.5
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 10:58 AM -0500

Comments

Hi all - Susan, "hope not to die" alcoholic. Going to any lengths.. hmmm, just when I think I have, I seem to forget the most important thing - NOT TO TAKE THAT FIRST DRINK, NO MATTER WHAT. It was January, 1995 that I first made it to the rooms of AA. It took jumping into the estuary in a blackout, having my 12 year old son call 911, me ending up 5150 in 5 point restraints at the county hospital,transfered to the mental ward, my 2 sons taken by the police to a foster home for the night and me finally admitting to another human being the painful knowledge that I had admitted only to myself during the 20+ years of my daily drinking, that I WAS an alcoholic. I would like to say that back then I embraced recovery and now have 9 years of sobriety. I don't - just over 90 days this time. I have been to multiple in-patient and out-patient treatment programs and have all the KNOWLEDGE about my Dis-ease that most doctors don't even have. But my Higher Power has had to watch me continue to try to do it MY way, and patiently, lovingly, in spite of my own self-inflicted pain, chaos, drama, and bottoms that got consistently worse and worse, nearly killing me, led me back once again to the rooms of AA where I know the answers that I seek are freely and honestly shared. I know to the core of my soul that it is in the rooms of AA is where I belong. I cannot do this alone. And I MUST go to ANY lengths to remain in the light. At one point during my recovery journey I had almost 4 years of continuous sobriety. Why did it work then? Funny thing, I went to lots of meetings, worked the 12 steps with my incredible sponsor, did lots of service, worked with newcomers. What happened? I moved away from my support group, got into a live-in relationship with a heroin addict, who lost his recovery and started a relapse cycle that I joined in with my drug of choice, king vodka. This past 9 months I have lost 2 jobs around drinking, found myself homeless twice, in hospital emergency rooms, back to looney ward and worst of all, to the depths of spiritual despair. YES this disease IS progressive and ONLY GETS WORSE. Yet just for today, living sober, I am at peace and by the grace of God, life is very good. My boyfriend of 4 years and I made the decision to separate and follow our own recovery paths. He's been in an outpatient program and living in a recovery house. He has 90+ days also. I am renting a room in a safe place, have a new job, and am slowly taking care of my wreakage while rebuilding my recovery, which is THE FIRST priority. The "things" I pray for today are faith, acceptance, courage and the wisdom to know what I can and cannot change. I am SO GRATEFUL to be back at home in the rooms of AA. I believe there is a reason HP has kept me around and inspite of myself, alive. I know living sober is what God wants for me. I have to go to ANY LENGHTS not by thinking, but by my actions to keep this great gift. And I only have to do it just one day at a time. Thanks for letting me share. Love and peace to all.


Member: diane a
Location: michigan
Remote Name: 205.242.56.60
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 11:49 AM -0500

Comments

Good Morning to all and going to any lengths is a very good subject..I had to give up old friends and family and try to be an honest person..then after 8 yrs of trying to get my husband sober,,I had to leave because his choice was alcohol and not a wife.. that hurt me some but made me stronger and more vibrant to life and all the good friends that I do have I am a grateful recovering alkie and addict and I want to thank the people around the tables for listening and the wonderful AA program.. have a great day sober.. love Diane


Member: Mike L
Location: kzoo Mi
Remote Name: 67.72.225.238
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 12:18 PM -0500

Comments

Going to any lengths meant to me getting past the shame and admitting to family and others that I was an alcoholic/addict. I had admitted it to myself long before but until I saw that I was still accepted and loved it didn't make a bit of difference. As long as I was the only person that I could admit it to it was likexcuse to keep using. Wy bother to try stopping because it's what I am and I would just have to live with it.Only after admitting it to others was I then able to look past what I was and see what I could be


Member: Joe
Location: Palm Springs, FL
Remote Name: 64.63.231.155
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 05:21 PM -0500

Comments

Joe, alcoholic. I always put my program first before everything else. If I don't do this, I am in trouble. I try to get to a meeting everyday and sometimes more. I love the fellowship. I use to go to bars to be around people, now I go to A.A. I get so much from the members. I receive strength from them. My life seems so much more peaceful and serene since coming into A.A. I don't want to drink and lose what I have found.


Member: lee ann
Location: albuquerque, nm
Remote Name: 68.35.163.106
Date: 29 Jan 2004
Time: 11:10 PM -0500

Comments

we all make choices...............


Member: deb d
Location: salem oregon
Remote Name: 67.75.193.139
Date: 30 Jan 2004
Time: 07:27 AM -0500

Comments

hmmmmmmmmmm


Member: barbk
Location: Jersey Shore
Remote Name: 151.198.145.42
Date: 30 Jan 2004
Time: 05:50 PM -0500

Comments

Hello, my name is BarbaraK and I am a alcoholic. I have often thought about this phrase"going to any lengths ", I had very little by the time I hit bottom. I would have done anything, anyone in AA suggested, to have what I saw in the rooms. I just wanted somebody to tell me what to do. Luckily, I found a sponsor, a woman with time and great sobriety and she showed me how to keep my head where my feet were one day at a time. A meeting every day, share, pick up the telephone, be a greeter, introduce yourself to the newcomer, tell your story, think, don't drink and go to a meeting. I am today thirteen years sober with more blessings than I would have ever imagined. When going to any lengths seems too hard... remember Bill W and his wife moved 52 times in two years in early sobriety before they had a home.Today I have a grandaughter who has never seen her MomMom anything but clean and sober. Going to any lengths is what works. Half measures avail us nothing. It works if you work it. Read the promises.It's all true. Thanks for letting me share.


Member: Dan D.
Location: Springfield, MA
Remote Name: 66.31.226.244
Date: 31 Jan 2004
Time: 05:16 AM -0500

Comments

Dan D. recovering alcoholic. I just found this site, and just in time. I am coming up on 5 years of continuous sobriety this April. I have been missing meetings, and putting other things in front of my sobriety. Going to any lengths to me means taking care of me, and all the other things will follow. I found myself this past weekend in a package store, but was able to get out before buying a bottle. I knew I should call my sponsor, but was afraid to admit my desire to drink after the amount of sobriety. Thanks, I will be getting to a meeting today, and picking up my meetings going forward.


Member: tim h.
Location: mass
Remote Name: 206.216.166.23
Date: 31 Jan 2004
Time: 08:00 AM -0500

Comments

tim alcoholic- ((Dan D)) after 6+ yrs, i found myself in the same place and could not resist the temptation. Within 10 days after that, I am looking at 2 yrs in Billerica. You did the right thing and should thank your higher power for it. Us drunks arn't that smart on our own. Stay connected peace tim


Member: DocCorley@charter.net
Location: Riverside, CA
Remote Name: 66.215.254.80
Date: 31 Jan 2004
Time: 11:46 AM -0500

Comments

Hi. My name is Doc and I am a real alcoholic. Sober since Fewb 23, 1978. When I was new, I was freightened if I asked my self "Am I willing to go to any length to be sober?" I misunderstood this concept. Later I realized that it does not mean I must do the maximum on everthing, but it means "am I willing to do something, even a small; effort, to stay sober." Like asking a newcomer, 'Aren't you willing to put any money in the 7th tradition." Does not mean all you money or your last money, just something. This line of thinking made it much easier for me to apply myself to staying sober, a little each day. MNow, I spend most of my days in service work and it has worked for over 25 years. Doc Corley, Riverside, CA


Member: MarkL
Location: NJ
Remote Name: 66.80.23.98
Date: 31 Jan 2004
Time: 02:46 PM -0500

Comments

Hi, I'm Mark, and Iam an alcoholic. Going to any length to me means, I went to anylength to drink. If I apply the same energy to staying sober, FOR RIGHT NOW, then I have atleast a fighting chance in staying sober. If I am not willing to try to use the same type of energy/ motivation, I don't have a shot in being happy, joy-ous & free. I don't have to be A.A.'s poster child, but make an honest effort to try. I have several years in the program, and this is what I was taught early on, and it works for me. Yes, I find myself still desiring the drink, but using this energy (to be brief), I have been good for today, which has added upto several years.


Member: bb
Location: chicago
Remote Name: 67.73.137.83
Date: 31 Jan 2004
Time: 07:52 PM -0500

Comments

Just reading about the topic this week. And it was what I needed. I have to make a very difficult decision--very , very difficult so I still don't have an answer but it's feels good to read that other's have problems inspite of being sober. I believe God is in charge but I still am feeling bad.


Member: bobby p
Location: fairfax
Remote Name: 68.106.113.186
Date: 31 Jan 2004
Time: 08:11 PM -0500

Comments

I have been clean for five months. My life is better but i am having a difficult time with my wife. She continues to go to bars with her friends. She is still angry at all the shit I put her through with my drinking.She has a right to be angry but she has been derogatory towards me after drinking.. saying that I am an asshole,I should find me an AA girl,and she doesnt know who I am. She was drunk the other night and I thought that this hurt would be gone since I quit using.I am not going to tell her I think she has a problem because my sobriety is only five months. The big book has warned me of trying to change others, it is just that I love her so much. I will not jeopardize my sobriety by using because I am tired of all the pain I put others through.. I am thankful for AA and God. I am hurting and learning how to live without alcohol and drugs.Thank you for being there.....


Member: Tammy V
Location: St.Catharines,ON
Remote Name: 216.221.81.98
Date: 01 Feb 2004
Time: 09:13 AM -0500

Comments

I'm Tammy and I'm an alcoholic.I recently have been struggling with getting back on track i had 15mths and i relapsed in Aug since then i haven't been able to get a month.Willing to go to any lenghts has been tough for me this time around..new long distance relationship...kids school...just swamped!Seems to be my problem i haven't been willing to go to any lengths.This disease i think attacked me when i stopped going to meetings over the summer,wasn't a priority anymore..i'm all about having fun and alot of it was sober...drinking now. But with not going to meetings i started to doubt my disease the power of it (push ups eh!)and when i was weak and unconsiously isolating it got me.hmmmmm..you have given me alot to think of...God please help me!


Member: Vernon P
Location: Illinois
Remote Name: 152.163.252.229
Date: 01 Feb 2004
Time: 01:24 PM -0500

Comments

Hi, my name is Vernon P and I'm an alcoholic... a grateful recovering alcoholic. A little over 5 years sober and a little over 50 years old. The topic of "any lengths" is a good one. What AA has given me is actually what I wanted my entire life. I used other means to attempt to find those precious gifts. For most of my 50 years I was a "religious" person in the classical sense. I am still a religious person--in the sense that most of us would describe as "spiritual." Religion was for me the vehicle to find meaning, purpose, happiness, contentment, serenity. The problem was, it didn't work--for me. (For some it can and that's fine.) I sought these things desperately. Much prayer, gifts to the church, study, meetings, etc. This was my life pursuit for many years. The problem was, as an alcoholic I did not recognize the number one problem--the way I think. So I allowed alcohol to do its work. The long and the short of it--skipping the drunkalogue--God had to drive me to great lengths to bring me to a place where I could first understand my real needs. And in the course of that I found out that my real needs could be met only through the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. That meant he had to force me into DUI's, career crashes, a failed marriage of many years, numerous relationship failures, distraught children, wrecked finances, and more. The four horseman had to be set loose. In that way I was driven to great lengths to find out about the "any lengths" of this program. The result is, through the spirituality of AA and through its steps, meetings, etc. I have finally found what I could not find elsewhere. Well, we're at the end of the week. It is not likely that many will read this share before the next mtg begins. But it has been good for me. Thanks from a first time visitor to the site.