Welcome !
The meeting is now open
Hi everyone
Hello! Glad to have found this great web site. I have been sober for 3 years and my husband is just brand new at sobriety (7days) to be exact. It has been a long and very tough road to recovery> My hubby has been in denial for many years while I on the other hand struggled for 8 years to get sober, finally succeeding and very happy to be in the state of mind that I am in. I have always said that one drunk in the house is enough. We have two children, boy 5y/o and girl 11y/o. I have been so angry at my husband for long because of his bitter denial that I don't know how to act now that he is sober. We don't have any kind of intimate relationship. He sleeps in another room to be exact. I have also been extremely lonely and I am sure he has been also. I just don't know where to begin with our relationship. I guess I need to keep in mind "One Day At A Time". Thanks for reading this.
Hello. My Name is Mike and I'm an Alcoholic & an Addict. Today is my first day out of a 2-week in-house treatment program in Colorado. I've been sober for 20 days and right now I'm scared to reenter the world. I searched and am glad I found this website. Technology is amazing !
To comment on the existing topic: It seems to me that both you and your husband are in two types of recovery: alcoholism and being each other's enablers. Fresh out of the schoolroom, where I learned several great things and tools to be able to better survive, I offer this: Time and patience and understanding your new roles within your family structure is what is needed. Neither of you are using, but you both may be confused with your new roles, since you are trying to not enable each other. You'll need to get to know the new "you's" and recreate your relationship on your new levels of life. This will take time, understanding, persaverance, and love. Any way, one day at a time.
Bye.
Hi, i'm tracey --alcoholic! thanks for sharing anna. since you've been in aa for a couple 24hrs now and have been living w/ an active drunk til now, maybe it's time to get to an alanon meeting once a week. it might help make this transition a little saner for you. he has to find his very own program, which will probably be better w/out the help of his wife. i only share the experience that others have shared w/ me. mike -- congrats on the 20 days. my suggestion would be to definitely get to a meeting everyday(90 meetings in 90days) and share that you are afraid to do this "reentering the world" thing trying not to drink. for most of us, the problem isn't stopping, it's STAYING STOPPED! if you're not comfortable enough to take the risk by sharing your fears w/ the group, please pull someone aside after the meeting closes. it was suggested to me to get 5 phone #'s before i leave a meeting and know which meeting i will be attending the next day [in your case 5 men's phone #'s] :) thanks to both of you for opening up.
Anna, you need to bury the wreakage of the past, otherwise you will carry the anger and resentments inside you for a long time. Learn to let go, and let God. Trust that things are getting better and live in today's timeframe because that's all we have to work with. Good luck. I have been sober 17 years and married 17 years. Coincidence?
HI ALL; WELL, IM BACK AFTER ALOT OF FIELD RESEARCH. NOTHINGS REALLY CHANGED. GLAD THERE ARE MEETINGS ONLINE. AM INDOORS WAAAY UP IN THE FRIGID NORTH. TOO WORN OUT TO CARE. BORED OF THIS KIND OF LIFESTYLE. DRINKING AND DRUGGING. AT STEP ONE AND SQUARE ONE. FEEL LIKE ITS TOO LATE TO START OVER. FIRST MEETING IN MONTHS. SPENT THE SUMMMER DRINKING BUD, WHISKEY AND OTHER CONSUMEABLES. HAVE TO LET GO OLD AQUAINTENCES. JUST WANT TO START OVER. THANKS FOR READING
HI I'm Leanne Glad to se your on that right path to recovery Mike and all the others at this meeting.
Hi I'm Phil a recovering alcoholic and addict. In encouragement to Anna, dealing with the burden of facing yourself after years of hurtfull actions and relations is a heavy burden to carry. We have developed many self-defense mechanism's just as we used alcohol/drugs as a means to escape. The real problem is the alcohol/drugs, but it's us. Once we stop drinking there we are. It takes a conscious effort to start to go back and change the ways we deal with life and form new habits we know this can only be done with God's work in us. Be patient with your husband and realize that although you feel the separation that it may not be purposefully directed at you but a natural result of his state. I too face a similar circumstance with my wife as I attempt to make the necessary changes and try to "drag her along". She must live her life and I can but only unselfishly encourage her.
A quick look at the Tradiions states " Our primary purpose is to stay sober"
Not keep my partner sober. I must realize that I am powerless over her sobriety and can only "sweep up my side of the street." When I concentrate on my own sobriety, it is amazing how others around me seem to get better.
I am really amazed at the power of this meeting, WELCOME all that have found strengeth and another day sober within it.
may god be with you all
Hi everyone I'm John L. I have been sober 17 years now. It does get easier even if you are still a little crazy. I think maybe it's even an asset sometimes. I have lost everything in the begining it took two years to get back just a little sanity. I can't say why I stayed sober except I didn't drink and I went to meetings. My wife left me four years ago, not because of me but for her own reasons. We are still good freinds and she gave me a wonderful daughter. Time really does heal all wounds. Hang in there Mike it really does get different if not better.
hi,arthur from australia,i love the saying how inportant is it.
hI all Joanie O alcoholic here, When I need to change somthing in my life I must look at me . When I share in AA I can only share my experience strength and hope I cannot tell others how to run their program. I found alanon helped me to accept my husbands alcoholism but the only person I could change is me. I had to have faith in this program that it would help me to understand my own problems.I cannot give the power to another individual to affect or infect my life, therefore I must do the deal dont drink go to meetings call my sponsor and change everything in my life in order to recover. This program gives me the courage to change I trust it with my life and my higher power is always there to guide me and comfort me thru the darkness .We are millions strong that have made it together we need eachanother.
hI all Joanie O alcoholic here, When I need to change somthing in my life I must look at me . When I share in AA I can only share my experience strength and hope I cannot tell others how to run their program. I found alanon helped me to accept my husbands alcoholism but the only person I could change is me. I had to have faith in this program that it would help me to understand my own problems.I cannot give the power to another individual to affect or infect my life, therefore I must do the deal dont drink go to meetings call my sponsor and change everything in my life in order to recover. This program gives me the courage to change I trust it with my life and my higher power is always there to guide me and comfort me thru the darkness .We are millions strong that have made it together we need eachanother.
Good luck we all need it
Good luck we all need it
I'm addictedto sex!
i just stumbled on this meeting on the net, and am glad to hear others are working at dealing with the issues and cinsequences of drinking and drug-taking. I have never been to an aa meeting, but telephoned them once 10 or so years ago when I got to the end of my ability to cope, and the response was very helpful. my mother died of alcohol-related problems so I grew up knowing about aa through her. what i do very much appreciate it the shared idea of a higher power that helps us get through one day at a time. and like some of the others i worked around relationship issues rather than through them, when drinking. since I stopped (except for one or two minor insobrieties) about 13 years ago, I started a different life. and like someone in this meeting, that life is better, sweeter. so good luck to all of you trying to keep on this track today.
steve t.
I am glad to see all the people who want to recover from this hate full adicition
To Mr. B.Job;
This site is intended for people who are serious about their recovery. It seems to me you are jealous of people trying to better themselves, what you need is a "low self esteem" page.
I am Arianna but all of my friends call me Arrie. I am a college student who slowly slipped into alcoholism. What started as just one drink on the weekends has turned into a drink everyday to survive. Now it is even more difficult to deal with because I just found out that I am pregnant.
Blow job may be joking, but sex is another potential addiction with strong reprocussions. So if Blow job, or anyone else, is serious about beating the habit, we should help him.
Not only am I a heavy drinker, but my boyfriend and I are also heavy smokers. When I found out two weeks ago that I am pregnant, I vowed that even if my boyfriend wouldn't, I would quit drinking and smoking. We all want to do it for ourselves, but I find that doing it for me just wasn't a good enough reason. Now, I will do it for the life of my unborn child.
Hello. I'm Jeremy, and I'm an alcoholic and an addict. I, too, slipped into the pain upon entering college. I've been kicked out on academic grounds, which is due to my excessive drugging & drinking. I'm trying to stop everything, but I keep getting sucked into the scene. My body is currently beginning withdrawl symptoms, and I don't know if I can make it through the next month or so. Does anyone have any suggestions to calm the pain of withdrawl? Thanks.
I am also very happy that I "stumbled" onto this page. I have been sober six years and nine months and my life has never been better. Since I enetered the fellowship, I have gone through a divorce (14 months ago) and other major life events. My going through these mind and spirit numbing events sober was a GREAT experience. I actually learned a lot about myself by experiencing pain sober and with sober friends. I am concerned that I do not attend as many meetings as I should (?). I do not take my sobriety for granted and thank God each and every day for the gift that has been given to me (I also pray that my ex-wife finds happiness in all her endeavors. I find that if I'm not working in this direction, then I am working against her). I will enjoy hearing from others and being active in this meeting.
Hello everyone. I am the daughter of an alcoholic. I found out one year ago. My parents are divorced, so I saw my father on rare occasions. We live in the same city and I love him greatly. I am so prould of the fact that he is on road to recovery. I guess there never is any recovery, since it is something you fight every day. I want to say hats off to all of the people who have made the cahnge. It's for the best. Although some people may not aknowledge your bravery, know that they love you unconditionally.
hi, ginger c her, and all to new with computersin general.you have a problem and an opportunity.In short,alanon.yes you,too,can become a double winner.
hi, ginger c her, and all to new with computersin general.you have a problem and an opportunity.In short,alanon.yes you,too,can become a double winner.
hi, ginger c her, and all to new with computersin general.you have a problem and an opportunity.In short,alanon.yes you,too,can become a double winner.
Hi, my name is Gail and I am a recovering alcoholic/addict. To Arianna if you are still online, I applaud you for taking the first step but I want to encourage you to either start going to AA meetings or contact a treatment facility for some type of in/out patient treatment. You need some one to talk to and give you emotional support. If you boyfriend is still using, then he is probably not going to be very supportive. Not only for your child who has no choice but for yourself remember you are a child of God and you and your child deserve a sober life. I have been sober for seven years, I have three children and I feel so very blessed. The best thing I can tell anyone newly sober is stay prayful, stay in touch with other recovering alcoholics/addicts and don't get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired (HALT). When I was newly sober, I attended meetings as often as possible and got a sponser who at the time was 6 years sober and worked the steps herself. I called my sponser every day that first year!! It definately works though. Also, for the physical symptoms of withdrawal drinking orange juice or eating a candy bar helped me initially. Also- stay away from "old play grounds and play mates" don't set yourself up by puting yourself in unsafe situations. Go to meetings, get a copy of the Big Book as soon as you can. God bless you all. This is pretty cool I surfing the net on my lunch and stumbled upon this site. If anyone is there reading real time writed back!!!
I think I am about as "HALT" as a 19 year-old can be...
My name is Rod and I am an alcoholic. Nice to be here with friends. As has been instructed to me for over 16 years . . . I will keep this simple and wish you all another 24 hours from Kamloops, British Columbia, Canada.
:-)
To Gail C - I'm here on my lunch break too, what a way to start the week huh *grin* Good find!!!
If you haven't been to a "live" meeting inawhile (like I haven't) here are a few things that might have frustrated me but in all honesty helped keep me sober.
This to shall pass
KISS - Keep It Simple Sweetie (aint none of us stupid)
Let Go and Let God or Live and Let Live
GOD - Good Orderly Direction
One drink is too many and a thousand never enough
The best help for me has been God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know ITS ME!
Jeremy- I will put you in my prayers. Have you been to an AA meeting? Do you have a sponser?
How about- Do the next right thing
Dont quit five minutes before the miracle
First things first
Easy does it
My favorite is- One day at a time.
Afternoon all, I'm Roger T. and im a ex-drunk. I would like to commend you all on your accomplishments. Ive been sober for about 3 and a half years and I have found that the longer you are sober the easier it gets (at least for me!!)
For all that are just starting their sobriety hang tough and just tell yourself that you are not going to drink. It sounds tough but after doing it enough times it becomes more than second nature.
Being sober and staying sober is probably the most selfish thing i have ever done. I did it for myself not for my wife and kids (though they played an important part) and life has greatly improved because of it.
good luck to all in your quest!!
Hi Phil here Alcoholic/Addict, To both Arrie and Jeremey begin slowly with the first step of admitting your powerless over alcohol/drugs-that our lives had become unmanageable. For a long time even though I had an idea this was true I didn't want to admit it because using substances seemed the only way to make myself feel better. It was a matter of pride that I didn't want to admit that I was powerless plus I knew it was a set up, because if I was powerless than I couldn't party anymore and would have to change. Well, I didn't want to stop or change, even after losing my first wife and kids. It wasn't till I did admit my life was unmanagealbe and be 'willing to do anything' that I could see the self-deception and begin building a better life. That begins with the second step.
Jeremy- If you're there, willing to do anything and having physical symptoms and withdrawals go see a doctor. It's not a cop out or sign of weakness but the beginning of control.
Thanks to Gail for adding more important reminders to the list. I would like to commend all of you for staying sober "Just for today" because of you and your support I am reminded again of what it means to be sober and happy.
I notice just like in a live meeting the sobriety levels vary greatly but remember this
We are all only a drink away from a drunk and yes that empty chair this is yours if you want it, it only works if you live it!
I'm back to the real world but will definately be back HERE tomorrow
BIG GROUP HUG TO YOU ALL!!
WOW! I am sitting here in absolute awe! I have been fighting like hell against this disease/legacy for as long as I have been old enough to buy booze. No one (including my husband, I'm convinced) would ever know just how I spend my afternoons. That is, slowly consuming whatever I have chosen to drink, and then wishing I hadn't. I prayed so hard this morning for a means of stopping this. It's made me sick..( I knew if no one else did) and it's made me the biggest phoney I ever met. I will be here. I NEED to be here.
I AM an alchoholic.
I can't. He can. I think I'll let Him. Keep it simple: Don't drink, make meetings, call your sponsor, read the Big Book. If you stay sober anything is possible.
MARY - you are always welcome here, you've already taken the first step. It will get better!!!
now I'm really gone, i think, talk about your addictions jeesh bonnee *grin*
Thanks bonnee! Needed the words of welcome. This is the answer to my prayer, this place. Thanks so much!
hi my name is william i am 24>i just completed a 45 day program in ct. left a , ihave been in recovery b4 but this time things are much more real to me. the fact is b4 i was not fully commited tomy welfare .my brother died last july 3 days b4 his 30th bday .he was my life i felt veery responsible ,and slighted by god.iamhaving trouble adjuting to life without him.in short ,life is unbearable.ihad made a pact w/ myself to be dead by this july .but here i am . i must survive .imust nom get on.i try to let go and let god but it:sounds easier then it is .i am now commited to life. ibelieve there is something better in stotr for me.god has aplan but cannot see the logic just yet.i must say this though ihave faith!!!!!god bless,and use the force.peace out and love to all my family.audi 5000!!!!
Hi everyone, I'm Donna, alcoholic from San Luis Obispo, CA. I just stumbled onto this site, and I will probably never find it again! I read all the above comments, and I sincerely wish all of you good luck and good sobriety. So many of you are brand new! Go to lots of meetings, get lots of phone numbers (and use them!), get a sponsor (and call him/her!), get the Big Book (and read it!) This program will work for you if you do your best. I know this in my heart. I got sober when I was a teenager, and have been sober since June 10, 1975. My husband, whom I met in the program, also has long-term sobriety. We have a daughter who will be 17 in a few days, and thank God, has never seen her parents drunk or loaded. She is one of the biggest benefits that I have received from this program. When I remember to be grateful, I always thank God for her. Without our sobriety, we would not have the privilege of having her for a daughter today. No matter how bad (or good) things get, keep doing the steps and going to meetings when you can. Sometimes, things will not be too great, but life goes on whether you are drinking or not. Just hang in there and remember everything, good and bad, is temporary. Good luck to all of you, and keep coming back!
I hate these meetings..........
Laura here again, and I'm an alcoholic/addict. The gray areas can really be scary. Staying in the now is so important to me. If I spend too much time in the future, or in my sordid past, I'm in deep trouble. And it's been that way for a week now. Thank God that with His help, I can now see when I get in these spaces, and He helps me get out of them. It's simple, but it ain't easy. Keep coming back.
This site makes me very gratefull for my sobriety and life.
What a great way to have a meeting! I've read many interesting oberservations from ya'll and different viewpoints on many remadies and help organizations...but go back to our owners' manual (The Book of Alcoholics Annonomas and read page 25...read it and believe it. I've been sober for a long time and page 25 best summerizes the deal as I see it. What is all about, where we go (I love being rocketted into the fourth demension and letting God do for me what I could not do for myself...God bless all
Although I have attended many AA meetings for myself, it was moreso to understand the alcoholic in my life at the time. He had been seven years sober when we met and we decided to live together, but he still maintained very strong alcoholic attitudes that I believe was primarily the down-fall of our relationship.
The meetings in which I attended however for myself, were extremely educational both spiritually & mentally. Although I do not possess the disease of alcoholism, it has indeed greatly affected my life in many ways. I have sought counsel thru Al-Anon & CODA. Both of which for myself was a blessing!
ONE DAY AT A TIME for ALL is by far the way to go in this life...
Although I have attended many AA meetings for myself, it was moreso to understand the alcoholic in my life at the time. He had been seven years sober when we met and we decided to live together, but he still maintained very strong alcoholic attitudes that I believe was primarily the down-fall of our relationship.
The meetings in which I attended however for myself, were extremely educational both spiritually & mentally. Although I do not possess the disease of alcoholism, it has indeed greatly affected my life in many ways. I have sought counsel thru Al-Anon & CODA. Both of which for myself was a blessing!
ONE DAY AT A TIME for ALL is by far the way to go in this life...
Wow! I just discovered this site. I am from Richmond,Va and have been celebrating life for 13 years. Thanks for all of your sharing you have helped to keep me sober and I shall keep coming back. I too work the steps on a "daily" basis in all areas of my life, relationships, job, family, etc and they work. I also believe God doesn't give me anymore than I can handle. Hugs to all of you!
Hi everyone, I'm Colina and I'm an alcoholic and an addict. I've been looking for this page for a few weeks now, glad I finally found you. I found a link on the "What's New" section of the Canadian Yahoo (Yahoo.ca) page, just in case you wanted to pass it on. My husband and I are both recovering, and I agree with whoever said keep your programs separate. It works for me, I go to meetings (though not lately, new baby and mom's lazy) and try to work the programs, and when I do I find some measure of inner peace. I'm in need now of contact with other alcoholics and well, here I am, I guess my higher power is looking out for me, as usual. I came across someone's web page where they had written out the Big Book, but now I can't find it, does anyone else know where it is? I lent mine to a newcomer and now am missing it dreadfully. Bye for now
Hi I'm Mark and I'm an alcoholic.
I'm not sure what the topic is this week so I'll just listen.
Welcome to all the new people, please read the guidelines.
Have a sober day! :)
To Jeremy W. You r not alone. You r right where you should be.May I suggest....go to meetings, get a sponsor,Step 1, admit u r powerless..step 2, come to believe.. yes that's it... G O D ! I quit 11 mos. ago. Couldn't do it on my own. It took my prayers to my higher power to quit. He answered and I haven't been this happy in 25 yrs May GOD be with you all!
Hi. My name is A.J., I am a recovering alcoholic. I have been sober for four months. I quit drinking at the begining of the year and rediscovered the program June 21st, this year. I am very grateful that I do not have go down this road alone. Ten years of drinking & drugging I have a lot of experience and I am eager to balance it with stength and hope.
Hi I'm Michelle and I'm an alcoholic.
Just came across the site and what a blessing it is! I have recently celebrated 5 years and love my life and sobriety. This program has given me so much emotionally and spiritually. In my first years the promises kept me going and today they are apparent in my life. So many wonderful things have presented themselves in my life since working my steps. This is a great site and a nice place to go during a bad work day. I work for a company where half of the staff could benifit from our meetings so some days are easier than others. Thanks all for being here! Loving Life, Loving Recovery Michelle R, CA
Hi, I'm Pete and I'm an alcoholic. So is my wife. We have been married just over thirty years, most of which we spent being enablers in drinking for each other. Now we are trying to be enablers for each other in staying sober. So far we'tre not doing too bad. It is ccorrect to say that you can only take care of yourself, that has to be your top priority, but I don't care what anybody says, it is impossible to sit and watch the one you love self destruct without wanting to reach out and pick her or him up. Un fortunately, when the other is drinking, they don'tr take too kindly to the helping hand. But you keep on trying the best you can, even if it is just in silence waiting for the other to ask for help. God Bless you, and just take it one day at a time.
Pete
Hi Guys! Lori G. alcoholic, 2 plus years sobriety I ust found this page too. My husband still has denial over the fact that I'm alcoholic. He went to a couple of alanon mtgs. He said it was just a bunch of women complaining about their husbands. He does not know how to live life of life's terms and this is difficult for me often. I just have to remember that I can't give him what AA has given me. I heard once that even the Al-Anon has to hit their bottom thanks for being here I'll be back
Hi Guys! Lori G. alcoholic, 2 plus years sobriety I ust found this page too. My husband still has denial over the fact that I'm alcoholic. He went to a couple of alanon mtgs. He said it was just a bunch of women complaining about their husbands. He does not know how to live life of life's terms and this is difficult for me often. I just have to remember that I can't give him what AA has given me. I heard once that even the Al-Anon has to hit their bottom thanks for being here I'll be back
To Jeremy - I skimmed some messages because I want you to know don't give up on yourself and contact a treatment center or your nearest detox center ASAP because withdrawal from alcohol is very dangerous. Good luck and welcome to AA!!!
Dee
George P My name is george and i am an alcoholic. This week is my first time on the internet. I am so glad to have found this meeting. I have to say that I do use the Serenity Prair and going to meetings .
Hello everyone, I am Doug, alcoholic, Plymouth UK
I have read many of the shares in this meeting and see that there are a mixture of views. It is my experience that any view other that the one that works is an excuse to make me look Special And Different(SAD).
I was a veery sad alcoholic, who could see no merit in the ways that my sponsor advocated. He reminded me that I had said that I was prepared to go to any lengths and that a life run on self will had hardly been a success. It is stange to see people sharing about their husband's/wive's drinking. I would not recommend that anyone tries that nonsense in my home group. Our secretary has been known to slice tongues out at twenty paces,lol. Seriously, we cannot look to our own behaviour whilst looking at anothers. It is a matter of applying the steps to the letter. We take our own inventories, not our loved ones. Oh yes, there was that sad person who wanted to change the subject to sex. I feel that Mr.Job is probably pubescent, and spotty. He needs to grow up. Let us leave it at that and allow the spiritually dead to bury themselves. This meeting is not closed, and as much as it is a wonderful lifeline for many of us, we have to accept rule 62 and that it can also be a plaything for the people who have no need of it. They have every right to sneer their resentments, but at least we know how to deal with ours. God Bless everyone at this meeting and all alcoholics everywhere, Love Doug.
Hi Everyone. My name is Rom and I am a very grateful 26 year member of this marvelous program. This is the first time I have found anything like this on the cybernet and by chance I looked in my Netscape "Whats New" and there you were. I am always so grateful for a meeting anywhere and thank all are participating in this one. You will find me and I hope some of or all of you send an e mail note to me. It is roymar@rockies.net. This is in BC Canada in the beautiful Columbia Valley on the west slope of the Rockies. Love you all BBFN. :-) :-). Roy.
Hi Doug,
Good message, I haven't been to a meeting in too long, reading your message evoked all kinds of feelings. A reminder of what the program can do. Thanks.
Hi, all!!! Just reading the messages of encouragement out there. Thanks to all. I am currently in treatment and just attended another AA meeting today. Been sober for a little under 2 months. Any tips on ways to choose a sponsor? Much appreciated. Love to aLL.
Hi, all!!! Just reading the messages of encouragement out there. Thanks to all. I am currently in treatment and just attended another AA meeting today. Been sober for a little under 2 months. Any tips on ways to choose a sponsor? Much appreciated. Love to aLL.
Hi, all!!! Just reading the messages of encouragement out there. Thanks to all. I am currently in treatment and just attended another AA meeting today. Been sober for a little under 2 months. Any tips on ways to choose a sponsor? Much appreciated. Love to aLL.
Hello, Jan here, alcoholic. This page is a blessing! To Jeremy, go to a detox center and get help withdrawing. I tried myself and couldn't do it. At the center, they told me you can die from alcohol withdrawal, and if you are as saturated as I was on that day, you'll need help. Find a county or city or state center where they won't ask you for any money. To Arianna, I have the same problem at my house. I've been sober long enough to know that I am powerless over alcohol, whether it is in me or someone else. I'm adding Al-Anon to my recovery plan.
Hi, all!!! Just reading the messages of encouragement out there. Thanks to all. I am currently in treatment and just attended another AA meeting today. Been sober for a little under 2 months. Any tips on ways to choose a sponsor? Much appreciated. Love to aLL.
Martha, Alc, Go to lots of meeting, 90meetings in 90 days if possible. Listien, for your own story, go to lots of 12Step Meetings, You will find a sponsor. ODAT ml
Greetings, all. I am in treatment and have been sober for a little under two months now. Just attended another AA meeting. Spoke for the 1st time. Kinda good feeling. Any tips on ways to choose a sponsor? Much appreciated. Anyway, good luck to all. And Jeremy, hang in there. Get some help, please. I did. Love to all.
Hi. I'm Mindy. I'm an alcoholic/addict here in Greenfield, Mass.. I, too am very happy to have stumbled across this page. I'm approaching 2 years sober after 5 years of relapsing every few months, and I'm very grateful to be sober today. I live with my boyfriend, who has 6+ years of sobriety. At times I find myself getting resentful when he "helpfully reminds" me how many meetings I've been to in a given week, or how long it's been since I've spoken with my sponsor. While I understand and appreciate the fact that his motives are good and he really cares, I feel that it is very important that we keep our programs separate for the health of our relationship. On a good day I'll actually look at myself and ask:1. What is wrong with ME that is making me resentful? 2.Is whatever it is he's "helping" me with really need to be looked at? I, too have been in the position of being powerless over the disease of someone I cared for very much. Although painful and frustrating, I had to learn that they, too have a higher power and I can't know God's will for them.
Greetings, all. I am in treatment and have been sober for a little under two months now. Just attended another AA meeting. Spoke for the 1st time. Kinda good feeling. Any tips on ways to choose a sponsor? Much appreciated. Anyway, good luck to all. And Jeremy, hang in there. Get some help, please. I did. Love to all.
Hello I am new to this site. Actually pretty new to this internet stuff but i'm at school in our computer lab right now and found your site. I am a 27 year old college student trying to get my life straight. (college) probably not the best place to stay away from drinking. But iam still trying to get my life straight. I realized something had to be done about two years ago when my wife left me for another woman and took our kids with her to California. I know i can never have my wife again sober or drunk but I do hope there is a chance for a relationship with my son and daughter. I want to prove to them their dad can go without the bottle.
I wanted a sponsor that had aspects of sobriety that I didn't. I listened to people speak in meetings and chose someone that I felt had found some answers that I had not. I found a sponsor that had nine years less sobriety than I did and I learned so much from him! Also, consider a temporary sponsor.Like the other message: 90 meetings/90days...My sobriety date is 9/13/86.
HI ALL; JAMES S. HERE, AN ALCOHOLIC AND AN ADDICT. YESTERDAY WAS MY FIRST SOBER DAY IN A LONG TIME AND I WAS VERY HAPPY TO FIND THAT AA IS ONLINE. I AM RETURNING TO THE FELLOWSHIP AFTER ABOUT SEVEN YEARS OF FIELD TESTING. I AM A BINGE DRINKER AND I HOPE TO AVOID THE NECT ONE. MEANTIME I WILL LISTEN. THANKS FOR READING. JAMES IN THE YUKON.
Thank you for this site. It is a welcome to those people who can't get to the local AA meeting.
Hi, everyone, name is Scottie, an alcoholic. Mary K, I'm glad you're here, just don't drink right now, and keep coming back. Anna, your situation touched me, and I know if you stay sober, it won't matter what happens. It can be very painful. I am so grateful for AA on-line. I am new to the venue, but have been in AA for almost 11 years.
I am married to "one of us". He has about 3 months on me, so we lived Anna's situation in reverse. I couldn't tell you the exact solution, but sober and sane led us to counseling. We had to stay out of eachother's programs. The book says that sometimes we must seek outside help. Don't wait too long. Thanks for being here.
oo oo oo oooo oooooo oooooo hhhhhh VODKA! I I oooooo IIIII oooooo IIIII oooooo IIIII ________________________
HI EVERYONE! I'm MAYOR Z. I'm from beautiful Russia and I first time here. It's wonderful! I'm not an Alcoholist but I very like cold vodka and hot food. It's our russian tradition. What can warm our souls else? WITH LOVE FROM RUSSIA/St.PETERSBURG
MAYOR Z.
I LOVE YOU WITH LOVE FROM RUSSIA. St.PETERSBURG.
:-) MAYOR Z.
Wow:
God works on the interneet too!
This meeting is a real answer, that somehow were are all together where ever we are. Forget race, religion, color, language, gender age, soberness, looks, creed or financial status ... were all just plain old Garden Variety Drunks trying to help one anohter stay sober one day at a time! Love: Perry H in PA
To Mayor Z,
Not very smart stinking commie, I was married to one of those jerks. Can't you tell this is Alcoholics on-line meeting. If your not a alcholist as you say why are you here?????? Go home with your ohhhhhvodkahhhhh!!!!!!! JERK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Hello.
I am not an AA member, I am though a former member of ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics). I am posting this message with the hope someone knows of some on-line meeting or web page for ACOA. If anyone has any info on this, please e-mail me at the following address. Thank you. vnvy@bellsouth.net
Steve B , alcoholic. To Jim O. I'll tell you what I was told to find a sponsor. Look for someone with at least a couple of years sobriety and has completed the steps and has something in common with you that you can identify with. P.S. The promises are true. All the wealth in the world could not give me the happiness and serenity I have now. GOD bless.
Hi everyone! I too just stumbled onto this site. My daughters and I just left Hazelden's Family Week a week and a half ago. It was wonderful. Very encouraging and affirming of our experiences of living with an alcoholic. I do not know what the future is for our marriage...but I am reassured to read the comments here that we must each work our own program and that I do not need to say the "right" things to him. He will be in charge of his own business. I wish all of you out there struggling with sobriety the very best. From my own position, I am afraid of falling into "old habits." The slogans work great for us "al-anonics" too. Thanks for you sll being there for support. This is a disease with a wonderful support system.
KEEP YOUR HEALTH! MAYOR Z.
A.A. is concerned soley with the personel recovery and contnued sobriety of individual alcoholics who turn to the Fellowship for help. The movement does not engage in the field of alcholism research, or medical or psychiatric treatment, and does not endorse any causes-- although A.A. members often participate in other activities as individuals.
Page 31 " AA tradition Pamhlet"
I'm John from Kentucky. GREAT SITE.
Arianna M. / Most of us have no other alternative when we come to AA. We come here, or drink and die. You have an even better reason to stop, so use whatever help you can get from conversations with others here and at real world meetings. Go to them, please! Reason may reach your partner. Babies need the best possible family to have a quality, stable life. Thanks for trying. It does my heart good to hear a caring person that sees the problem.
Jeremy W. / Talk here. Go to real world meetings. Keep busy. TALK TO PEOPLE and stay around people as much as possible. Open up to everyone that will listen. Good Luck? Listening to both you and Arianna did me so much good!
Have you noticed that everyone wants to talk for a long time here? I do to, but it's time to stop for now.
Hi, my name is Charlie and I'm an alcoholic and drug addict. I have 12 years of sobriety and am always grateful for more meetings and ways to visit with other addicts and keep sober. I was told in the beginning to do 5 things--go to a meeting every day, talk to someone every day, invite God into my life in the morning, thank Him for the day when I went to bed, and read something about recovery each day. These things have kept me sober and healthy for over 12 years.
I,m happy to be here
Hi, I'm an alcoholic, ya'll call me DD. Could not find the topic here, but have seen much regarding the "romances-family" thing. I am reminded of the place in the BB that tells us that it behooves us to exert OURSELVES in the home as we could hardly square the accounts in a lifetime...that there are difficult spouses and families, but that we must remember that we did much to make them that way. (I need to remember also to put that into the now in that I frequently do much to make them that way day to day. Page 66 & 67 are easy to apply to family members with the disease or symptoms of it, for we KNOW that they too are Spiritually ill. Also, brings to mind where it tells me that We Alcoholics are sensative people, a serios handicap we must commence to outgrow. My old Dragon (sponsor) told me that knowing me I could get very comfortable with "Being Sensative" so I had probably better equate that with being a "Touchy Little B-t-h" she was correct, I could get a lot of milege out of being sensative, but have been unable to be comfortable staying a "touchy L. B."
Lots of New members showing up which is a great blessing. We see and hear much of treatment centers, etc. and medical detox is often essential to survival, but would like to also let new people know that there are still many of us that walk through the doors of AA on our own and many do not go back out. Slips are NOT a requisit.
Noone wants my wisdom, it sucked as badly as everyone elses I am sure, the only wisdom that I have that anyone wants is that which I acquired through this program. I must always remember that what did work was finally getting willing to do something exactly as written, no matter what I thought of it, how I "felt" about it, whether it made sense to me or not, whether I liked it or not - Just to do it as instructed. It still ticks me off that all I need to know to live is in the BB and 12 & 12, etc. It would seem to need to be more complex than that, (and it makes me sound redundant) Oh Well, so be it, for this program has given me a life I could not have ever imagined. When I have done parts of it differently from as written I have gotten results, but not the results promised in this program. It works, it really does, but I must remember that the essentials are willingness, openmindedness and honesty. I MUST stop fighting everything and everyone.
Thank you all for my sobriety, I hope to join in here regularly, just as I attend face-to-face meetings regularly. I can no more stay sober today than the day I walked in, there is a power greater than myself that does that for me and that "appropriate dependence" is the most essential ingrediant in my life today.
hi i'm ken and a alcoholic from oliver b.c can. thats near the wash. border for you (you all's) just kidding. been looking for a meeting on the web for a while good to be here looks good for some of the jokers that get on here it's to bad that some of us are sicker than others and we know that you are reaching out for help just you have a bad mouth like the guy b.j. anyway it's good to be sober and be able to go to a meeting on the internet. by the way there are 4 of us going to reno for christmas one being my sponsor and wondered if anybody could us of a meeting in reno love you all and keep coming back
Hello everyone. I'm not sure if I'm welcome here or not, but I'll give it a shot. I don't consider myself an alcoholic. I think there is a way to be able to drink but not lose control. Sometimes I have missed work, etc. due to alcohol, but it doesn't really happen much. Does anyone know of a page that deals with controlling drinking?
Thanks.
Hello everyone I'm an Alcoholic David K.. I just came across this web site. I have been sober for a few 24 Hrs since 1/92. Soberity is a gift, for me a touch of Heaven, a dream come true. "The program is a highway to freedom, which leads me to a goal of a spiritual awakening as the result of the 12 Steps". And what an awakening it is, life today is never ending it is a joy to be an Alcoholic to live really live, to be alive, one day at a time. Neat is it not,
hi, my name is alex and i'm an alcoholic. glad to be here and glad to be sober. i'm not always sure how great it is now but i am always sure how bad it was. all i have to do is think about "What it was like" and staying sober is a little easier. one day at a time. It always gets better. think about it. thanks for letting me share.
hel p
to kim r.
you're always welcome here. if you think you have a problem with alcohol you're in the right place. it's a beginning. a day at a time, a step at a time.
to mark s.
mark, what's up?
to KIM do not know of anyway for a person with this disease to control drinking, sorry, tried many ways for many years, nothing worked, noone but you can determine if you have this disease, maybe stick around and get info and decide for yourself, good luck.
to MARK help? what is up dear? (or down as the case may be)
to KIM do not know of anyway for a person with this disease to control drinking, sorry, tried many ways for many years, nothing worked, noone but you can determine if you have this disease, maybe stick around and get info and decide for yourself, good luck.
to MARK help? what is up dear? (or down as the case may be)
SORRY FOR THE DOUBLE POST, WILL GET THE HANG OF THIS SOON
****Congratulations to all on Taking it day by day. I have much respect for you all and wish you the best. Stay strong, keep positive, love yourselves and Support is always a wonderful thing. God bless, a friend from Mtl, Canada
to ALEX - Yes dear it is better and gets just as good as i will let it, look forward to coming back,(bed now)
to all who trudge the road to happy destiny.
i have to go work now, but hang in there.
be back manana.
to all who trudge the road to happy destiny.
i have to go work now, but hang in there.
be back manana.
i'LL DRINK TO THAT!!!
i'LL DRINK TO THAT!!!
Hello. My name is Kary, I am 19 years old and I am not sure if I am an alcholic or addict. I was surfing the internet and found this site on the What's New. I started to read down the meeting as it went on throughout the day. Everyone stories and stuff. I don't think that I am an alcholic. I am a college student so I drink often, usually binge drinking. If I go out I go out to get drunk, and I do. I don't go to the point that I black out or throw up, well not usually but I do make sure I am good and drunk. I am addicted to something else in my life that I can not seem to cure or get away from so I am sort-of afraid that it could happen with this. But I don't want to give up a chance for a great and really fun 4 years of college. I know that you can all remember all the good times and know that they usually involved drinking. So if anyone has some advice I would greatly appreciate it.
Thanks for listening and I think that this is a great site and seems to be do wonders from what I have read. -Kary
I appreciated Arma's comments. I have been drinking and drugging for the past 35 yrs and have 4+ months of sobriety. I just got sick and tired of being sick and tired. The thing I wasn't expecting was that I never knew a relationship sober, let alone have sex sober. As I am trying to redefine a 24 yr relationship with a normie that was "unaware" (either didn't pay attention or was just not observant,), I'm scared to death of sex. I didn't know how much my sexual life was screwed up. Letting go of old garbage has been difficult, but not as difficult as being 47 and learning how to have sex with feelings, considerations, and enjoyment. I know its not recommended that major changes take place in the first year, but I'm so different than when I entered this relationship that I'm not sure I was really in love. I just have to trust God to direct me. I'm starting to ramble, but I guess what I want to say is that once your husband gets to his 4th step, don't shut the bedroom door. Just sleeping together was, and at times still is a challenge for me.
hi ! i'm john and i'm an alcholic
note to kary c.- if you're not sure about your drinking, look in the phone book and call a.a. and go to a meeting. you might see other students and definately get much needed info. also, you might find some fun activities that do n't require alcohol or drugs. by the way, i was in college between '66 and '70. summer of love, woodstock etc.. been there, did that.
Thanks for all your comments.
Hi-- I am Jon L. I am an alcoholic. I have been in recovery 9 years. What a blessing AA is. God has given us this program. God what a gift. I have seen many burning bushes through this program. Once I found sobriety I started seeing many burning bushes everywhere.
To everyone who is new to the program.... Welcome ... get a Big Book.... get a sponsor.... this is an awsome adventure.
This is the first time that I stumbled onto this web site. I'll be back
First of all, I'd like to thank all the trusted servants who made this site possible. It's quite a kick to be able to "attend" a meeting online. Having said that, I'd like to encourage all the folks who are not quite sure of themselves to make as many live meetings as they can. Next month, I will be privileged to be 6 years old in the only program or approach that's actually changed my life for the better. I am so grateful and happy to be clean and sober and to have a sponsor who has "done the deal" and is teaching me how do the same. Much Love!!
Thank You to those who made this possible. I've been sober almost 3 yrs. and have not been to a meeting in months. My higher power keeps me sober I guess? Thanks for the opportunity to share...
My name's Pete. I'm an alcoholic. Just me and my HP here. Is there anybody out there?
Hi, I'm Laura from El Paso and I'm an alcoholic/addict. Getting back to the subject that Anna M. brought up yesterday: Even though it's rough, praise God that he's sober today and if there is sobriety, there can be healing if everyone is patient and understanding. I agree with others that Al-Anon is the best bet, for both the husband and wife in a situation like these. Even with three years, we're still alcoholics and tend to behave as such when riled. That's my experience, anyway. Unfortunately, my husband has decided to go out, and stay out. And after six years of being together and in and out of the program, I'm no longer willing or able to stand by and watch, and reap the destruction he is bringing to our lives. We've been separated and I've decided to let go completely. God & I did all we could do, and that's all she wrote. Anyway, life is wonderful. I've been clean & sober for 15 months and I'm now serving my God and spreading the Word. Peace is getting easier and easier to come by, one day (moment) at a time. May God bless you all. Thanks for helping me stay sober today. Welcome to the Newcomers. Thanks for letting me share.
It's Arrie again. I wish to thank everyone for their support and words of encouragement. Yesterday was the first day that I woke up and did not search for my usual stash, because I knew that it was not there. I got rid of it, and promised myself that this would be the end of this painful journey. No longer would I need alcohol to survive, nor would it control me. It took more willpower than I could ever imagine, especially since I have to do it alone. I am greatful for this website, because it is all the support that I have. My parents are also alcoholics and have been so for many years. they don't see it as a problem, but most alcoholics normally don't. The first step to recovery is definitely admittance. It saddens me that they are still in denial, but in order to help them, I must first get myself together. To Kary C.: I've had many nights exactly like your experiences, one as recently as last Saturday. Eventually, the binge drinking gets tired, and the feeling wears off even quicker than the last time. And then, you're back to the sick, sad reality. I'm tired of it. I hope that you can find help where you are. In the meantime, here's a few words of encouragement for everyone:
If you think you're beaten, you are. If you think you dare not, you don't. If you like to win, but think you can't, It's almost a hunch that you won't.
If you think that you'll lose, you've lost, For out in the world you'll find, "Success begins with a fellow's will," It's all in a state of mind.
If you think you're outclassed, you are. You've got to think high to rise. You've got to struggle before You ever win a prize.
Life's battles don't always go To the stronger or faster man. But sooner, or later, the man who wins, Is the man who thinks he can.
FOR KARY S. If when you drink you cant stop, and when you drink problems occur you are most likely an alcoholic. Why not try not drinking for just a month.If you are an alcoholicI doubt you will last. john r.
FOR KARY S. If when you drink you cant stop, and when you drink problems occur you are most likely an alcoholic. Why not try not drinking for just a month.If you are an alcoholicI doubt you will last. john r.
It is wonderful to read these comments. I really needed you yesterday. I appreciate that someone was inspired to do this. I am still trying to share on the staying cyber network. I have been sober for 15 years and I have been through a divorce, the death of my father, a rebellious daughter who blames me for everything, and other things but I have not found it necessary to take a drink.By the grace of God I am still sober and still trudging the happy road of destiny. But, I have self-respect, the love of most of my family though they do not understand alcoholism and I always have the structure of the twelve steps and the many friends I have made in the program. I still forget from time to time that the further away from my last drink I get, the closer I am to my next one. Thanks for being here and God bless each of you.
Hi. I just read through all the comments since yesterday and it is truly amazing how similiar AA is around the U.S. and other countries. I hope this day finds everyone sober and serene. I am so grateful to be clean and sober. Life has its ups and downs and I dont always know how to handle situations perfectly but I do know that it's God's will for me to stay sober and work the 12 steps to the best of my ability each day and to practice the principles behind the steps. I some times struggle with my desire to control. In the BB it talks about how our desire to be the director of the play & set the stage, direct the other players etc all to no avail is one of our (alcoholics) biggest problems. I find this to be true. I used to say I would rather be right than be happy. Lately I have been praying for the ability to be happy without neccessarily being right. I just needed to remind myself I am not in charge thank goodness. God is there to direct and guide me if I just get out of the way. Thanks for reading.
Happy Sober Tuesday!
It is Brenda A again from VA. This is only my second day of this internet meeting. It is truly a gift from my higher power. I attended a meeting on Friday night of which the topic was higher power stories what a wonderful meeting and I grasped so much spirituality which was one of the main attractions of AA to me. I questioned my drinking habits back in 1982 or should I say the courts did via DUI. Court suggested I attend these meetings and some special group. I attempted to get 3 months of sobriety and didn't even go back to pick up my 3-month chip and the next 18 months of my life was hell and by the end of the 18 months I had three choices left, one was to possibly end up in prison, death, or to go back to AA and attempt to live a life that could be joyous and free. I chose the AA way of life and am joyous and free. Believe me as many of you have, I have experienced life's trials and tribulations but with the help of my HP and friends in AA I have been able to live through them all without using.
Happy Sober Tuesday!
It is Brenda A again from VA. This is only my second day of this internet meeting. It is truly a gift from my higher power. I attended a meeting on Friday night of which the topic was higher power stories what a wonderful meeting and I grasped so much spirituality which was one of the main attractions of AA to me. I questioned my drinking habits back in 1982 or should I say the courts did via DUI. Court suggested I attend these meetings and some special group. I attempted to get 3 months of sobriety and didn't even go back to pick up my 3-month chip and the next 18 months of my life was hell and by the end of the 18 months I had three choices left, one was to possibly end up in prison, death, or to go back to AA and attempt to live a life that could be joyous and free. I chose the AA way of life and am joyous and free. Believe me as many of you have, I have experienced life's trials and tribulations but with the help of my HP and friends in AA I have been able to live through them all without using.
Jan here again, alcoholic. TO KARY: I have a sponsor who says to me over an over again, "Do normal people do things like that??" "Normal people" don't have to drink to have fun and feel accepted within a group of peers...she says, "alcoholics are those born without coping skills." Golly, how true! A normal person goes out an sees a flat tire on his car, goes back in his house and calls work and says, "I'll be late. I have to change my tire." An alcoholic goes out and sees a flat tire, throws his briefcase/her briefcase/purse on the ground and shouts, "why is everyone against me???"; goes inside, gets drunk and loses his/her job....! I too, have had friends that drank and partied and it seemed everyone did it and that I had to fit in with THEM. Well, guess what? Alcoholics comprise only 10% of the population, where's the other 90% at your school??? Go and find them! and God bless you!
Golly gosh, this is great stuff, seriously! I love GOD, AA and my life now I'm sober. But can anybody tell me what the subject is? This page looks just like the coffe page....
Kary S. I don't know if you're still out there or if you'll come back but if you do this ones for you.
I was 18 when first introduced to AA as a senior in High School. I felt alot like you did. I wanted to have fun and couldn't imagine giving it all up let alone being an alcohlic and not even being 21! When I walked into my first meeting I felt the most wonderful feeling of unconditional love. In my mind alcoholics were all bums but when I went to that first meeting I saw "normal" people. I was scared, scared of being an alcohlic, scared of what it meant what other would think, what my family would think etc. But what I couldn't acept at thetime was that AA could give me thethings that I always thought alcohol would... True Friends, a personality, happiness, self esteem, self worth, love for myself others and a higher power. I had the belief that Alcohol gave me all thouse things, when I drank i drank to get drunk as you mentioned. I didn't want to feel and I didn't care how I acted or how I affected others. Unfortunelty I only went to a few meetings BUT THANK GOD I DID!!! They planed a message in my head in heart and in my soul that got me back...(before I turned 21!)You DON"T HAVE TO HIT A NASTY BOTTOM and YOU CAN RECOVER AS A TEENAGER!!!!! There are young people's meetings and people out there with stories just like yours... besides alcohol I dabbled with a few other things only when I couldn't get alcohol... but the bottom line is I have an addictive personality and if I can abuse it to get out of myself I would! I also believe if you have to ask your self the question "do I have a problem" you probably do! (just my opinion) I came back to the rooms at 19 but really committed myself at 20-I have just celebrated 5 years WITH NOTHING!!!!!!! And I am proud, it hasn't been easy, but I LOVE MY LIFE TO DAY!
Recovery is fun and there are a lot of activies that go on...picnics, dances, etc... Recovery has given me true friends who accept and love me for who I AM! I turned 21 in Recovery and had a blast CLEAN & SOBER! You can be in school and have fun... if drinking and getting drunk is your answer for fun that the rooms of AA can show you a different way of life. Don't put off tomorrow what you can do today. Call an AA hotline in your area and ask to speak to someone- I suggest a woman and see if there is omeone your age you can talk to. The hotline got me home and there isn't a day that goes by that I am not greatful to the alcoholic who tweleve steped me! (we ended up becoming great friends!) As someones else suggested earlier you will probably be surpeised as to how many other people your age are in the rooms.
I heard a lot of comments when I first came in because of my age... DON"T LISTEN if you hear anything of the sort... NO MATTER HOW YOUNG OR OLD YOU ARE THE ONLY REQUIREMENT TO STOP DRINIKING IS DESIRE!
If I would not have stopped when I did I don't know where I would be today... but because I did I was able to set and achieve many personal and professional goals. I hope that you stop back by the site and that you read this....
If you'd like to talk direct you can email me at mro@micromuse.com.
Happy to be hear and to have this wonderful site at my fingertips, it is so wonderful to know I can stop by at any time and get connected!
Loving Life, loving Recovery, Michelle R, CA
I've never seen a "true" topic other than that which is still and always will be discussed at open meetings - the newcomer, sponsorship, am I really one?, and "that other program" for us doublewinners thats Alanon. Almost 13 years since I have picked up a drink but I can still remember my last night TRYING to get f-ed up, what a waste of energy, no amount of pot or speed or green or jack or bud could get me to black out or pass out or even remotely buzzed. I had a problem and that problem was me. Now I kinda like the me I've become. Thank you AA
I REALLY SHOUL STOP DRINKING, OR AT LEAST REALLY CUT DOWN IN ORDER TO DO MY JOB BETTER AND SPEND MORE TIME WITH MY KIDS
When I first started out I liked my alcohol and my alcohol liked me.
As time went on I liked my alcohol less but it liked me more.
As more time went on I hated my alcohol but my alcohol loved me and wouldn't let me go.
Does this sound like a disfunctional relationship?
It certainly does. I needed help. I was no match for King Alcohol. There were times early in my drinking when I could have quit but I liked my alcohol and didn't really want to quit. It is a PROGRESSIVE disease.
Thankfully the doors of AA were open to me.
I wasted a lot of time trying not to be an alcoholic.
As soon as I admited it and accepted it the burden was lifted.
It's not always easy, but it's always real and I'm always present.
Woody Allen said "90% of life is just showing up". My life is 100% better since I decided to start showing up.
HI I'M ANNA M'S HUSBAND. BEEN ALMOST TWO WEEKS FEEL LOTS BETTER ALREADY! TRY MELATONIN THE FIRST FEW NITES AND A CANDY BAR IF YOU HAVE TROUBLE. SWITCHED TO DIET PEPSI LATER. NEET WEB PAGES, FIRST TIME READER, WILL CHECK IN DAILY. SUPPORT IS WONDERFUL BUT ONLY YOU CAN DO IT.
HI I'M ANNA M'S HUSBAND. BEEN ALMOST TWO WEEKS FEEL LOTS BETTER ALREADY! TRY MELATONIN THE FIRST FEW NITES AND A CANDY BAR IF YOU HAVE TROUBLE. SWITCHED TO DIET PEPSI LATER. NEET WEB PAGES, FIRST TIME READER, WILL CHECK IN DAILY. SUPPORT IS WONDERFUL BUT ONLY YOU CAN DO IT.
hi this ken and i'm an alcoholic. i've been sober a decade and a half + a few 24 hrs. when i first srarted in the program the old timers seem to impress me and still do I've had acouple as sponsors and still do i wiil always rember a saying a old timer sponsor told me and would sat at meetings I DONT KNOW HOW WELL I AM BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW HOW SICK I WAS. it reminds me to go to meetings more than once a month. and look in here every night. keep coming back you new comers it works.
Hello my name is Rick and I am an alcoholic. Like many of you this is my first "on-line" meeting. I missed my home group this past week(which is a rare thing!) and began to feel apart from A.A. Then I found this meeting, read some of the story's of those who shared and began to feel a part of A.A. again! I love the fellowship of alcoholics anonymous and am grateful for all I have so freely been given. Welcome to the new comers, I hope you hear something that keeps you coming back!
So many good and encouraging comments make me realize that I am never alone. I used to think that my problems were only unique to me and used alcohol/drugs to get them out of my mind. Once I began to see that others shared similar experiences and problems it was easier to admit that I was powerless and decide to seek God's will.
On page 62 in the Big Book it says "Selfishness-self centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles."
There's a neat book called the CELESTINE PROPHECY which helped me alot to see how poorly I was relating to others and to stop thinking of just myself. Has anyone else read it and can relate it to their own recovery?
To Phil R.
Yes Phil we are all part of everything. How great it is to be the sober part and not the drunken part, shut off from the "Sunlight of the Spitit"
I don't know what the topic is but it's good to be here sober today. I missed my usual meeting today but I'm glad I came to this one. To the people crashing this site with less than AA comments, I thank you for nudging my memory. I remember what it was like. TO those of us that are getting upset about it,,, all I can say is to leave a seat open for these people, they probably need it. I don't always get what I want...I always get what I need... Thank God I don't get what I deserve. KEEP COMIN!!! Pete
I don't know what the topic is but it's good to be here sober today. I missed my usual meeting today but I'm glad I came to this one. To the people crashing this site with less than AA comments, I thank you for nudging my memory. I remember what it was like. TO those of us that are getting upset about it,,, all I can say is to leave a seat open for these people, they probably need it. I don't always get what I want...I always get what I need... Thank God I don't get what I deserve. KEEP COMIN!!! Pete
Hi from Dee E. in Roseburg, Oregon I wanted to comment on William's note - who wrote
Dee from Roseburg, Oregon William wrote yesterday about his brother who died at an early age. The only thing I know is that those of us who have lived the nightmare of addiction have lost friends and loved ones. Live on through your brothers memory and make him proud of you. Stick with the winners in AA.
Love and prayers
Hi, My name is Aggie and I am an alocoholic from Britistish Columbia, Canada. I am grateful to have had 34 years in this program. I thought that the only topic as far as the big book is concerned is what we were like, what happened, and what we are like now. For those of you who are new welcome to AA. Remember it works just fine if you work it.
my name is bess and i'm an alcoholic and an addict this is my first entry into the net aa meeting aa has saved my life in more ways than you can imagine i am working i am praying i call my sponsor i am painting i know where i am in the a.m. i like myself and to say what i used to be like .....well, you can find me in the BB... thanks for letting me share i'll pass
my name is bess and i'm an alcoholic and an addict this is my first entry into the net aa meeting aa has saved my life in more ways than you can imagine i am working i am praying i call my sponsor i am painting i know where i am in the a.m. i like myself and to say what i used to be like .....well, you can find me in the BB... thanks for letting me share i'll pass
Hi all good to be sober today
Hi all good to be sober today
This might be a good time to pass the hat and ask for donations to support this meeting and carry this message around the world. The AA mesage. Please go to "Pass the HaT" FROM OUR HOME PAGE and see how to contribute. Believe it or not this meeting is really broke and needs support to even pay for it's server time!
I contribute $1.00 for each year sober once a year!
And now back to the meeting.
Please remember, there are no dues or fees for AA membership.. but we do have expenses and rely on the fellowship to help meet them.
I guess it's easy to just pop on, leave comments and not support this. Thankyou treasurer for your time and continue to let us know any needs.
hi everyone. I'm Stacie and I'm an alcoholic. This is my first time on-line and have been searching for an AA chat room all day. Just came back from a meeting, which I really needed today. I've been sober for almost 3 years and am still amazed that I always get what I need at meetings. Glad to have found this site, and will be back soon.
hi my name is Becky and I'm an alchoholic,how can I help support.I cuold not make ameeting tonight,have a family...I'm sure glad you were here meeting not only keep me sober they also teach me to cope.I hope I did this right alchoholic mind verses P.C. ha ha ..Now 22 days sober all I have is today!!
I have to remind myself thy will be done not my will.Big hand clap and a pat on the back for my higher power keeping me sober today!!
BECKY, THANX FOR REMINDING ME ALL I HAVE IS TODAY.
TODAY I HAVE A ZEST FOR LIFE. I HAVE BEEN SOBER FOR 22 MONTHS AND BEFORE THAT I WAS SUICIDAL. MY FAMILY HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN UNDERSTANDING WITH THE WAY I WORK MY PROGRAM BUT I GO WITH MY SPONSORS GUIDANCE TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY.THIS WABSITE IS COOL BECAUSE I COULD'NT GET TO A MEETING LAST NIGHT.I WORK HARD AT BEING A SOBER MEMBER OF SOCIETY BUT OF COURSE I STILL HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO.GLAD TO BE ALIVE AND SOMEWHAT SANE. SEE YA!
I'm Lynn and I'm an alcoholic. I think you have to just jump in and tell what it was like and what it is like now. I do have a topic that is bothering me lately and that is resentment. I am trying sometimes, hour-by-hour to let go of it. I am in a work situation that is very frustrating. Im getting out of bed, putting one foot in front of the other and trying to turn it over and pray for those that I need to pray for as well as asking for this to be removed. It's kind of like dogs in a garbage can. I do know that it does ME no good. When I pray I often do not see any results in the other person. They should change immediately, you know. Anyway, here's a topic for everyone. Maybe someone will say something today that will help me to accept some circumstances I am in that I do not have the power or authority or control to change. My choice is to believe that my answer will come and in the right time and in the right place. Of course-it's not resentment really, it's patience. God bless all those who are trying.
I'm Lynn and I'm an alcoholic. I think you have to just jump in and tell what it was like and what it is like now. I do have a topic that is bothering me lately and that is resentment. I am trying sometimes, hour-by-hour to let go of it. I am in a work situation that is very frustrating. Im getting out of bed, putting one foot in front of the other and trying to turn it over and pray for those that I need to pray for as well as asking for this to be removed. It's kind of like dogs in a garbage can. I do know that it does ME no good. When I pray I often do not see any results in the other person. They should change immediately, you know. Anyway, here's a topic for everyone. Maybe someone will say something today that will help me to accept some circumstances I am in that I do not have the power or authority or control to change. My choice is to believe that my answer will come and in the right time and in the right place. Of course-it's not resentment really, it's patience. God bless all those who are trying.
Hi I'm Phil recovering alcoholic/addict. I like to say recovering because I have the alcohol out of my system and to look to God instead for guidance but, I lost my cool last night with my wife and realize I've been letting resentment build up.
Out of all the relationships I've had all my life my wife is the most angriest and insensitive. I guess I'm mad at myself for getting in this relationship and tend to be very accomodating and that's how I've let the resentment build (I feel like a pussy). The serenity prayer doen't help because it means I just continue to put up with the way the relationship is or end it. Not much peace for me in either option. Does this fit the general description of resentment or what? because that means my only choice is to end the relationship, but I'd rather be patient and wait for her to wake
HI, LAURA FROM EL PASO, ALCOHOLIC/ADDICT. I THOUGHT I NEVER HAD RESENTMENTS OR ANGER, TOO BUSY COVERING THEM UP. BUT WHEN THEY FINALLY DO SURFACE, I CAN BE VERY HURTFUL. SO I LEARNED FROM MY HIGHER POWER THAT NOT ONLY SHOULD I PRAY TO HIM ABOUT MY RESENTMENTS, BUT THAT I SHOULD ALSO PRAY FOR THE PERSON (OR PERSONS) I HAVE RESENTMENTS TOWARDS. IT'S HARD TO PRAY AND MEAN IT, BUT UNTIL I DO, THEY WILL NOT CHANGE. ALSO, I HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT MAYBE I'M THE ONE WHO NEEDS CHANGING. BUT YOU WILL BE SURPRISED AT THE OUTCOME WHEN YOU PRAY FOR SOMEONE AND REALLY REALLY MEAN IT, EVEN IF YOU THINK OF THEM AS YOUR WORST ENEMY. ONCE YOU START PRAYING FOR SOMEONE, GOD STARTS WORKING IN THEIR LIFE. UNTIL YOU PRAY FOR THEM, GOD CANNOT WORK WITH THEM - IT'S JUST THE WAY GOD WORKS, HE NEEDS A COMMITTMENT FROM US TO STAND IN THE GAP FOR PEOPLE, WHETHER FRIEND OR FOE. SO ANYWAY, IT REALLY WORKS. AND REMEMBER, EVERYONE, WHETHER ALCOHOLIC OR NOT, HAS SOME DEGREE OF SICKNESS AND DISFUNCTION IN THEIR LIVES, SO WE NEED TO REMAIN COMPASSIONATE WITH EVERYONE, NO MATTER HOW ROTTEN THEY ARE. WHICH ALSO BRINGS US TO FORGIVENESS...IF WE DON'T FORGIVE, GOD CANNOT WORK IN OUR LIVES. IT'S LIKE BUILDING A WALL BETWEEN US AND OUR LOVING GOD, WHO BY THE WAY, FORGIVES US CONSTANTLY, SO WE HAVE TO TRY HARD TO FORGIVE OTHERS. AND ASK GOD'S HELP, HE WILL GIVE US THE POWER TO FORGIVE IF WERE SINCERE. THERE ARE LOTS OF SCRIPTURES AND MANY PAGES OF THE BIG BOOK TO BACK THIS UP. AND THE PEACE AND SERENITY THAT COMES WITH IT MAKES IT ALL WORTH THE EFFORT. I LOVE THIS PROGRAM AND WHAT GOD HAS DONE FOR ME IN THE LAST 15 MONTHS OF SOBRIETY IS UNBELIEVABLE. THANKS FOR READING.
Thankyou for the insight and to God for providing it.
One of the most beautiful gifts I have rc'd from this program is the freedom of choice. I am no longer locked into relationships that I would be better off without. And if I so choose, I am better able to work on a relationship. 1) Protecting my drink or peace at any price is not present in my life. I can agree or not agree. 2) I am somewhat better at not letting other people control my behavior. I have the choice and the ability to react appropriately. (sometimes), and 3) I am better able to see and sometimes understand why others are behaving the way they are. When my husband and I have arguements I can express my feelings honestly. For instance: "I feel angry and hurt when you yell at me or accuse me wronly because I feel I am not......understood, respected (I pick one of my character flaws, the one that controls my old behaviors". It doesn't always work but at least he knows how and why I feel and why I am doing what I am doing. It has been difficult for my spouse to get to know the real me. He has admitted he has used his reactions for the active drinker, the old Mary. The new Mary may not be trustworthy, may not be even familiar to him. The greatest thanks I can give him is patience and understanding. Treat him as I would like to be treated and have a clear conscious. If need to apologize, I try to do so quickly. This is so very difficult and part of the humility I am learning about.
My name is Pete and I'm an alcoholic. I can identify with Lynn M. , particularly looking for the change in other people. That's not where the change came for me. The change was in myself and it happened in HIS time not mine. Keep coming, It works.
Pete
I am Mary and I am an Alcoholic. Through AA I learned to say The Serenity Prayer. With sober time I have learned what the prayer means. It says to change the 'things', not people, I can. I am so proficient at taking another person's inventory rather than my own. That is something I need to change! I can change my reaction to others. I can change my irresponsible attitudes and actions and change many things in my life that fell by the wayside while I was drinking. What a gift! I have been given the opportunity to take action and do something positive today that may effect my future. My sobriety did not happen overnight and for me change has been very slow despite my expectations. People have changed around me through my changed eyes. It just depends on where I am with my spirituality.
Hi, I'm an alcololic and am called DD.
The old BB tells me that Resentment will KILL me, that makes it a very important problem to me. I have heard much about praying for others around the program and I too find that it is helpful, but I must always remember the cautions and suggestions given in the 12&12 about praying for others. I must be careful that I do not pray that HP grant "X" to a person, Heal them of a malady, remove this or that, for it tells me that although such prayers are fundamentally good acts that for an alcoholic they can be areas of presumption and/or conceit, in that I am asking HP to do what I think should be done in their lives instead of asking to have HP's will done in their lives.
When it comes to resentment I have always found that the very implicit instructions found on Pg. 66 & 67 work. It tells me that I can not wish resentment away any more than I could drinking and that this was our course...There follows a specific set of instructions... We realise that they TOO are perhaps Spiritually ill and ask how we can be helpful to them, then pray for HP to SAVE ME FROM ANGER, his will be done. It goes on to say that we do not argue or retaliate (I have found no place that it says "except or but") ... we would not treat sick people that way and that if we do we loose the chance to be helpful. We cannot be helpful to all people but that HP WILL show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.. Pity, patience and tolerance (compassion). It seems a large order and I could not figure out how to begin to do this instead of my old ways. I was told that just as when I bagan to not drink that I would think about drinking or even already have it in my hand or even my mouth, and then remember, "No That Is Not What I Am Doing Now", that I should do the same with resentment. Stop immediately and do what the program teaches instead, ( I have NEVER found a graceful way to get off of my high horse, so I just have to swallow it and start over or whatever it takes)... the BB tells me that I must develope a concious contact with my HP and I was taught that staying concious of the action parts of the 4th Step other than the writtings had to be concious, consistant choices and that is how we develope that concious, thinking contact. I so wanted to say that this or that horrendous thing of my life would not, could not be dealt with in such a way, but through the years have found them All to be responsive to this method.
When I do as the Program instructs and suggests then I get what the Program says I will get.
When I do anything else I also get results, but not the ones promised by this program.
The Program works, it reallly does, when I let it.
Note: only once did I say the old cliche in meeting of "I get what I need, but not what I want" my old Dragon (sponsor) stood up right in the meeting, put her hands on her hips and asked me "Have you ever thought that what needed to change was What YOU Want?" She was right of course and you think I would have figured that out through the years, but I had not. Today I get what I need and what I want, for what I truley want today above all else is the will of my HP. (God's will = Highest Good) That way I do not set myself up for frustration, envy, resentment, etc.
Thank you all for being here. I get to allow my HP to keep me sober today with your help.
higher power
hi my higher power is with me all the time.
i could not get through a day without praying to him
hi my higher power is with me all the time.
i could not get through a day without praying to him
I'm Mary, an Alcoholic. Thanks DD in CC, Tx. I really liked what you and your Dragon said. I will study the BB more. It will be a life-time of reading and I know with time and increase in communication with my higher power more will come to me as in the promises.
I'm Lynn and I'm and alcoholic. Thank you everyone for your expertise! I have found in my sobriety that we do emphasize the first part of the serenity prayer and I thought that meant to become passive. But the second part of the prayer tells me to ask for the courage to change the things I can. I work in a political program that involves people's lives and safety. When I see things going on that are immoral and unprofessional, I do pray for God to open the eyes of that person(s). Yes, God, open all our eyes. I am left after all is said and done with what you have shared and what my sponsor taught me and that is "what goes round-comes round." There are so many threads, aren't there? God knows each thread and I believe that I am on track with Him today for He has promised and He has never let me down yet. Keep coming back! Gracias-especially to you, Phil R.
I found this on my lunch break and this is the BEST! I've been sober for awhile and although I go to meetings at home, work doesn't have anything nearby.... So this is an answer to my prayers, since work is the toughest place for my program to survive and thrive... Thanks for the meeting! And keep coming back, it works!!!
I found this on my lunch break and this is the BEST! I've been sober for awhile and although I go to meetings at home, work doesn't have anything nearby.... So this is an answer to my prayers, since work is the toughest place for my program to survive and thrive... Thanks for the meeting! And keep coming back, it works!!!
Hello, I'm Tom and I have just been able to admit that I am an alcoholic. I have'nt had a drink in five days... that hasn't happened since I was 18, almost 20 years ago. I don't think I can do it myself and will probably attend a meeting soon. I live in a small town and a bit concerned who I will meet there. The pride you all exhibit in your sobriety is very encouraging though. I, too, am feeling some effects of withdrawal. It friday and 5:00 p.m. and my gums and jaw ache. Your comments and bits of wisdom will help me through another day though. At the top of the page, Anna mentioned her newly sobor (7 days?) husband - be patient with him. I pray my wife is patient with me. She is a non-drinker that deserves a sobor husband. While I've been a little irritable this week, its better than being nasty and confrontational with her and the kids. We have'nt talked about my alcohol free week, but she certainly must notice that there are no empty beer cans to recycle, I get up with ease in the morning, and I don't "pass out" on the couch at night. Either the twinkle is a hope she holds for my success or its always been there and I just did't notice. Anna, good luck to you and you husband. He is trying for you and himself. Just another note, picked up "Drinking: A Love Story" by Caroline Knapp on day 2. Just a great book and story that got me through the week. (Available on tape for those like me that travel alot for work.) See you all again soon!
Welcome, Tom, and good luck to you! You're doing the best thing you've ever done for yourself - you're at the beginning of a whole new life.
It comes by staying away from the first drink, a day at a time.
And it gets better! Keep coming back....
And welcome to Manuel, too! We're glad to have you here.
Keep coming - all who have a desire to stop drinking are welcome.
Thanx DD for the ref. to resentment. I'm finding it's good to come on this site and comment about what's going on when it is rather than waiting and forgetting.
I guess I haven't been doing this long enough to give instructions but, it is encouraging to know that I'm not the only one who is new Tom. It is also good to know that the minor victories start to add up as your life slowly rebuilds towards an unselfish attitude under the direction of God.
Hi I'm Diane and I'm an alcoholic. I missed my meeting tonight because it's raining and I have night blindness that is terribly worse in the rain. My meeting is a half hour away. Plus I am so upset that driving home from work I looked up and was lost. I was so upset that I didn't know where I was. Those two things combined made me stay home even though I need a meeting, so please excuse my venting here. I was just told today that I am being moved out of my department and into another where there are people that I just don't get along with. Plus I feel like it is a demotion. I think I need to say to another alcoholic that I feel so upset, and I used to fix that by drinking. I have one year sober and I never want to drink again but my serenity is really rattled and I feel like I want to. I am just white knuckling now and praying for serenty and strength. Thanks for listening.
Thank you for your shares on resentment. The number one offender. It kills more alcoholics than anything else, and that includes booze!
My sponsor told me to make that list in three columns and in the end list put the defects of character that effected me. I did this to discover to my satisfaction that my fourth step consisted of the worst people I had ever come across on the left. In the middle was a good logical reason why they were on the list. I was on about page thirty something before I realised that the worst person on the list was the one on the right, and that was me! It was then that I realised that it was me who was the problem and that I was steaming heap of resentment. What a relief to share that lot. And when he said things like you too, and When I did that, it was such a relief. I am no longer alone!
Love Doug
Thank you for your shares on resentment. The number one offender. It kills more alcoholics than anything else, and that includes booze!
My sponsor told me to make that list in three columns and in the end list put the defects of character that effected me. I did this to discover to my satisfaction that my fourth step consisted of the worst people I had ever come across on the left. In the middle was a good logical reason why they were on the list. I was on about page thirty something before I realised that the worst person on the list was the one on the right, and that was me! It was then that I realised that it was me who was the problem and that I was steaming heap of resentment. What a relief to share that lot. And when he said things like you too, and When I did that, it was such a relief. I am no longer alone!
Love Doug
i'm new at the internet why is this box here. i was traveling along reading and all of a sudden there is a box -- the date is three or four days ago so how could this be? or is this the end of this subject and starting a new. all well work out eventually. it's just hard to ask for help on the internet for an "aa" chat group when i'm even confused
ok - i'm obviously is a chat group. a little about me. an alcoholic was a strong word for me. i never could go to a meeting because that word was to strong. i went to treatment on june 13 of this year. the first week they were understaffed - one counselor/admissions/nurse/receiptionist - i was determined to do this so i stayed. i also paid cash up front because that's the only way you could get in - the 10th day the place burned down - lost almost everything and played !@## getting it replaced. ok - i know that didn't matter. i'm in therapy for a year now. i made it around 70 days before i took a drink and since then have had a few more. my spouse got use to no drinking and hates it when i do - so i go somewhere else to do it. i have an amazing support group - i don't have to change "my playmates nor playgrouds" because zeor of my friends drink or drug. ok i'm looking for help. i don't go to meetings because of the above statement and because i'm scared. i went once (gave it a fari shake now didn't i) and haven't been back. i'm sober oct 29, 1997 - where do i go from here
damn - the one time i go to aa and no one is there.
whoops the meeting stopped at noon today. i've got to remember directions are a good thing. i have a habit of assuming and running with it.